The Jabberjay
by HAWTgeek
Summary: Drew,a tribute from the 75th Hunger Games,is the most hated girl by President Snow,ceven more than the Mockingjay, Katniss Everdee.They took the boy she loves, Oaklea. Drew began the opperations for a simple rescue mission. But then they made him the Capitol's Jabberjay... SEQUEL TO NO ONE WILL CRY
1. Chapter 1

**The Jabberjay**

* * *

_**Two Months Ago:**_

_**Drew's Birthday**_

"_Happy birthday to you_."

The singing continued, waking me up even more with every verse. Finally, by _"Happy Birthday to Drew!"_ my eyes were flittering open.

And there he was, my boyfriend of two months, Oaklea, on his knees by my bed, with a cup cake and big smile.

Oaklea.

I didn't exactly _smile _much. I had lived in District Twelve for so long that the gloom had set in to me. When my mother died, I had too much work to think about smiling. Boys were off limits, thanks to my overprotective older brother. And working in my father's store dominated most of my time.

Well, until _Drew Ilium _got drawn in the Hunger Games.

The Games were a practice of the Capitol people. Well, all districts had to participate by sending one boy and one girl to fight in the Arena, but it was really the Capitol's game. They were the ones who made it. They are the ones who continue it. They're the ones who demand it. And they're the ones who enjoy it.

I used to feel sorry for the Capitol people. They had nothing else to do and were too dense and shallow to understand what was going on. I felt sorry for them like you feel sorry for a small child not understanding things. But, when I had been chosen to go into the Arena, I had seen that, while they were idiots, they still knew what was going on. And they were _cheering_ for it!

I hadn't been in the Arena long, but I was already the second most wanted girl in Panem, second only to the Mockingjay herself, Katniss Everdee.

When I was in the Capitol, everyone had loved _Drew Ilium, the Strong One_. They loved the clothes my Stylist, Cinna, had made me. They loved the way I looked dark and dangerous. They loved the way I protected Robin, and they simply adored my alliance with Oaklea, thinking it'd be so dramatic when one of us had to kill each other. They wanted me to be victor, or Oaklea.

Everyone except for the Capitol's politicians and leaders. I had worn the expensive clothing that made girls scream to get one and boys to blush at having seen how great I looked in it. But, more importantly, I wore a sultry smile like I had a secret and no one would find it out until it was too late for them.

I hadn't had a secret, but, now that the Capitol looked back, it looked like I had been planning my fate in the Arena all along.

The Arena.

I had been in for less than hour, not even half an hour really, but the twenty-four of us made a statement.

It had been a plan that Districts Four, Six, and Three had started. These six people spent their training days convincing the others to join in. The only ones who were left alone was the Dream Team, which consisted of me, my old friend Robin, Oaklea, and his twin sister Skye. We all assumed that, since we were the crowd's favorite, they were putting a bounty on our heads.

When we got in the Arena, we all sprang into action. We swam to the shore, and I was ready to get to the Cornucopia with my allies and get out of the fighting. But no one was fighting. They all lined the shore, defiantly staring into the cameras. They all joined hands and shouted their District number as if to say that they were there to represent how their District felt.

I was the last one to join the Rebels, and the Capitol hated me for it.

If I had done as I was supposed to, as the Capitol had taught me, I wouldn't of joined that circle. I would have won and kept my promise to Alicia by keeping her son safe. And the Capitol would have gotten some sort of victory. While the rebels would have scored some big points with turning almost everyone on their side, the Capitol would get to show that the Capitol still wins. I would have been able to return to my beloved District Twelve, and I'd be kept alive because I had done as the Capitol wanted.

I was now on a hit list.

"What are you doing here, Oaklea, at…" I picked up the worn-out alarm clack that had seen its share of damage in the morning, "_3:49 AM?"_

"You said that you were born at 3:58, right?" Oaklea got down on his knees to look at me, and he sat a steaming cup of tea on my nightstand.

"Yeah."

"Well, I wanted to savor the last few minutes where I can say I'm older than you," Oaklea smiled as he pushed my hair out of my face.

"But it's _morning_. You know how I am in the morning," I complained, laughing a little bit.

"Which is why I brought some tea to wake you up," Oaklea motioned to the tea, "And a cupcake so you won't kill me."

"You made a cupcake?" I sat up in bed. I wasn't sure if I should be flattered that he had actually baked for me or horrified that I would now have to eat it.

"I'm not trying to kill you! Skye made it," I looked down at the pink cupcake.

"Thanks, Oaklea," I smiled as I took the cupcake, and Oaklea smiled as he climbed in bed beside me.

We hadn't really done anything. We both had an agreement that we wanted to wait until we were married, or at least not _minors_. Robin knew that, too. But, with my dad living three floors away and not being here to supervise, Robin was left in charge of the two of us.

Due to my awful nightmares, Oaklea would come in and hold me until I finally got back to sleep. And, whether he likes to admit it or not, he freaks out at night, and I help calm him down as well.

Robin honestly doesn't care about us sleeping in the same bed, but he has to pretend to for my dad's sake.

And he has tried to put a stop to it.

Which is why I smiled when Oaklea wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me close.

"Looks like you're almost done with how bad this year has been," he stroked my hair.

"Yeah," I licked some icing from the cupcake, which was also pink.

"I know. I mean, look at your luck. You didn't have a boyfriend _all Sophomore year!_"

I began to laugh.

"I mean, I thought Capitol girls were too flashy and hated it, and they're even _more flashy_ in their teens. But I still dated at least _once,_" Oaklea kissed the top of my head, still continuing the joke.

"How do you know I never dated?"

"You almost passed out when I first kissed you."

"Because only a little while before, I was supposed to _kill you_! And you were a pretty good kisser considering you could barely walk."

"Okay then, have you ever dated other than me?"

"I had a much older brother, who was insanely strong and intimating. I only dated one guy really."

"Who?"

I bit my lip.

"Peeta's brother."

Oaklea's eyes widened, and he looked at me.

"The one who is in my boxing class? The one I'm friends with?"

I hesitated.

"He was the only one who wasn't scared of my brother really. And I always saw him."

"Buh-but you're still friends? And he never brought it up!" Oaklea complained, shocked.

"Well, we dated for five months two years ago. We didn't talk for about six months, and, when we saw each other again, we were just friends again," I shrugged, making him stir. And he stared at the ceiling for a while, and I tried to break him out of it, "But who is this ex of yours? I've never heard of her," I snuggled up closer to him.

"Well, no one really sticks out. Sometimes it was just kissing in the supply closet, or summer flings in District Four, or two-date-max for the crazy capitol girls. No one really compared to Drew Ilium, the Strong One. Everyone says I'm the luckiest guy in District Thirteen," he smiled, and I propped myself up on his chest.

"Do _you_ think you're the luckiest guy in District Thirteen?"

"In the world, Drew," he caressed my face, and I leaned down to kiss him, even if it was a little cheesy.

_Beep. Beep. Beep_.

Oaklea's watch began to beep.

"3:56, Drew."

I smiled as I reached for my alarm clock and the cup of tea that Oaklea had brought.

I leaned into him as we held the clock, waiting for the clock to reach the right time.

_3:57_

Oaklea kissed the top of my head.

"You'll finally be old enough to go into battle, you know."

I had been waiting to go on the front lines, like Katniss, because I knew that I was expected to. Skye and Robin, not so much. But I felt like a disappointment not to be there.

And I knew that I had been a big reason that the Capitol had tightened its icy grip.

I didn't want others to die for it without even _being there._

"I'm going to go, Oaklea. You can't stop me now."

"I know," Oaklea worriedly rubbed my arm, worrie

And then the clock ticked again.

"Happy birthday, Drew," he kissed the side of my head, and I smiled to myself.

"And now to go back to sleep," I slid back under the covers, and Oaklea didn't even have to be asked to stay.

When we slept in the same bed, we never needed both sides. Usually, we met in the middle, where we curled around each other and fell asleep. But we took one side of the bed today, and I smiled at Oaklea's warmth.

"I love you, Drew," he whispered, his breath hot on my neck.

"I love you, too, Oaklea."

This was probably the first time I had ever really said it.

I left it implied every day, and I said _"You're crazy. I love you, but you're crazy_," a lot. But I never just sat down and said _"I love you, Oaklea."_

Well, until _now._

Oaklea gently pried my clenched hands open. He took one, but he placed something in the other one. I turned it over in my palm for a minute or two before bringing it from under the covers to look at it.

"Happy birthday, Drew," he smiled as he kissed my neck, and I looked at the bracelet and gasped.

The cuff bracelet I now held had been his token in the Hunger Games. It was from his mom as a birthday present, and he had always held it dear to him.

"Your bracelet?"

"_Your_ bracelet," he sat up, and I turned around to kiss him, which shocked him for a minute. But he quickly caught on and gave me what was probably the best kiss of my life.

* * *

**Today**

I twirled my bracelet around, staring at the _Oaklea _engraved in the leather.

My eyes watering, I looked up to the screens.

The Control Room was sort of restricted for these meetings.

Katniss, Peeta, me, Robin, Gale, the Tributes from District Two, the girl Tribute from District Four, Haymitch, and the four District Thirteen people.

I thought it was ironic that there happened to be thirteen of us. It was something Oaklea would have laughed at.

But, if he was still here, it would have been fourteen.

"What do you think, Drew?" Peeta asked me, as if I had been listening to the last hour of mindless babble. Or it was mindless babble to me.

"What?" I turned to look at the table of twelve.

Peeta and Haymitch looked between each other, as if deciding who would get to tell me.

I shifted so that they could explain without having to come stand by me in the corner of the room.

I hadn't been in at the desk in over a month now. I had a great seat, but it was the empty seat beside me that made it uncomfortable.

"A group to look for Soldier Wells," Boggs was the first one to speak, "If you consent it, I can get it ready by tomorrow."

I didn't respond for a long time.

"Will she still have time for these meetings?" Coin asked.

I knew I wasn't very helpful these days, but I used to be. Maybe it was even just for looks, being the back-up Mockingjay. If anything ever happened to Katniss, I was the District Twelve girl to take her place. And I was also something attractive to put in Propos.

"Of course," Boggs quickly nodded, and Coin gave her consent for me to join.

And then I realized that they were all staring at me.

I haven't given my decision yet. I thought I did. They _acted_ like I did.

But I had been like this for the last two months, thinking things that didn't happen. I was like Annie, I couldn't seem to stay grounded to this earth. There was really no reason to, not anymore.

No one would trust me to do things.

I couldn't be in battle. I couldn't make decisions. My teaching privileges were restricted to once a week instead of everyday, and I had lost my students where it mattered what I taught them. I was included in the videos, mainly because I was better at being scripted than Katniss. But my videos were usually showing me teaching the younger kids or such.

Katniss got all of the important messages.

My fingers brushed over the imprint of the bracelet as I thought about that day, that awful day that made this become my life.

I had known what I was getting into when I suited up in the Cinna-designed and got ready to go to battle in District Four. Oaklea wouldn't let me go without him, and I had let him. He had been in before, so what would be different that time?

I can still feel how the air conditioner kept me freezing, but the warmth from Oaklea holding my hand made me flushed. Cinna's outfit still fit me perfectly, keeping up the Coal Dust feel we had started with together.

As we sat in the Hovercraft, we talked like we always did. Our subjects varied from how Skye had teared up on my birthday the day before because it wouldn't be long until her daughter would be turning seventeen, though she was only six months pregnant, to talking about what was waiting in District Four for us.

When we got to the battlefield, we took our orders.

Katniss went to the hospital, and I went with her, mainly to help out the small staff. Suddenly-

I cringed to stop the memory.

"I'm in. I want Oaklea back."

As they went on to talk about the preparations, debating which office I should get, I could tell I was dismissed from the conversation, and I let myself think back the memory, though it made me shake trying to block out the pain.

-The Capitol's army marched back in. This was the perfect time to have a bomb, but they didn't have anyone in the sky, which meant they were here for hostages.

Katniss was quickly taken out. I was important, but not as much as her. I was given more leeway, and I was running with them, protecting my Mockingjay, when the shots rang out. I was unlucky enough to get a shot in my arm from a fast-running Capitol soldier who was in front of the others, and I smiled to myself as I took out my gun.

I had been good with aim for a long time, just not with Archery. But I had taken a special liking to guns. For months, I had been taught how to use one, and I was just waiting to try it out. And who better to take the shot than a Capitol Soldier who didn't know what he just started?

I hesitated before my first kill, and I had to remind myself of all of those that they had killed before me until I could finally take aim of my gun.

Including how they had tried to kill my older sister, who was the sweetest girl in the district.

I told them to run on, and I took my shots. Then I ran out of ammo, with the last two soldiers who had come after me grinning as they took aim. I started to run to the first shelter I could find, and I ran faster as a first shot fired.

But it was firing the wrong way, the wrong direction. I didn't look back.

I didn't even think of Oaklea. When I got shelter, I found more ammo on my suit and I loaded up. I climbed a fishing market, and I took aim for the guards. More had gathered, and I had knocked three off before they figured out where I was. They put down their guns and pointed towards a flock of Peacekeepers with one single guy in the middle.

_My guy._

I killed the three remaining guards the second they picked up their guns so I could say that they were at least armed. I ran to the flock of Peacekeepers taking Oaklea.

I didn't know what I had planned, if I had _anything_ planned. But I had to try something. I was running and searching for some sort of bomb, something I could set off to get some soldiers away from Oaklea. Some way to even get him a weapon. _Something_!

But I was pulled back by a strong nurse, who had worked with me in the Hospital, because she knew a rescue mission would be fatal, and she injected a shot in my arm before I could fight back.

When I woke up, I was in my room, with the shades drawn over the fake windows. Robin was sharpening a dagger at the foot of the bed but quickly ditched that pastime to talk to me, to ask me how I was feeling and all.

And to tell me that Oaklea hadn't made it out.

But that news was nothing compared to the news I got two weeks later.

He was alive and being held personally by the person I hate most in this world.

_President Snow_.

* * *

**Future, I posted it! Finally!**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Oaklea:**_

_I listened with tears in my eyes as Drew continued to sing. It was a beautiful song though it was sad. But I wasn't crying because of the heartbreaking lyrics. I was crying because of her beautiful voice, the way it was impossible not to listen to. I was crying at the thought that these thoughts had gone through her head._

_That she had wondered about these lyrics, wondering who would really cry when she died._

_I wanted to tell myself that she didn't have to think like that, but I knew that she had. I knew that she had known that there would be people who would cheer at her death in the Arena. I knew that she had mulled over who would be the ones to cry because I had, too._

"_As long as you're there, I don't care if no one will cry…"_

_Drew didn't say anything after she finished the song because there was nothing to say. Instead, she just laid there as I held her tightly._

"_Now my childhood songs seem petty."_

_Drew laughed, probably more than she should have. But I knew it was nice to be here. To feel safe after the nightmares, the remaining pain that the Capitol can put as through._

"_My dad didn't like me learning this song. He tried to ban it, but he couldn't stop my mom," Drew laughed at the memory, though I knew it must of hurt her._

"_My dad didn't like me learning all those _kiddy_ songs about George and the Sandy _Beach_, or The Prince and the Gems."_

_Drew continued to laugh. _

Beep. Beep. Beep.

My eyes shot open, and I sat up quickly to look at the nightstand beside me, where a screen sat.

My itinerary blinked before me.

It would stay there until I was to go for breakfast, but I took detail of it like I'd never see it again.

This was the same as it had been day after day, but I still memorized it like it was completely new.

I had been personal prisoner of President Snow for two months now, and I had taken that time to understand my captive.

While I couldn't get in the head of the illustrious president, I could understand his motives. I knew why he wanted me here, and I knew that it was brilliant.

When I first taken captive, I was held in a white cell that was like a box for two days while on a train or something. I had spent that time to prepare myself for the brutal torture I was about to receive. But it didn't happen.

I was in a train station underground, and I was ushered to a room where a Prep Team basically attacked me. I was drugged so that I was awake but too numb to try to escape. After a while, I blacked out, and, when I woke up, I was in this room with my alarm beeping. I got up cautiously and saw that I looked different.

My features were the same, and, if you _really_ looked, you'd see I was Oaklea Wells. But my hair was dyed a sandy blonde. My eyes were a dark brown. My skin tone was changed as well, a sunny tan instead of how I used to be pale from having to stay underground all of the time. I knew that someone wanted to make it so that I had changed. But they didn't want me to be _too_ unrecognizable. I could tell that much.

Over time, I saw that I wasn't going to be tortured too much. I was going to be seen by the friends of the President, as if bragging, and I was to be called President Snow's visiting nephew, Beaumont. I was like a pet, a trophy to see what the President had accomplished against the Rebels.

But it was mainly about Drew. President Snow hated Drew, maybe even more than he hated Katniss. He wanted Drew to know that I was being held by President Snow. He wanted Drew to know that anything could be happening behind these closed doors. He wanted Drew to hear from various spies that I was being held in President Snow's home. He wanted to break Drew.

And I worried it was working.

I hurried along with my shower and getting dressed in the suits that the Prep Team had left for me.

I knew what would happen if I acted up. If I simply was late, made mistakes about my identity, or even tried to escape.

There were two punishments.

The worst was for trying to escape only.

President Snow would inject me with a truth-saying drug personally, and he'd find out what my favorite memories with Drew. And he'd take one away. He'd leave traces, a feeling that I had once loved the memory and that it involved Drew. But I couldn't remember.

The other one was the one I really hated, and had to go through a lot.

For everything pretty much, I got this. The levels varied. Sometimes it was for a short amount of time and bad but not unbearable. And then it could last for hours, and being dead would be better than having to put up with it.

It would happen at night, when I was left to my room. The entire room would turn to screens. The covers were locked down so that I couldn't hide under them, and I was stuck. They showed Drew.

Talking in the interviews, in the Chariots, in training, even swimming in the Arena. They'd be everywhere so I couldn't escape, and they'd mix in others. They'd make images of her being held in a torture room, screaming. They'd show pictures of her and put spatters of blood around her. And, then at the very end, they'd show her Rebel photo, with _We'll kill her_ instead of how it had been _I'm Not Dead Yet._

I shuttered as I thought about it, and I quickened myself as I got ready so that I wouldn't have to already have a transgression to earn me it again.

The sliding door opened, and I hurried through and down the hall.

I didn't stop to look or test my luck with the tired guards. I followed the path to the breakfast room, and I went to stand at the table.

This morning we had another politician, who smiled when she realized who I was, to join us.

"This is my nephew, Beaumont," President Snow smiled like a snake.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," her voice was sultry, probably mocking me for Drew, but I ignored it.

"As to you," I followed what I had been told in past days, and I bowed as I took my seat.

I wanted to take the knife they had set at the table and slit both of their throats. I wanted to get out of here, and I knew I probably could if I could plan it right. But it would take a lot to get back to District Thirteen.

And it was better that I was here. If I did get to District Thirteen, they'd go after someone closer to Drew. They'd take her brother, they'd take her father, they might even take her sister. None of them would be able to survive this like I had, and they'd lose it forever. And then I'd be on their list like Drew. They'd go after my family and the ones I loved. They might even take Drew and torture her like they'd torture me.

It wasn't worth it.

Not yet anyway.

_**Drew:**_

I looked through the clothes in my closet.

I had all of my Hunger Games dresses, even the destroyed one from my Rebel Photo. I had my beloved dress that Annalisa and I had made and that I had worn on the reaping. I had my Training Clothes and some collected clothing from District Twelve. But these were more for memories than dressing.

I slid into my white jumpsuit and boots, and I let my fingers run over the armor that Cinna had designed.

It didn't quite match the Mockingjay, though I often had to be by her in videos and photos. It was sleek and fit me well. The fabric was a strong, unbreakable weave, and there was unnoticeable padding in my chest, legs, and arms. The black fabric went from my ankles to my wrist, and it was slightly shiny like the dresses Cinna had made. I had a utility belt, fit for my knives and guns, and I had extra pockets all around, including the pill that would instantly kill me on my right shoulder.

I hadn't worn in two weeks.

The last time I had worn it was when I was put on camera for a short time, showing the recruits some techniques. But, even that video was mostly about Katniss. I wasn't the same without Oaklea. They still liked me and all, but I had become a package deal with Oaklea Wells. It didn't feel right not to have him standing by my side.

And I was so hollow. I couldn't make you want to jump up and fight a war when I barely looked confident in my own cause.

So, Katniss took over again as star.

I hurried out of my room, and I didn't stop to look in Oaklea's old room like I used to.

Instead, I kept walking.

I ignored breakfast since I knew Skye, who had become high up in the cook ranks, wasn't going to be making breakfast due to a doctor's appointment, which Robin was taking her to.

Oaklea used to take her.

I had filled in after he was taken. In more ways than one. I helped take care of Oaklea's mother, who was a sweet woman even though she had no earthly idea how to take care of herself. I helped Oaklea's father adjust to District Thirteen when he had been so used to District Four. And I had especially helped out Skye

Skye's soon-to-be born daughter was the reason we were here really. Because of that baby, I became her ally, and I got close to Oaklea because of that. I also loved Skye, and I wanted to be there for her now that her brother has been taken prisoner.

But I couldn't today.

I hurried through the halls and took an elevator. I stayed on when most went to the dining hall, and I used my new key to unlock my new floor.

I felt sick as the elevator went lower and lower into the ground, and I began to regret joining this team. I knew that I needed to be there to help find Oaklea, but I wasn't sure I could take it.

What if I did find Oaklea and the capitol had hurt him? Or changed him? Or made him hate me? Or even _killed_ him?

I was running through all of the scenarios in my head when the elevator dinged open.

I went past rooms that probably hadn't been used in decades and ones that just gave me the creeps when I finally reached the number that Coin had given me. I had a team in there, or what team they could spare for me. And I was worried about who was on the inside.

I had specifically asked for Robin, and he was permitted to come, though he was currently taking care of Skye. I had first wanted Skye to join, but I was quickly reminded that, with the baby to be born soon, she didn't need too much stress. The rest was left to Coin and Boggs.

My hand trembled as I zipped my key through the machine, and the green light appeared. I heard a large click as the lock released, and the door slid back. I hesitated but quickly came in.

The door closed behind me.

Everyone looked up at me.

I realized that I knew almost everyone in this room.

Ramma- the one who directed almost all of my videos

Alecca- a District Thirteen soldier who had been nice to me when I first got here

Lissa- a District Twelve girl from the Seam who was high up in the District Thirteen military by now

Hamrick- BeeTee's favorite District Thirteen scientist

And a few other faces I knew.

"Drew Ilium," one of the young soldiers ran to me and shook my hand, "This is your team."

I looked around to all of them, and I felt myself smile.

They looked strong, maybe not physically but emotionally. They could definitely keep me up at this.

Alecca quickly got to work.

"We've heard that Oaklea will be on Caesar Flickerman's show tomorrow evening. We'll learn a lot of his situation there," he explained as he brought me to the desk, where there are screens galore.

"We need something of you, Skye, Robin. We have the footage of you from the Games. Training, the actual games, chariots, and interviews. We want to mash it up along with current interviews. We can start shooting tomorrow. We should then have enough time to polish it up and air the next day, or even that day if they announce he's Oaklea Wells," Ramma quickly told me as she began to consult a tablet, where she was probably putting together my outfit for the interview.

I nodded, and I looked to Alecca again, hoping he actually had information.

"It'll be after the interview that we can really get something, Drew," Alecca told me.


	3. Its Just Politics My Dear

_**Drew:**_

I watched in the mirror as Octavia continued to change me, to change me into _the Strong One_, yet again.

An hour ago, when I first got here, I looked tired. I had bags under my eyes. I was beginning to look pale from the lack of sun. My hair was oily and covered with split ends. And my nails were a monstrosity, as Octavia had wailed.

But I was no longer that.

My skin looked soft and fresh, like I hadn't missed one night's sleep. My make-up was done so that you'd think I was naturally this perfect. My skin was painted a tan, and my nails were perfect alone. But Octavia couldn't help but paint my nails the shiny black she had made me known for.

It felt weird how everything was different but nothing had changed.

I was in a costume again, becoming the Strong One, with Cinna leading us on.

I was being put in another interview for Politics.

And President Snow was still controlling me.

He had first taken my freedom, uprooted me from my perfectly fine District Twelve life and brought me to the Capitol for the Hunger Games. He had then tried to take out anyone I-or any of the other tributes who had turned on him-had cared for, and he had come close to destroying District Twelve while he was at it.

Then he took Oaklea.

A different blow to the heart entirely.

"Annalisa? Hair time!" Octavia yelled, which was like talking at a normal pace considering how loud it was here.

Annalisa, who loved working with the prep team, was fast to come over with my clothes and to fix my hair. It had been her job long before it had been Octavia's. In her eyes, I was hopeless when it came with what to wear. And, in my eyes, she was _too_ keen about knowing how to do it.

Octavia instructed Annalisa, but I couldn't hear her. I trusted her though.

If she hadn't known how I was supposed to look, I wouldn't of just let her do that. But Cinna had made it extremely clear. I was to look beautiful but natural. I was to wear simple clothes and a simple haircut. There could only be two flashy things, the Mockingjay necklace around my neck and the truth inside my head.

Octavia marched away to go check on Robin.

"Now, where can you change?" Annalisa looked around, and I smiled at this offer. I hadn't been given this is so long that it felt almost like a joke.

"Don't worry, Anna. They've all seen my body. And I'm wearing underclothes anyway," I stood up and began to untie the notches on the robe. Annalisa seemed hesitant, so she looked around again.

This area had been blocked off for a few prep team members, mostly girls except for two boys, and the director's assistants. They were only three of them, one for each of us. And the only boy was working with Robin towards the corner.

Annalisa finally gave in and handed me the clothes.

I had a little trouble with the cargo pants because of all of the notches, but I knew that they'd look good. I pulled a form-fitting black shirt over my camisole, and Annalisa fastened the Mockingjay necklace around my neck. She made little finishing touches because she knew what looked good on me.

She fastened a fake golden stud on my right upper ear. Annalisa then changed out my girly flats for a pair of shiny combat boots. She removed the golden hoops that Octavia had insisted on. And she applied something to make my eyebrows not look so perfect.

"Sit down, we don't have long until you need to be there for the interviews. They need the sun up," Annalisa's nimble fingers began to work on my hair.

It was amazing to watch her. The best I could do with my hair was brush it back, but she had always had a knack for things like this. She could curl like it was the only thing she knew, and her braiding was magnificent.

She pulled my hair out of my eyes and braided it back, how it had been when Cinna had sent me to the interviews the first time for the games. She decided against putting the silver ribbons like Octavia had wanted, which I loved. She took the bottom half of my hair, the part that was down and used some sort of off curling iron to make my hair wavy. She also made it so that you could see my scar where my chin meets my neck, which they were trying to play off as being a war injury.

"All done, Child of Prophecy. All done," Annalisa set her hands comfortingly on my shoulders.

I smiled thanks to my older sister, and I stood up to get a good look at myself.

"I look like _the Strong One_ again," I wasn't sure if I was telling Annalisa or myself.

It felt weird to be the _Strong One_ when I really felt so weak. I had found my weakness, my Achilles Heel. And his name was Oaklea Wells.

I wasn't used to having a weakness like this. I loved Robin, he was my brother. I had thought for years that he was my weakness, the one I had to protect. But I had never felt this kind of despair when I had lost Robin the few times. I had felt despair, yes, but never like this pure pain.

When Robin was gone, I felt broken, but I could still get my working parts to carry me on. But I couldn't function without Oaklea. I hadn't known him long, true, but I couldn't seem to live without him now that I had lived with him.

"To the surface everybody!" Ramma yelled through the room, "You can finish up there!"

The prep team hurried around, collecting supplies, but we all looked done. Skye looked gorgeous in her identical outfit, and Robin looked handsome in his. The only thing at seemed to be different among us is the way our necklace was made. Robin's was a golden dog tag, with a Mockingjay engraved on both sides. Mine was like the locket that I had worn when I got into the games. And Skye's was the most complicated, and beautiful. It was a golden necklace, made to look romantic, and in the very center there was a Mockingjay.

Annalisa went to help the Prep Teams, and Skye came up to me, locking her arm around mine.

"How's the star doing today?" Skye laughed as we followed Ramma.

"I should be asking you that. You look amazing, Skye," I smiled at her, and she shook her head.

"False flattery will get you nowhere. I'm eight months pregnant. Until this little thing is outta her," Skye poked her growing stomach, "I won't accept any of it."

I smiled at Skye as she put her head on my shoulder.

"What are we going to be doing in these interviews? Just talk about Oaklea? What good would that do?" Skye complained once she realized Ramma was out of earshot. We didn't dare question her when she's around. Not unless we want a long, _loud_ lecture about art, though I didn't see how this could be considered _art_.

It was politics.

Entertaining politics.

But politics none the less.

"But remember, you must act like you and Robin are still in love."

"I still like him," Skye tried.

"But neither of you have _acted_ on it."

"I'm eight months pregnant, Drew. And I just can't tie him down to a baby like that when it's not even _his_," Skye pouted.

"But he wants to be there for the baby. He's basically said it a million times. Everyone knows," I tried not to laugh.

Skye didn't speak as we came to the outside world, where everything was all set up. Instead, she just held onto my arm.

"Drew, you're up first. Come on. Come on, hurry along. The sun _will_ set!" Ramma pulled the person who was going to interview me, Claudia Billson, to her seat on the black chair, and I quickly ran to meet her.

I took my seat, and Ramma went behind the camera.

"You nervous, Drew?" Claudia asked me as they got everything put together.

_Definitely_.

"A little bit."

"Don't be. I won't be as hard as Caesar."

As if.

I had a plan with Caesar. I knew the questions. I knew where to lead him so he's ask what I wanted to be asked. I had spent hours bracing myself for the hard questions. And, if it ever got too much to bear, I could always lean on my Dream Team nearby.

I was on my own right now.

Was this how Katniss felt in the interviews?

No wonder she was so nervous. How did Peeta handle it so well?

"And action!" Ramma yelled.

"How are you feeling, Drew?" Claudia asked as she crossed her legs.

"Good, overwhelmed but good," I smiled with a shrug.

"How does it feel to be on camera again? In an interview? After the Hunger Games?"

I paused for dramatic effect.

"It's something," I laughed, and Ramma motioned for me to continue, "It's really a little surreal. How much has changed in such little time."

Claudia seemed happy that I had just given her a gold mine.

"How did you feel when you got in the Arena?"

Here goes nothing.

_**Oaklea:**_

"And let's meet the Capitol's favorite new star!"

I straightened my jacket and came out on the stage.

I felt sick as I thought about those words.

What was I to them?

Someone to distract them from the war?

A star to fill their boring lives until the next Hunger Games?

The crowd erupted into applause as soon as I took the stage, just like I used to.

Would they realize I was the old Tribute from District One?

Highly unlikely.

Why would they think like that?

They might me be smart, maybe. But they would never think to compare me to a traitor, to the famous Oaklea Wells who was trying to bring their comfortable and worry-free life to an end.

I smiled to the cameras and waved at the people of the Capitol as I came to Caesar Flickerman. He shook my hand and ushered us to sit down, which I quickly did. I guess I was still used to the orders President Snow gives me.

I could tell that Caesar recognized me.

"Now, what's your name, Handsome Young Lad?" Caesar smiled at me.

"Beaumont Winston," I smiled and nodded.

"Well, Beaumont Winston, it's a pleasure to meet you," he shook my hand.

"I'm a big fan, Caesar."

_So much so that I would love to be the one to kill you_.

"Now, tell me how you know President Snow."

"He's my uncle," I smiled.

"Now how great of a job do you think he's doing?"

Horrible.

"Amazing."

Caesar and the crowd laughed as they readily agreed.

I began to wonder if they meant it. I hadn't meant it when I lived here, though I had to say it.

"And you're living with your uncle now?" Caesar asked, and I nodded, "Why is that?"

"Well, my father died when I was a little boy."

Everybody awed.

"He was a politician, and I was still so amazed by his job. And my awe grew as I got older. And my mother found out that I was interested in politics, and, of course, being a mom and all, it came up at a family dinner. And my Uncle Snow offered for me to come stay with him for a while, find out what it's really like in politics."

"How do you like it?" Caesar asked me, and I bit my tongue not to tell it all.

"I'm learning that it's definitely hard work. But it's very rewarding as well."

Caesar nodded, and I felt sick as I remembered the script we were both going by.

I wanted to leave little hints, showing that he was a bad leader and all. I wanted to get a message to Drew, that I'd try to get home. I wanted to do something at least. But it wasn't worth it.

Caesar quickly got it upbeat again, trying to make it so that people loved me.

"So, what's your favorite song?"

I thought it over and smiled to myself.

This couldn't do any harm.

"_Who Will Cry_."

Caesar smiled.

"And why is that?"

I blushed, waiting for him to figure it out.

"I have a feeling there's a girl involved!"

The crowd laughed loudly.

"My girlfriend. She taught it to me. Her mother used to sing it to her when she was a little girl," I smiled at the memory of Drew singing it, "She always had such a great voice."

"How'd you two meet?"

"My uncle actually," I smiled at the realization that I was telling the truth.

"Are you two still together?"

"Yeah, we haven't seen each other in a while. But, what can I say? I love her," I smiled, and the crowds yelled. Some girls seemed upset that I was taken, but some thought it was so sweet that I was publically proclaiming my love for my girlfriend, whoever she was. And I knew that, like I had seen in the past, almost all of the teen Capitol girls were breaking off their relationships saying, _"You'd never do what Beaumont did!"_

"And I'm sure she loves you!"

_**Drew:**_

"Yeah, I do," I mumbled as I watched the interview.

Skye looked to me and wrapped her arms around my shoulder and rested her head on my shoulder. Being the good friend he was, Robin slid over to me and wrapped his arms around my waist as he set his head on my other shoulder.

I felt everyone staring at us, but I didn't care.

We sat in command, watching on the floor. We had watched the earlier stuff, so we had all gotten comfortable.

Some of them stayed in their chairs, but the District Twelve people had quickly gotten away from that. It had been awkward, but it had somehow come to Katniss sitting between Gale and Peeta, and the three had purposely stayed quiet towards the back. But the remaining members of the Dream Team had gotten together with blankets and sat almost inches away from one of the large screens.

The interview continued like this, and I couldn't look away, though I wanted to.

"The crowd loves him, like he's a teen idol or something," Boggs stared at the screen in disbelief.

"They loved him like that before. Why not now?" I couldn't look away from the screen, where Oaklea was laughing.

But I knew his eyes, even if they were covered by brown coloring.

I knew that he hated this all.

And I completely agreed.

As I thought back to my interview, I felt ridiculous.

People were _dying_, and I was smiling in interviews about how I had started dating Oaklea.

"But he looks alright, Drew. He doesn't seem too hurt," Skye tried to sooth me.

"You're the one who needs to be calmed down, not me, Skye," my eyes watered.

"But he said he loved you, not me, Drew. He's worried about you," she whispered where not even Robin would be able to hear her, "He knows I'll be taken care of."

"I promise I'll get him back here for the baby," I whispered back.

"For all of us, Drew."

"For all of us," I agreed.

_**Oaklea,**_

I was quickly ushered into my room, and I sat down on the bed to untie my shoes.

But the peacekeepers stayed.

I was about to ask them what was going on when the projector came down from the ceiling, and a screen came down with it.

"I didn't do anything! Not this again!" I screamed as I got up, feeling my anger boil inside of me.

"It's not a punishment," one of the peacekeepers explained.

"What do you mean not a punishment?"

"It's an important message from the President for all Capitol citizens," the peacekeepers told me before leaving me alone in the room, with the door closed tightly behind them.

I sat back on the bed to hesitantly watch.

It was a simple message, talking about how Panem would triumph over these Rebels like they had before.

And the only interesting part was when the anthem played and it clicked off.

It went back to its regular program, something about a famous Capitol singer named Willi, and I was about to reach up and turn it off when something else cut in while Willi was in the middle of some awful song.

"How are you feeling, Drew?" a blonde Rebel, who I had met in District Thirteen while we were shooting a video, asked the girl sitting across from her.

"Good, overwhelmed but good," Drew shrugged.

I gasped and waited for the President to shut it off.

But he didn't seem to know it was on.

"How does it feel to be on camera again? In an interview? After the Hunger Games?"

"It's something," Drew laughed "It's really a little surreal. How much has changed in such little time."

It made my heart swell to see her laugh again. Having been through the same things, I could see the tiny details that the Prep Team had made.

Cargo pants that offset her green eyes.

Her half-up-half-down hair-do she was known for.

Her nails being painted a color to draw attention to her _Oaklea_ bracelet.

I had to admit that her Prep Team had done an amazing job to make her look like a goddess, but I still preferred the way she looked in the morning, where she curls around me and truly lets herself relax.

"How did you feel when you got in the Arena?"

I ran to sit in front of the screen, to see Drew again.

"I was definitely scared. And I felt a lot of regret that I had to be there, that I had to kill my friends. That I didn't get a choice."

"So, you weren't planning to do what you did in the Arena?"

"No," Drew laughed, "Even in the Arena, I thought about not doing it. I felt that fear run inside me, the fear that the Capitol had created. But I realized that my fellow tributes were right. We didn't have to let the Capitol walk all over us."

Drew wasn't very good with the scripted propos. They usually needed to catch her while she didn't know she was being filmed. But she was good at the interviews, always had been.

She had spent enough time with Peeta to learn that.

"Was there anyone joining that really influenced you?" Claudia asked, and I could anticipate Drew's answer.

"I guess that'd be Oaklea."

They showed the footage of me in the Arena. I hadn't realized what a great job Roman had done trying to make me noticeable though I had to wear the same as everybody else until now. I entwined my hand with my twin sister and screamed my District Name. And the Capitol allowed them to do a close-up on Drew, trying to show that she could still kill them.

"Were you very close with Oaklea?"

They showed clips of us in training, laughing together.

"Yes, I guess I was."

"Is it anything romantic?" Claudia asked as if she was a friend bringing this up in the lunchroom, and Drew blushed a little.

"Um," Drew pushed her hair behind her ear, showing the Oaklea bracelet.

"So, you don't kiss and tell?" Claudia laughed, "But, can you tell us when you started dating?"

"Right after the Arena, basically as soon as we got here," Drew decided against telling about the kiss in the Hovercraft, which shocked me since I knew Claudia wanted her to say it.

"Was it love at first sight?"

"Well," Drew smiled, "Yes and no. It _could_ have been love at first sight, but we couldn't think like that. Thinking like that would get us killed in the Arena. So, it was _interest_ at first sight. But, after we became allies, I sort of saw that it was becoming love."

They showed the footage of the Chariots, where we were caught staring at each other and the cameras used it to create drama.

"What made you two allies? When you both probably should have been enemies?" Claudia looked at Drew with interest.

"It was actually Skye, Oaklea's twin sister. Oaklea and I were rivals until Training. Skye and I bonded, and she demanded that her brother make us allies," Drew left out Skye being pregnant.

They showed me and Drew shaking hands in the Training Center.

"What a great sister!"

Drew laughed with Claudia.

"Skye's great."

"Do you have any really great memories with Oaklea?" Claudia asked hopefully, and Drew hesitated, "Don't worry. I think it's okay to kiss and tell just this once."

"Well, um," Drew began, hesitating because she probably didn't want to have to share our memories to the country, "There are so many things."

Drew looked like she might cry.

"Well, there was one time, I guess. Oaklea actually tried to teach me how to use a gun."

Claudia laughed, probably seeing where this story was going, and I saw that I had forgotten this memory if she was telling the truth.

"Well, so, we were outside, and we both had a gun. Oaklea had set up a few targets, and he gave me the basics on how to shoot. At first, I was really bad. I missed every target. And then Oaklea wrapped his arms around me, and he showed me how to aim better. And," Drew smiled, "I hit every target after that, sometimes with better aim than Oaklea. So, of course he was angry, and we had this shoot-off. And we destroyed the targets and had to pick out new ones. But we kept shooting until we ran out of ammo."

Claudia laughed as Drew finished out the story with "Oaklea is so crazy."

"How did you feel when you found out Oaklea had been taken prisoner?"

Drew froze up, and I could see the pain in her eyes.

"It hurt," Drew began to quiver, and she toyed with the cuff I had given her for her seventeenth birthday.

"Where you there when it happened? When the Capitol took him?" Claudia asked as she folded her hands together.

"Yes, it was the day after my birthday. I was seventeen, so it was the first day I was allowed to go into Combat. Oaklea had tried to talk me out of it," Drew tightened her grip on her bracelet as if it was the only thing keeping her there, keeping her from crying on national television.

"How long has Oaklea been gone?"

Drew hesitated, as if she didn't want to admit it. I had long forgotten how long it had been. I just knew that it had been day after painful day. I had neglected to count how many days, or even how many weeks or months. The only thing that seemed to help me along was the season. The seasons had changed. It was becoming fall, no longer the hot summer.

"About two months."

Two months.

It's been two months?

"What are you going to do about it, Drew?" Claudia asked, and this seemed to be the only answer Drew really knew.

"I'm going to get him back."

They showed a slide show of me with Drew. They showed us at the interviews, smiling at each other like we had a secret. They showed me nudging Drew and making her laugh in training. Then they showed a slideshow of pictures of us. The first was of all four of us, laughing. The next was just of me with Drew, taking aim of our arrows in training. The next was a memory that I still possessed but didn't know they had photos of, you could even tell that we hadn't none there was a picture because we were just sitting on the grasses, with my arms wrapped around her about to lean down and kiss her.

Then it shifted to another interview.

Skye.

This was the first time anyone had ever seen her growing stomach on TV.

Two months.

I've been gone for two months.

That means her daughter will be born any time now.

Taylor.

Is she still going to name or Taylor or has she decided on something more romantic, like Odette (what she always said she'd name her daughter when we were younger)?

"How are you feeling, Skye?" Claudia asked, smiling mostly at the baby bumb.

"I'm feeling pretty good considering," Skye laughed as she set a hand protectively over her growing abdomen, where my niece was waiting to be born.

"So, tell me. Is this Robin's baby?" Claudia smiled, and Skye laughed a little more.

"This is my late husband's child. I was already pregnant when I met Robin. That's actually what Drew and I bonded over, I told her about this little baby."

"You're a little young to be a widow, right?" Claudia smiled.

"I know, right?" Skye was able to laugh about it now, Taylor being gone, and I thanked God that Drew and Robin had helped her with that, "We were actually pretty young when we got married, and we had actually just found I was pregnant when he… when he…"

Claudia patted her hand comfortingly.

"So, do you know if it's a boy or girl?" Claudia smiled, trying to get everything happy again.

"It's a girl, Taylor, after her father," Skye smiled as she continued to hold her stomach.

"How's Robin been about this? Did he know you were pregnant?"

"Well, I'm not sure if he knew or not. I think he guessed it, because he was always helping me search for deserts at lunch. And I suspected Drew might of told him. And, when he found out, when I told him I mean, he didn't seem surprised. So, I guess he knew. But he's really been great about it," Skye smiled.

"Are you two together?"

"No, not really, no. It's really not a good time for that. We've got a war to fight, my baby's about to be born, and there's so much going on," Skye told her, and I realized that it had been five months and they _still_ weren't together.

It all continued, but it was a little fuzzy because President Snow had just seen it on screen and wanted it gone.

I also knew that he had another problem.

For those smart Capitol citizens who had a brain under all of that make-up and hair dye, they had just seen pictures of Oaklea Wells. And they had just seen Beaumont Winston in his interview. They would connect the dots. And President Snow couldn't have that.

_**Drew,**_

I watched the elevator rapidly ding with each floor.

It was past the curfew, and even Robin was back in his room.

But, when Alecca had offered to do some extra work tonight, I immediately volunteered.

I knew I wouldn't be getting to sleep tonight, not with the interviews.

Just with having to talk about Oaklea, listening to his sister cry as she remembered the stories, it'd be hard to sleep. But seeing him, knowing that President Snow had found my weakness, that was enough to keep me up for the next month.

"Oaklea must be making fun of his hair," Alecca smiled, trying to break the tension, and I let myself smile.

"Just dying his hair must be drying him insane, not including all of the work that must have been put into it," I laughed, forcing away the thoughts of other things that could be driving him insane about his capture.

I couldn't help but mentally go through the interview, looking for something.

Pain in his eyes.

Scars.

Bruises.

A strange fidget or odd way of standing.

Hurt voice.

Even a small burn from the flattening iron that the Prep Team had used on his hair.

Anything.

But I only saw him rubbing at his eyes every now and then because of uncomfortable contacts and the look of annoyance because he was being forced to talk to Caesar Flickerman.

"He looked good, not hurt too badly," Alecca tried, and I looked over to him.

If it hadn't been for Oaklea, I might of fallen for Alecca. He was handsome, with big blue eyes and brown hair. And he was insanely nice, despite his reputation for being heartless in battle. Alecca, whose mother had been a Capitol One rebel who had moved here when she fell in love with a District Thirteen rebel, was particular caring for new comers after all of the trouble his mother had been put through. He was the kind of guy who trusted, the one who'd want on your side.

"Do you think we hurt him? By appearing strong? Snow wants me to be broken, and he's the one with all the cards right now," I asked hopefully, praying that I was wrong. I wanted to keep Oaklea as safe as he could possibly be, even if it meant leaving my beloved Rebellion Stage.

Alecca hesitated, and that answered all of my questions right there.

"They can't physically hurt him. The Capitol people have seen him. They love him, they'd care if he was hurt."

I hesitated, feeling myself begin to shake.

"I'd rather they hurt him physically than mentally," I rubbed my arms, trying to find warmth as I began to feel my heat drain out of me, "Bruises heal, they leave. But your mind stays forever."

Alecca's eyes filled with compassion, and I knew he was trying to find a way to console me. But there was nothing he could do.

"The Capitol fans will protect him, Drew," Alecca tried.

"Which means it'll be hard to get him back," I gripped onto the handle in the elevator and forced myself not to double over.

* * *

**_I was finally able to get on my laptop for awhile, which meant I could get to this!_**


	4. The Jabber Jay Speaks His First Word

_**Oaklea:**_

I sat at lunch while Nicolt read off a list of things for me to do today.

I couldn't help but glare at her.

She had changed since I had last seen her. Her hair was blonde now, with the bottom being Owl Feathers. Her lips were painted to match the pattern of the feathers, and her eyelashes had the same sort of feather at the end. Since her face was now what took center stage, Nicolt had dialed back how she dressed but not by much. Her bodice was made out of the same feathers that seemed to consume this girl who had probably once been normal. And she wore tight fitting leather pants underneath that went into her leather boots.

Overall, she looked like the turkey's that roamed in front of the President's mansion around Thanksgiving.

Nicolt.

Her looks just showed me even more that she was no longer the Nicolt I knew, the Nicolt who had promised to through my sister a baby shower as soon as we got out of the Arena. The Nicolt who had maybe once cared about me and had definitely cared about Skye.

This Nicolt was someone new, someone who belonged in the Capitol. Someone who would sell out her friends and beliefs to get to the top, to wear expensive clothing and drive expensive cars.

"Willi is so excited to meet you, she wants to put you in her reality TV show. It would be great for your image," Nicolt told me as she finished out of schedule, but she still wouldn't meet my gaze. I knew it was hurting her, but I kept silently daring to look at me, to look at the boy she had once bet for.

Finally, Nicolt lowered her voice and glanced at me.

"Oaklea, don't look at me like that."

"Like what, Nicolt?" my voice was defiant. I wanted to hear her say it.

"It isn't that easy, Oaklea," she whisper-hissed, "You ran off with them! Everyone was targeted. It was a miracle they spared me and Effie. You're not the only one whose life is on the line."

"If you hate the Capitol so much, why are you here then? Why are you back?" I whispered and leaned over the table to get a good look at her.

I started to see traces of my Nicolt bleeding through. Her eyes were still like the rainbow. Her roots were still a boring blonde-brown. She still had a facelift scar right in front of her ear. Her flower tattoos were almost gone, but they were still visible if you looked for them.

"If your President Coin held you in a prison and then suddenly came to ask if you would like to go back out into the world, with no exceptions, if only you do your old job, wouldn't you do it, Oaklea?"

I thought about it and saw that I couldn't answer.

"I wouldn't pretend that I was emotionless, like someone's pain meant nothing to me," I hissed back.

"I didn't ask for you to run off, Oaklea," her eyes began to water, and I wondered if her eyelashes could even blink away tears, "I didn't ask for a rebellion. When you got off that platform, I expected to see you do what you were supposed to do! But you didn't."

I paused because there were so many things I wanted to scream back at her.

"Do you have any idea how lucky you are? Your Prep Team knew _nothing_. They only knew that you and Drew had an alliance. But Roman was killed, your head stylist was _killed_. The only one who's still around is Isis, but that's because she had just been transferred to work on President Snow! You should be thanking President Snow for letting you stay in an expensive house," she motioned to the President's Mansion, "with your expensive clothes. And luxurious food. And your adoring fans."

I wanted to respond, but I was thinking about my Prep Team.

What had been the last thing I said to them?

Isis? "_That hurts!"_

Opal? _"I am _not_ wearing diamond earrings. I will wear the diamond suit. But _not diamond earrings_."_

Roman? _"Don't worry. I'll do some sit-ups to put Robin's abs to shame."_

And I would never say anything to them again.

I had been told that most Prep Teams had been killed, but I had never really thought about my Prep Team, the ones who had given Skye a cake to celebrate her pregnancy. The ones who had dressed to impress, trying to keep us alive by giving us sponsors. The one who made me wear a skirt but grew on me so that I couldn't kill them.

Nicolt's feather-covered tablet beeped, and she jumped from her seat.

"Photo shoot! Up, up!"

I jumped up and followed after the fast girl, though I couldn't imagine walking so fast in such uncomfortable-looking shoes. I followed her to a wing I didn't know, a wing I had never even known about.

Nicolt leaned in to some screen, and her rainbow eyes were scanned.

Room after room branched off, all in metal like it was a torture chamber.

I was happy to not get a chance to look at all of the doors, all so eerie as I thought about what was going on behind them.

Nicolt's sharp fingernails gripped into my wrist, and it took all of my willpower not to _"Eep!"_ as she pulled me through one of the doorways and slammed the metal door behind me in a loud thud.

Then I gasped.

They quickly changed the screens.

But I had seen the first images.

Drew.

It was all Drew.

Her before the games, as a little girl clinging to her mother's skirt as someone took a photo of her. Her at her mother's funeral, holding her two siblings hands. Her being drawn in the Reaping, scared and feeling the burden of the risks setting in. Drew at the train station, holding Robin's hand and staring into the cameras with determination. Then arriving in the Capitol, where photographers surrounded her and the legendary couple, Katniss and Peeta. The Chariots. Training. The Interviews. The Arena. And then beyond, things that they had gotten from propaganda from District Thirteen.

Nicolt tightened her grip, as if warning me not to react.

"Where is Geneta? She's supposed to help Beaumont get ready! This is his first photo shoot! We don't want to make this any harder for the guy!" Nicolt removed her sharp nails from my wrist and marched over to some guy in front of a computer, though it probably wasn't his fault, and I looked at the pictures of me where pictures of Drew used to be.

"I'm right here, Nicolt," a girl timidly stepped forth, Geneta I suppose.

_**Drew,**_

I gulped down water like it was the last I would ever see of it, and I mentally made a reminder to take up on my old-friend status to have my ex, Peeta's brother, ease up on the training.

It wasn't until we had both finished our water bottles that I looked to the girl who had been gulping down her water beside me.

I liked Katniss, I guess. But we weren't friends.

I get along with the other older tributes, except for Johanna really, and Katniss is the same. But I guess it's because I didn't listen to her. I didn't take her well-meaning advice. Not only did I not ditch Oaklea, I decided to become Capitol's Public Enemy number one for him.

"You did well on the interview thing last night. You almost made me want to go and find him, too," Katniss smiled weakly, but she wasn't good at consoling. That was Peeta's job.

"Thanks. Robin did better though. He's mastered the camera. I'm sure more people cried with what he said than what I said," I smiled weakly as I wiped my chin and set the empty water bottle back down.

After a long time, Katniss spoke again.

"Was that stuff true? About the shoot off, I mean?"

"Yeah," I smiled at the memory, "Only I left out some of it."

Katniss raised her eyebrows.

"As Claudia's said a million times, I don't kiss and tell."

Katniss smiled, laughing a little.

"You really love him, huh?" Katniss smiled at me, and I nodded.

I was about to say something when Katniss finally finished what she had wanted to say.

"Did you love him that much before the Games? Or did it happen here?" Katniss asked hopefully. I knew she didn't want to think that she had told a girl to kill the boy she loved considering what she had been put through.

"I don't know," I finally answered.

"I'm…" Katniss took a deep breath, "Sorry for telling you that you couldn't trust him. That he was just another Capitol boy, someone you should stay away from."

I stared at her in disbelief.

Was Katniss…_apologizing?_

"When I got to know Oaklea, I saw that he wasn't really a Capitol boy. But a boy who happened to live in the Capitol."

I smiled at Katniss.

That was probably the best compliment you could give Oaklea around here.

I had to admit that dating Oaklea had been something loved through all of the districts, except for District Twelve. They thought he was just a Capitol guy, and they were so disappointed in me. Since showing off my sultry smile on camera, boys started taking notice of me. And there were a lot of people who held it against me for choosing the _"Pretty Boy"_ instead of someone from my hometown District Twelve.

"I'm sorry for being mean to you because of Peeta. It's your business if you want Gale or not," I tried, suddenly feeling so guilty.

"Well…" Katniss glanced at Peeta, who was teaching some kids camouflage while a camera rolled, and Katniss didn't have to finish it. I knew what she was going to say, "I don't know anymore."

She sighed, and I took it upon myself to help Katniss with this, if anything to get my mind off Oaklea.

_**XXXXX**_

I was allowed to take an early shower since I smelled awful and it was starting to distract from work in the _Underground_, what I called the unit to rescue Oaklea since the actual name sucked.

_ROSE_

And Roses reminded me too much of President Snow.

I reached for the towel outside of the shower, and I wrapped it around myself in the shower, even though there was no one out there. I was just so used to having to share the bathrooms.

I couldn't help but smile when I padded through the tiling to the mirrors without slipping, like I always seemed to.

I took my own time washing my face, making sure that I could find my real skin-tone underneath all of the fake tan. I even got the time to use that special cream that Cinna had given me to make my legs look better.

Cinna had made my legs my best feature.

They had to be with all of the mini dresses and dresses with slits.

My face was pretty, but it looked tired now. My arms used to be great, but they were covered in scars and my muscle tone was starting to get pathetic. My torso was a little too muscled in my opinion thanks to my trainers focusing on sit-ups. And my skin was too dry from the lack of hydrating soap, which was reserved for the Prep Teams around here.

But my legs were the same, still so long. Still so perfect.

As I got dressed back into my frumpy white jumpsuit, I thought of what I'd be doing right now if I hadn't been called. If another girl had held Oaklea's hand and declared war on the Capitol.

It's about time for school to start up again, so I'd be getting home from school. I'd change out of my clothes and into the Pharmacy Uniform. Wedding season is about over in District Twelve, so Baby Time is starting up. So, by now, I'd be down in the vault, getting the shots all ready for the pregnant women. My older brother would take over some of my other duties, like helping clean around the store, and he'd help me study when I finished the shots.

I had to admit that I missed the Pharmacy, the dust everywhere. I missed having to run to school because I had helped my dad with the store in the morning, and I even missed the girls ignoring me because I was awful at _girl talk_. I even missed the way that boys were scared off my brother, Robin, and Peeta until it was clear that I'd_ never _have another boyfriend.

I forced away those thoughts and started to walk back to my compartment.

As if on cue of my door opening, the TV flickered on.

_Another video._

Great.

I sat down to see what sort of magic District Thirteen had once again created.

But what I saw made me gasp.

Oaklea.

Or Beaumont, I better say.

He was…_everywhere._

Events.

TV shows.

Interviews.

Even waving to crowds of adoring teen girls.

How had they done all this in _two days_?

A newscaster, Daisy, smiled into the camera, showing off the petals surrounding her face. She talked about what a sensation Beaumont was, even to appear on Willi's reality show next Wednesday. She explained that he had even gotten a coveted invite to an exclusive event, which apparently meant that he had made it into their society.

"And the biggest part is the political role that Beaumont has taken on!"

Everything else seemed petty compared to President Snow's masterpiece.

I remembered our job when we first got to District Thirteen.

_The Mockingjay and Her Flock._

Oaklea and I had been the most important members of the flock, earning us more photo shoots than we'd like to admit. Each District got their Tributes in their pictures, along with Katniss photos, too. But the Capitol had gotten more than just their tributes.

They got Katniss. They got the Flock. They were taunted with the memorials of dead tributes. And then there was the photo of me with Oaklea.

And here I saw it again…sort of.

They had taken half of the photo, the part with me, and they had pasted it to a photo of Beaumont.

On my side, it was dark, smoky, and grungy. It actually looked like what some of the war looked like around District Twelve. I was smeared in dirt and blood, holding onto a scratched up sword. My combat boots were purposely messed up, and my shirt had rips and tears everywhere.

But on Beaumont's side, everything was prim and perfect. They had used a photo of the gleaming Capitol as his backdrop, and he was absolutely perfect. His blonde hair was in a fashionable blowout. He wore a perfect fitting white jumpsuit, like what Oaklea had worn in training, and he held a shiny sword that had obviously never seen use.

"Oh my God!" I gasped, feeling sick to my stomach.

And then the TV showed the final photo.

_The Jabber Jay._

Jabber Jays, the Capitol's pride and joy, even if they didn't work out.

The creation of the Jabber Jay showed that they were in control, more than politically. They could even control the creation of species.

Suddenly, everyone wearing feathers made sense.

Beaumont didn't look in the camera, he looked above it like there was a powerful war raging. He was dressed in the glimmering colors like that of the Jabberay, and he held his sword again.

"And there he is now!" Daisy smiled as she moved over for the camera to focus in on a store, where Beaumont was being surrounded by his "Crew".

He didn't seem to know yet.

The reporter continued to babble off as Beaumont left, but I couldn't listen anymore.

Instead, I stared at the screen.

How did President Snow even get this out here? Or was it Coin?

I knew she wasn't the president I had expected for the Rebellion. She was still a ruthless politician, and I was still a pawn for her to get what she wanted. But she had the people behind her to start a good nation, I knew that much at least.

It wasn't my place to judge. Not now anyway.

But then the report flickered off and my communicator began to buzz with a page.

_Report to Master Control. Immediately._

I knew what came next.

President Snow wanted a war.

And I was sure as hell going to give him one.

_**Future shows up next chapter!**_


	5. Depends On the Day, Peeta

_**Futurina "Future" Cabello was based on Futurenovelist887, who has a great Hunger Games fanfic, Never Let Go.**_

* * *

_**Oaklea,**_

What did she think of me now? Not only was I not trying to get home, I was becoming President Snow's Jabberjay?

Was she starting to wonder if I really was Beaumont now? That Oaklea Wells was gone and had made room for Beaumont Winston?

I hated that boy in the mirror, Beaumont.

He was so perfect. He knew nothing the world outside of the Capitol. He claimed he wanted to become a politician to help people, but he wanted to be like those before him, like his uncle.

I hated what he stood for.

And I hated most that he was the reason I was still here. That they had singled me out that day. And the reason that I wasn't with Drew now. That she was far away, taking care of Skye and probably forcing her own feelings aside.

I couldn't help but think of the last time I had seen her really be herself. Her seventeenth birthday.

With that wide grin of hers. With her black hair falling into her green eyes. With her curtains drawn to make her feel like there were windows behind them.

She had looked so peaceful, so relaxed. It was so rare to see her like that. Not to have her sitting on the floor, hugging her knees as she thought about what she'd done and how the Capitol would make her loved ones pay for it.

That was the first day Drew had ever told me that she loved me. It had always felt like she said it since I told her I loved her all the time, but it wasn't until that day that Drew had really told me.

It wasn't until that day that Drew had let me in.

And I fell even more in love with her.

As the limo pulled to a stop, I was finally able to pry my eyes away from the slideshow of Beaumont.

But what I saw next wasn't much better.

My window rolled down to see the girl leaving a mansion.

I gasped.

Rose Monroe.

How long had it been since I had seen her?

Not long enough.

It was clear to me that Rose had gone under the scalpel.

She had beautiful before, but she looked like a goddess now.

Her dress fit her new-found curves, and it was so amazing that it made you wonder if Cinna had made it. Her red dress was a red mini dress, showing off her long there was a red train that followed after her, which Drew had made popular. The back was too sexy for her age of only seventeen. It went down her bag in a triangle, and the train led down the same triangle.

When she had been born, her hair had been rose-red, which is what her mother said she was named for. But she was the same sandy blonde of my twin sister now. Her newly-thick lips were colored a ruby red, and her teeth were unnaturally white.

But Rose hadn't been named after her hair. And she wasn't a Monroe either.

She had been named after her biological father.

President Snow.

Everyone knew that she was the daughter of President Snow, but no one reported on it. And Rose had even told me herself when I had first turned her down, claiming that it wasn't a good time for dating.

But I had really just hated her.

The door slid open for Rose, and I had to pretend to smile at her because there were cameras rolling.

Rose giggled and nudged me, as if I had something funny, just as the door slid closed, and I let my smile fall.

"Hey, Oakey," Rose rubbed her foot along my leg, laughing as she called me the name that my little sister had started.

I pulled myself away from her, sitting as far away from her as I could get.

"Don't be like that," she sprayed her rose perfume and reached for a champaign flute.

I answered at her by glaring.

"Listen. The public wants you to have a hot girlfriend. And I answered the call. You better get used to it," Rose typed in a code and reached for a little green pill that I remembered from high school parties, "You want one?"

I shook my head, and Rose shrugged as she swallowed the pill that my old schoolmates had called Buzz.

"If we have a lot lies to keep straight, shouldn't you not be Buzzed?"

"When did my dad get in the car?" Rose reached for another glass of Champaign, which my partying days had taught me don't mix well.

I nodded towards the miniature camera embedded into the limo.

"He might as well be."

"You know?"

"You told me."

"I did, huh?" she laughed as she picked up breath spray, which also smelled of roses to cover the unmistakable Buzz smell.

"I turned you down. So you told me as if it would make me choose you."

"Now Dr. Asja makes boys choose me."

I chose not to respond to her smirk, but, even if I had wanted to, I wasn't given the chance, because Nicolt suddenly scooted through a tiny window where the driver sat to sit at the front of the limo.

She looked like a ballerina from the Swan Lake, only with owl feathers. They wrapped around her and enveloped the petite girl. And her blonde hair was expertly wrapped around her head in a bun. And she added to her short height by feathery high heels.

"Who are you?" Rose sat up quickly, slamming the box full of Buzz close.

"Nicolt Zania. His assistant," Nicolt made it obvious to avoid her, which almost made me smile, and she quickly did her finishing touches.

An invisible ear piece if I needed help.

A list of people to avoid and drinks to stay far away from, where Nicolt looked directly to Rose.

And she also gave me some pill which will prevent any kind of hangover tomorrow since I have an interview with Flickerman tomorrow.

"Ready, Beaumont?" Rose smiled as she pointed towards the red carpet party that our limo was approaching.

"Be good," Nicolt whispered in my ear.

_**Drew, **_

I closed my eyes tightly to break through my morning fog and think of the security code for _The Underground._

At five AM sharp, Annalisa had rushed into my room, turning on any light in a thirty food radius. She basically dragged me out of the bed and started covering me in make-up.

She would be busy all day with the wedding party, making sure that the bride, Annie, looked like the most beautiful woman in the world on her wedding day. And, as soon as she had finished with Annie, she would be moved over to Katniss to hide her many scars.

Annalisa had known that this would be the last time she would be able to help me get ready for the wedding. And the cameras would be on me, too, after my big interview.

I should be thanking her, I know. But waking up at five AM had ruined any chance of a "Thank you" from me.

As I looked at myself in the mirrored sliding doors, I had to admit that she had done well.

My hair had been straightened and hung down my back, with the help of extensions to make it longer, and she had an old silver pin with _"Even Troy Must Fall_" written on it in small letters, which was about something that my last name, Ilium, meant in Greek Mythology. She had left black glitter over my grey eye shadow, and she had forced glitter on my fake eyelashes by putting it on before the extra mascara dried. And she had taken special care to not put any lipstick on me by using lip liner to bring attention to my lips.

I wouldn't look as good as the bride today, but I would come pretty close.

I shouldered the two dress bags as I mashed in the code.

As he was calling off Annalisa to help with the bride, Cinna had given me my dress and Alecca's suit for the night.

He had asked me to bring the suit to Alecca, thinking it was just a simple task.

But he had never tried to track down Alecca.

I first went to his compartment, which was hard to get to since all of the soldier's mainly lived on that floor and were all leaving for their morning drills. When I got there, he was nowhere to be found. I then went to his parent's compartment, where he often was, and his mother had told me that he was rarely at his own home, always working.

So, I went straight to the underground.

I was starting to wonder if Cinna had plotted to give me the hard job or if he was ignorant of Alecca's strange ways.

The door slid open silently, and I hurried in to place the two heavy bags up on a hanger.

I was about to call out for Alecca when I saw him.

He sat with the rigid posture only a soldier could have, and he used one hand to type away on his desk and the other to sip at a cup of something that steamed (Coffee? How did he get coffee?). He stared ahead at a hologram in front of him, mesmerized.

It wasn't Alecca that took my attention though.

It was the girl in the hologram.

Futurina Cabello.

Future had been the District Six tribute in the 75th Hunger Games with me.

She actually had a chance of winning the Hunger Games before the Dream Team arrived.

But her Prep Team had been awful and showing her potential.

At the chariots, her prep team had been horrid.

They had forced her into a form-fitting vinyl orange dress that made her look like a traffic cone and must of taken enough baby oil to cover the entire country to get into, and absolutely _no one_ could look good in that dress, not even the magnificent Skye Wells. Her lips had been covered in neon orange, and they had put an orange tint in her red hair.

And, after a few jokes at her dress's expense, Future was forgotten by the public. The Prep Team scratched everything and began again, trying to make her look beautiful and gain her fans back. But once you've been forgotten…

For her interview, Future had looked a million times better, beautiful even. Her long red hair had been swept up in a bun, with a head piece that looked like train tracks. And the dress… Even Skye had been jealous of the dress.

From the head piece, they had imprinted more train tracks leading down to her dress, wrapping around her in a bodice, and the track ended at the bottom left of the dress, where a train was beginning to come into view. The dress showed all of Panem. Starting with the forest of District Twelve to the metropolis of District One. And it all moved around. The wheat waved in the wind. The waves broke. The lights turned on and off in District One. And trees were chopped down in District Seven.

Future deserved to take center stage that night, I admit that. But somehow, my dress had stolen the night in all of its simplicity. And the dream team had dominated the talking part of the interviews.

But Future didn't want the stage, she made that clear. She didn't want to glorify the Hunger Games by playing along. She wouldn't do it. She even took the risk of telling how her parents had really died. About how they had been brilliant engineers for the train system, so full of life and love. About how they had worked with Albrovo, a chemical that the Capitol had known was dangerous but didn't outlaw because it was too expensive to switch to the better product. About how they had started to become sick, about how her father had to leave work because he was having trouble with his lungs.

About how, when she was seven, she had been washing up for dinner in her room. About how she heard a big clang from the kitchen and ran down there. About her father's dying face, clutching his throat in agony. About how her mother had choked out her last words, "Don't let her see," to her sister who was there for dinner and locked herself and her dying husband in the kitchen. About how Future had screamed and tried to get to them. About the last message from her father, Morse code on the door for _I love you, Futurina. _

The Capitol had been mad at her, but they had quickly forgotten with what I had released.

When we got to District Thirteen, Future had finally found the place she belonged again, and she was easily accepted by the natives. Future and I had become friends when we got to District Thirteen, but she and Alecca had a special attachment, becoming best friends in the blink of an eye.

It wasn't until now that I realized how strong of an attachment Alecca had formed.

On the screen, Future was smiling as Caesar Flickerman raised her hand to the crowd at the end of the interview.

"Is that Future?"

Alecca quickly pressed a button, bringing it to a screen with updates on Districts.

"Uh, hey, Drew. What are you doing here?" Alecca swirled around in his chair, a guilty look on his handsome face.

"Your suit for the wedding. Cinna wanted me to drop it by. Now, was that Futrina Cabello?" I sat down in my rolling chair and rolled over to where Alecca was, bumping him out of the way so that I could get to the mouse and go back to the picture.

"What are you talking about?" Alecca took the mouse back.

"You like Future?"

"What?" Alecca blushed, "Uh, no. It's Future. We're just friends."

"You really like her?" I laughed.

"No, no, I don't. I was just, a doing research."

"Research?"

"For a video, you know? Rama was talking about making one for Future, and I thought I'd help her out."

"Really? I thought that aired _a month ago_."

"Well," Alecca began to stutter, "It _did_, didn't it?"

"You can admit it, Alecca. It's not a _crime _to have a crush on Future."

"I do not have a _crush._ I might like someone in a romantic way. But I do not have a _crush_." Alecca quickly objected, which made me laugh even harder.

"_Like someone in a romantic way_?"

"Shut up."

"Hey, I hate crushes. I had a crush on Oaklea and look where I am now," I raised my hands in surrender.

_**XXXXX**_

"Drew?"

I looked around to see the beautiful bride smiling at me.

_Annie._

Annie Odair actually.

Yes, Annie wasn't exactly a person you could easily become friends with.

But, when you both succumb into madness thanks to President Snow, you find that you have a lot to talk about.

While my madness had mostly drifted away, only seizing me in my moments alone where the pain of Oaklea being gone is too much to take, Annie and I still get along as we did before. Annie and I had helped each other with the madness. While I had more success than she did, she had still benefited from the bit of sanity I could give her.

"Oh my God! You look so beautiful, Annie!" I smiled, and I realized that it had nothing to do with the make-up or the pretty dress. And it had everything to do with her pure happiness, her unbelievable love for Finnick.

"Look at you! I love your dress. Much more comfortable than mine. I thought Cinna said he would make this dress comfortable," Annie shook her head at the wedding gown that Cinna had made for her, "Beautiful, yes. Comfortable, no."

"At least you're not wearing these," I pointed down to the heels I had been forced to wear since Alecca was so much taller than me and basically my date for the evening.

Annie was about to say something when her new husband suddenly appeared, wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her close.

"If it isn't Miss Ilium," Finnick smiled.

After becoming basically Annie's only friend around here, Finnick had taken a special liking to me, treating me as the daughter he hadn't had, even stepping in occasionally to break Oaklea and me apart if he thought we were getting too close. I tried to mind, but Finnick's smile was so dazzling that I could barely think straight.

"Hey, Finnick."

"I saw your interview, still in love with that little Capitol boy I see."

"We can't all be as lucky as Annie and marry a god like you, Finnick. And, yes, I still love him."

"Did you just admit to loving him, Drew?" Annie smiled, knowing how hesitant I was to say those words.

_I love you._

So simple.

So powerful.

So dangerous.

"I think I did," I nodded.

Finnick smiled like a father does when he says, _Oh our baby girl is growing up_.

"I better get going. I can't trust Robin not to start a dance off. Congratulations to the two of you," I smiled, and the happy couple nodded, letting me go.

Without hesitation, I walked right over to Alecca, who was shaking his head at something I could figure out.

"Promise me that, at your wedding, Coin doesn't try to dance again," he said as soon as I took my spot leaning on the wall beside him.

"Who says I'd ever get married?"

"You maybe not. But Oaklea is the husband type. I give it three years before you two are married."

"If he is even back in three years. This war could last for much longer than that."

"True," Alecca nodded, sipping at some drink.

"And, anyway, Robin and I have had a deal since we were little. He gets married first so he can tell me what I'm in store for, and, considering he won't even _kiss_ the girl," I motioned towards Skye, "I think I have a long way to go before I can tie the knot."

Alecca smiled as he sipped some more at his drink.

"What about you? Ever think you'll get married?"

"I've never really thought about it," Alecca admitted, "I guess I probably will. You know, after the war, I'm thinking of leaving District Thirteen."

"What? You love District Thirteen," I turned to look at him.

"I know, but I don't love this," he motioned towards the party, "The politics. The propos. And I can see that that is what District Thirteen is heading towards."

"But, where will you go?"

"I was thinking about District Four. Or maybe Six. Maybe even Seven. I just don't want to be here forever," Alecca shook his head.

"Does this have anything to do with the fact that Future is going to leave after the war? Or can I flatter myself that you would miss your best friend and want to follow me when I went home."

"Maybe," Alecca nudged me, "And I highly doubt you'd ever go home to District Twelve."

"Why not?"

"You never seemed to like it there."

"What are you talking about?"

"None of you and your family seem to miss it. Maybe they miss fresh air or not having to follow all these schedules. But you don't really miss it. District Twelve is just full of sadness. And there are plenty of other districts were you can start fresh. Where Oaklea and Skye are going," Alecca nudged me again, and I couldn't help but turn to the unflattering shade of a tomato.

I couldn't help but think of what he had said.

I had never considered not going home. Not getting back to the only place I had ever really known.

But I had never really thought of it.

I had never thought of where Oaklea was going, or where Skye would want to raise her daughter. I had never thought of where I would want to retreat to.

Did I really want to come home from a war to a bunch of ashes? To a war-broken District Twelve? To the pain that I had known there?

I was still thinking this over when I saw red flash by.

"Hey, Guys. Hiding out?" Future asked as she pushed her red hair out of her eyes.

"Uh…" Alecca began to stammer.

"Nah, just making fun of Coin's dance moves."

Future smiled at me as Alecca tried to get his words back together.

"You look really good, Future," Alecca finally said.

"Thanks," Future smiled wide.

Great, _another_ couple head over heels for each other who just won't get together.

"Hey, Alecca, didn't you say that your mom taught you the waltz?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Future, didn't you say you wanted to learn the waltz?"

"I guess so…" Future tried to think of a time where she had said that.

"Alecca, do you think you could teach her?"

"Uh, sure."

Future smiled at him, and he led her off to the floor, motioning that he'd kill me later.

I couldn't help but get a little jealous though.

Of all of them as the slow song played.

Of Annie and Finnick.

Alecca and Future.

Even Peeta and Katniss, though I knew how screwed up their relationship was.

But they were here.

And Oaklea wasn't.

I gripped onto a nearby chair as I tried to block out the madness, which I could feel creeping around me.

Not here.

Not now.

My insanity wasn't too bad. I didn't do anything crazy, but it was what I thought.

It was a torture that only President Snow could be evil enough to inflict. It stretched down to my earliest memory, and it weeded through every happy time and brought me the horrible memories. It brought me the pain. It brought me the suffering.

And it brought me into the memories.

It made me feel that panic as I knew that they were going to kill me and Oaklea in the arena.

It made me feel the despair of my mother's death.

It made me feel the salty tears stream down my face as I found out that Oaklea hadn't been recovered.

It made me feel the hollowness in my stomach after finding out that little Mazy, the girl I used to babysit back home, had died in an attack on the Pharmacy before the Capitol had found out that my family had escaped in time. Mazy had just been there to pick up a doll she had left in my room when the gas poisoned her. And it was all my fault.

"Drew?"

I felt my sanity pull over the madness as a voice brought me back to the regular world.

"Oh, Peeta, hey," I lessened my grip on the chair and stood up straight.

"Care for a dance?" he held out his hand, smiling like the friend he was.

"What about you and Katniss? It looked like you guys were starting to work some things out. And, if this is for the cameras, they would much rather see you with Katniss."

"You were the girl in my life long before Katniss even knew who I was. Now, stop moping and dance."

I took his hand, and, as Peeta had before at our mandatory school dances, he swooped me around the dance floor in his not-so-slow slow dance.

It was nice to feel like I was normal again.

Or as normal as I ever was.

It was nice to feel like I was that sixteen year old again, the one who used to wake up early in the morning to prepare the pharmacy to open. The one who would have to run to school so I wouldn't be late. The one who used to be forced to go to dances and would only be danced with my two best friends while the others had learned to be scared of my older brother. The one who used to think that she would never get called for the Hunger Games.

It was nice to feel like I had gone back to when my biggest worry was how we would be able to afford certain medicines when our sales were so down.

Not that Capitol would kill my boyfriend, friends, family, and leave me to suffer through it for screwing them like I did.

"Earlier, you had that face again," Peeta whispered in my ear, "Tell me the truth. Are you really better? Or did you just fake a recovery to get out of the hospital?"

"Depends on the day, Peeta," I whispered back.

* * *

**_I just started writing and couldn't stop. But Future is finally here! And I promise that she'll play bigger role later!_**


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thanks to Futurenovelist for help with this chapter**_

* * *

_**Drew,**_

"Just to make sure it stays in place," Octavia, who had somehow become my personal stylist after Cinna went to Katniss, told me as she placed some double-sided tape on my skin and taped the other side to my dress.

Another photo shoot.

Only this time it was me with my new crew.

The dream team was disabled for now.

Skye was eight months pregnant and awaiting the birth of her daughter any time now.

And Robin was to stay with her and help her with the baby.

So, I had a new team.

Future, who I now have in the underground with me.

Alecca because I would be lost without him.

And our grown up leader, who we found out we require, Loco (like locomotives) who had been Future's mentor.

Today was our first photo shoot, which had made Alecca want to kill me.

"That should do it, Drew," Octavia smiled at me, proud of all of the work she had put into making me look like a goddess, and I tried not to take offense to that.

"Thanks," I smiled weakly at Octavia and started walking towards the redhead, who looked she was going through torture.

"Hey, Future," I smiled as I looked through all of the instruments on the work table.

I had to admit that Future looked amazing.

Her dress had looked something like what Skye would have had. It was a Cookies-and-Cream beige, with the bodice decked out in glitter and beading. The tissue bottom was long and heavy, sprouting out kind of like a cupcake. But, suddenly, it was unevenly singed off at the bottom just enough to show her combat boots.

"Hey, Drew," she smiled at me as one of the Prep-Team-Trainees began to skillfully work her red hair into a perfect up-do.

"Alecca is going to turn bright red when he sees how great you look."

Future blushed, though it was hard to tell with all of the make-up she was wearing.

"Where is he anyway?"

"Flavius took him to another room so he could change," I shrugged.

"What's up with you two?" Future rubbed her arm, nervous about the thought of her _Ice_ being taken.

Somehow, Gale had figured out the nicknames Fire and Ice. Fire for her red hair. And ice for his icy blue eyes.

"What do you mean?" I knit my eyebrows in confusion.

"Well…" Future bounced her leg like she did when she was nervous, "I mean, what's up with you two?"

"Me and Flavius?"

"No, you and Alecca. What's up with you two?"

"What's up with us?" I tried to pull myself out of the little world I sometimes went into.

"You guys are together a lot."

"Well, we work together."

"Yeah, but more than that."

"_More than that_?"

"Well…" Future trailed off, begging to bite her bottom lip, which earned her a _Tsk, Tsk_ from her Prep-Team-Trainee since she had just finished putting her lip gloss on.

"Future, just tell me," I smiled as the trainee began to apply a strongly-scented cinnamon lip gloss to Future's pink lips.

"I mean, I know you love Oaklea and everything. But do you…_like_ Alecca?"

Future bit her tongue as she came to the part that actually hurt to say.

"Or does he like _you_?"

I suddenly saw it.

Well, I saw it through her eyes.

Him visiting me in the hospital while I was still struggling with my madness. Helping me along once I got out. Leaving where he worked with her to work with me. Spending time helping me find Oaklea instead of spending his time with her like he used to… Even participating in a photo shoot for me.

She didn't know about the deal he had made with Oaklea without my knowledge so long ago to take care of me if something happened.

She didn't know that he was hopelessly in love with her.

"There's a better chance that Flavius likes me."

Future smiled, trying not to laugh.

"Don't get me wrong," I said as I started to toy with a weird eyelash thing, "I love Alecca. But like I love Robin or my brother. And, anyway it wouldn't matter…"

"What do you mean?"

"Because he is undoubtedly in love with someone else," I directed my smile at her, and, even if she didn't want to admit it, it was obvious I meant her.

She opened her mouth to say something, but the door from the hallway slid open, revealing two boys at the door.

Alecca swooped in, heading towards us, and even I had to admit that he looked like a god right now.

…And then there was Loco.

Loco was thirty-three and had the same red hair as Future, and his arms were devoured in freckles and scars. But he was still rivaling Alecca right now. He was a bad smoker, always claiming that working with all of the smoke made his lungs bad already, and he was an ex-alcoholic.

He had never killed by hand during his time in the Arena until the last tribute. He had been in love with the girl from District Five, and he was planning on killing himself so that she could win. But then it came time to go against the District One tribute. Loco killed the boy, but, with his dying breath, he shot Alyce, the girl from District Five. And Loco had to watch as Alyce died in his arms, with three painful final words, _"I love you."_

The eighteen year old drank away his pain and tried just about everything to forget Alyce.

Drinking.

Morphling.

Cigarettes.

And other such addictions.

Future had helped him kick the others, but he was determined to keep smoking, if anything to annoy Future.

"You're really making me want a cupcake, Future."

He had yet to master the art of compliments.

"I think she looks great," Alecca shook his head at Loco as he brought out another cigarette and brought it to his lips.

I smiled at Alecca for complimenting Future without having me push him to do so.

"You look adorable, Future," Loco came to wrap his arms around my waist playfully, "And you look hot, Drew."

He kissed my ear, and I pushed him off.

"Shut up, Loco."

He shrugged and went off to light up another cigarette, despite Future glaring at him.

"Why do you smell like…" Alecca stepped closer to her, "Cinnamon, Firebird?"

Future blushed.

"And why do you smell like…" she took a second to identify it, "Vanilla, Icey?"

Alecca smiled.

"So, what I am supposed to be doing again? During this photo shoot?" Alecca asked as he picked up a chair and brought it to sit beside Future, his knee just to centimeters from hers.

"Look hot."

Alecca knit his eyebrows in confusion.

"I'm supposed to look strong. You're supposed to look like you have a secret," I nodded towards Future, "And, Alecca, you're supposed to look sexy."

"How'd I get that?"

"It just happened like that," I shrugged, though I remembered that I had absent-mindly agreed with Ramma that he would be great with doing that, which she took as a go ahead to plan out what this political image would be.

"To the set!"

I instinctively ran to the stage set up, and I thanked God that Alecca didn't push that too much.

I couldn't help but glance at myself in the mirror though.

It felt like I was staring at someone else.

My hair was dull and kept in a ponytail. I always wore a frumpy white jumpsuit, and my shoes were a pair of ill-fitting combat boots that made it hard to tell if I walked funny or if the girl before me did.

But, today, my black hair was wavy and silky. I wore a navy wrap dress with a train attached from the parts of the wrap dress to lead it off, and I had un-scuffed silver arm guards. My shoes were perfect-fitting combat boots. And I looked absolutely flawless.

Future hurried to my side, with Alecca right behind her.

_**Oaklea:**_

"Is Drew Ilium getting over Oaklea Wells?" Daisy smiled into the camera, "This reporter thinks so. Drew was definitely _getting_ close with more than one boy."

Daisy raised her eyebrows as the screen faded to photos of Drew at Finnick and Annie's wedding.

The first picture was of Drew being spun around by Peeta.

Drew talking to Alecca.

Robin kissing the top of her head.

Dancing with Peeta's older brother.

"With Oaklea's recent absence, everyone expected her to be lost. But, if you ask me, I think she was doing just fine. This is Daisy Iris signing off."

I pressed a button to turn off the TV screen in the limo, and I looked back to the Capitol streets I used to call home.

How?

With all of they had seen, how did they only focus on Drew dancing with a few guys?

It all disgusted me.

It wasn't the pictures.

Well, okay, maybe the one with her ex-boyfriend, who everyone had expected her to one day marry, did make me a little sick.

But I was fine, happy about it even. I didn't want her sitting around crying like I wanted to.

Yet the Capitol citizens get to judge her on having fun while I've been kidnapped?

With everything she stands for, all of pain, they choose to focus on the _guys _in her life.

They saw all of that. Out of Annie and Finnick's wedding, they have so much to say. Such an important and true message. But they choose to report on Drew dancing with other guys and smiling, putting their little spin on it.

"They have to report on something, Oaklea," Nicolt patted my leg comfortingly, "And they can't say the truth."

I nodded, though I really wasn't listening.

"You miss her a lot, huh?" Nicolt smiled weakly, and I nodded.

"She just told me she loved me," I dug my nails into my wrist, trying to seem fine.

I couldn't get upset.

I had gotten in trouble last night, and I couldn't handle a repeat of that.

"You loved her, too?"

I smiled weakly, deciding that I had to tell someone eventually.

"I was going to propose."

Nicolt looked at me, surprise on her surgically-altered face.

"What?"

"I asked her dad if I could propose on her birthday."

"But… you're not engaged?"

"I never said he would _let_ me."

"What'd he say?" Nicolt turned to look at me, her rainbow eyes wide.

"He made a joke about how he always imagined it'd be a Mallark asking to marry Drew. And he told me that he knew I was good to Drew, that I loved her, that I'd take care of her. But he wouldn't let me propose."

"Why not?"

"He wouldn't be able to happy about it, you know. Because she was still his baby girl. And Drew wouldn't be able to enjoy any of it if her father wasn't happy about the match and everything. So, he told me to wait until we weren't minors."

I shrugged, and Nicolt continued to stare at me.

She wasn't like a lot of the Capitol people. Being held in a Capitol prison had changed all that, but there were Capitol things that were just implanted in you. Sometimes, I even found it in myself.

And the Capitol people had a thing for love triangles.

And, once the triangle was gone, they believed that the drama was enough for them. They should be left alone to be together.

And we weren't left alone.

Before Nicolt could start talking about how unfair things were for me and Drew, the limo lurched to a stop, and the door slid open.

Nicolt, snapping out of it, quickly added a layer of green-apple-scented lip gloss to her owl-print lips, and she pulled me out the limo door, with my security guards waiting for me outside. I wasn't sure if they were there to protect me from the Capitol people or protect the Capitol people from me.

Either way, as a group, we started moving towards the TV station, where I was supposed to have an interview about Rose.

I thought about my script.

_Don't talk about Drew. Or the wedding. Or the rebels._

_Talk about reality TV show episode I'm in that premieres soon._

_Mention break-up with girlfriend, don't give many details._

_And shrug like it could happen but hadn't happened yet when Caesar askes me if I am an "item" with Rose._

Rose Monroe.

Was there anyone I hated more?

I wasn't sure.

"Hey, Cutie."

I froze, which made a security guard almost run into me.

"Hey, Psycho."

Rose waved off my security guards, who listened to her, but Nicolt didn't move.

If it was possible, she hated Rose more than I did.

_If_ it was possible.

As I looked at Rose, I saw that she had an interview, too.

When I had known Rose, she was just a pretty girl in school, who was a little too stuck up considering her "rank". My friends and I always thought she needed a wake-up call, calling her _Midnight_ because the sun would never seem to wake her up from her delusion.

But her "rank" had come to meet her snobby ways.

Thanks to a few doctors and a good stylist, she had suddenly looked like a natural beauty. She had become famous overnight, earning her hot parties and even hotter famous boyfriends. She didn't actually _do_ anything though. She didn't sing or act or report. She was just famous for being famous.

Today, she looked like she was known for.

Her faux-blonde hair was wavy and blown out around her. Her long legs were shown-off by her barely there red mini skirt, and her platform heels added about three inches to her height, making her almost my height. And her strappy white top showed too much skin.

"You ready to proclaim your love for me, just like you did with your little _girlfriend,_" she laughed.

I resisted the urge to strangle her.

"That's not today, Rose," Nicolt answered for me.

Rose shrugged.

"But you're not saying you _don't_ love me."

"I wish I could. It'd be the only truthful thing in this interview."

Rose pouted.

"So, I heard Daisy practicing a piece before she settled on the thing about Drew cheating on you… she was talking about how she thought Drew was pregnant," Rose smiled devilishly, "Did little Oakie get _the Strong One_ knocked up?"

"She's not pregnant."

"How do you know?" Rose asked as she reached for a bottle of water to take her little green pill, _Buzz,_ "She may of just not told you. Or she may of not even know. You could be a dad for all you know."

"She's _not pregnant_."

"How do you kn-" Rose stopped as realization came to her, "You mean you two haven't…?"

Rose began to laugh as she walked over to get a Champaign flute from a table in the distance.

"Ignore her," Nicolt smiled up at me.

"Wouldn't have it any other way."

"Beaumont Winston to the stage!" a voice I didn't recognize yelled through the intercom.

_**Drew:**_

"Drew, settle this for us. Which is better, a gun or a sword?" Alecca asked me as soon as I sat down at our table.

"A gun is a million times better!" Future told him as she ate a spoonful of some weird green mash.

"No, a _sword_ is. It's more-"

"Dangerous for you. Shoot and get it over with."

"But that's so-"

Alecca stopped mid-sentence as he noticed that I was just watching them, almost laughing.

"Uh, what do you think, Drew?" Alecca slid back to his original seat after they had proceeded to get closer and closer to each other every time they continued their banter.

"Future's right," I shrugged as I purposely avoided the green mash, which I'm pretty sure I saw moving on my plate, "Gun's better. Gets it over with."

"Ha," Future nudged him.

Alecca rolled his eyes as he dug right in to the food, obviously not seeing the problems I saw with my meal.

"Hey, has Skye come in today? I haven't seen her since breakfast, and she's always the first one to lunch, saying she's starving," I asked as I looked around the room.

It was usually easy to find Skye.

Aside from being the most beautiful girl here, she was about nine months pregnant.

"I haven't seen her," Future shrugged as she continued to eat, and I looked through the cafeteria once more.

I could see most everyone.

Loco talking with Haymitch about how much they miss alcohol.

Katniss with her group.

The other tributes.

My family.

Pretty much everyone.

But no Skye. No Robin. And not the Wells either.

I immediately began to worry for Skye.

Skye and I weren't actually related, but she was like the little sister I never had, even if she was older than me. Skye had always been a little fragile, which I guess is understandable since she is pregnant and such. But, when Oaklea went missing, everything just kind of piled up inside her. Her husband dying, her daughter never getting to meet her father, _and_ her brother being kidnapped. These days, she's porcelain.

"You okay, Drew?"

I turned back to Future, who was staring at me.

"Uh, yeah, just thinking."

"She's probably just caught up in her knitting and forgot the time," Alecca tried.

Her knitting.

God, I sometimes wish I had never told Annalisa that she wanted to learn how to knit.

Skye was put on maternity leave while we're waiting for her baby to be born, and she quickly got tired of having nothing to do. So, when Annalisa taught her how to knit, it was her saving grace. By the end of her first day knitting, she had knit a sweater for her, a baby blanket, and a bunch of little pink socks.

And the pile had grown and grown everyday, even earing me a huge blanket with 'Drew' written in the center.

"You're right," I nodded as I picked at the soup.

And then it happened.

"Drew!"

I looked around to see Robin running through the cafeteria, even jumping over someone who got down to tie his shoes, to get to me.

"Robin?"

"Skye-" Robin stopped to breathe, "Is-"

More breathing.

"Skye is…?" I jumped up from the table, waiting for him to form his words.

"She 's-"

More breathing.

"Do you need to sit down?" Alecca asked.

Robin quickly shook his head.

"Drew, you have to-" deep breath, "come with me."

"Where?"

"The Hospital!"

I froze.

"She's?"

"Yes!"

"Taylor?"

"In a few hours!"

This time I was the one hyperventilating and running.


	7. Soldier Illium

_**Drew:**_

I rocked the baby, trying to coax her into sleep again.

_Taylor Andrewlisa Wells._

_Taylor _for her late father.

_Andrewlisa_ for her grandfather…and secretly me.

Taylor was exactly one day old, with her mother still sleeping in the hospital bed from the painful birth, and I had to admit that she was the cutest baby I had ever seen.

She looked like she was Taylor's sister, not her daughter. Aside from little differences that she had inherited from her father, Taylor was like a clone of her mother. She had light blue eyes and curly blonde hair. Her face was absolutely perfect, like God had taken years to plan how beautiful she would be. And she was a quiet little baby, having had slept for most of her twenty-four hours of life.

Most everyone had left already, all to get some sleep.

And I had taken over the shift of taking care of the baby and waiting for the mother to awaken.

"Hmm," Taylor told me, which I took as she didn't want to go to sleep.

"Okay, I might as well start spoiling you now before Robin gets started," I kissed the top of her head and continued to rock her as I turned on the TV.

For the short time that Skye had been awake, I had expected her to cry, but she had just smiled.

I had expected her to realize the horrible things. Like her father being dead. Or being born in a war zone. Or her mother being so young that she may not be a good mother to her.

But, in reality, that was really wrong.

She may never meet the father who was part of her DNA, but she had more than enough dad's. Robin and her grandfather were waiting around for the call, and Oaklea would be lining up for it as soon as he met the little girl. This _was_ a war zone, but little Taylor was protected. And there were people all around to help raise little Taylor.

Taylor giggled as she wrapped her hand around my pinky.

And then the TV show switched.

I was so wrapped up in playing with the infant that I didn't notice it until I heard a familiar voice.

_Oaklea's voice._

"So, Beaumont, everyone has been seeing you out with Rose Monroe. How is your girlfriend reacting to this?" Caesar Flickerman smiled into the camera, which felt unnatural and made me a little sick.

"I…um, I don't know," Beaumont-or Oaklea- ran his hand through his sandy blonde hair.

The camera did a close-up on Caesar raising his powderpink eyebrows as if to ask what he meant by that.

"ViVi and I broke up."

Everyone in the TV station audience 'aw'ed, and I continued to stare, which puzzled the little infant in my arms.

"There's your Uncle Oaklea, Taylor," I moved the baby where she could see the TV screen, and she stared at it.

"Where's my little girl?"

I looked up, which made Taylor look from the TV screen to her mother in the hospital bed.

"You're up?"

"And you've got my baby," Skye smiled, pulling herself up to sit.

I stood up and hurried over to Skye, handing her Taylor.

"She looks like Taylor," Skye smiled as she rocked the baby in her arms, making her blue eyes start to close in slumber.

"She looks like a clone of you, Skye," I laughed as I sat in the chair beside the bed.

She smiled at that.

"How has she been while I was asleep?"

"Like a little angel."

Skye smiled as she looked down to her daughter.

"She's going to miss her Aunt Drew," she pushed her hair out of her blue eyes, which were closed as she slept.

I looked up to Skye, shocked.

"How did you know?"

Skye's smile widened.

"You know, for years, I always used my good looks to make boys dumb. But I didn't know how powerful being a hormonal, possibly homicidal pregnant woman could be."

I smiled, though I was imaging how I'd kill Alecca.

"Do you have to go, Drew?"

I nodded.

"I can't explain why, but…" I trailed off.

"I know, Drew," Skye's smile faded, "I just wish you could stay."

I got up from sitting on the chair to hug her, which meant I was also hugging Taylor in the process.

"I'm going to miss you, Skye," I kissed the top of her head.

"Try to stay out of trouble. Just try."

"And you take care of this baby here, and give Robin a chance," I told her as I sat down again, "I know things may not be perfect here. But he loves you, and I think you may love him."

Skye smiled, and, before she could say anything, the door opened.

"You're up."

I turned around to see Robin smiling.

"I'm going to go get some sleep. Bye, you guys."

I kissed the top of my goddaughter's head and hugged Skye one last time before whispering to Robin on my way out.

"Kiss her, you idiot."

Robin smiled at me as he watched me leave, and I stopped to sign out.

As I turned back, I almost awed.

Through the large window, I could see Robin kiss the top of Skye's head and play with Taylor.

_They'll be fine_, I told myself.

And it was good that I knew that.

Because I had a new team to protect, and I needed to direct my efforts to that…And to my new station.

In District Nine, where the war is raging…

_**Oaklea:**_

I picked at my food, French Toast and fried eggs, while the latest of President Snow's beautiful "friends" who came to breakfast and got in a limo to go home right after continued to jabber on about what a big fan of Rose she was and if we were dating or not.

With every question, I just took a sip of the spiced orange juice and shrugged with a small smile.

"Good morning," a beautiful politician swept into the breakfast room and took her spot beside the girl, whose name I had quickly forgotten.

"Good morning, Ivy," President Snow nodded towards the green-ish girl.

"May I speak to you?" Ivy asked as one of the servants brought her an orange juice.

"Of course," President Snow seemed happy to get away from his latest hook-up, and he stood, "Beaumont, you are excused."

I happily pushed my plate away and stood while Nicolt quickly finished chewing her pancakes and stood up.

As President Snow went with Ivy Leviane, Nicolt wrapped her arm around my bicep.

"Goodbye, Reselle. I've got to get Beaumont here to his prep team," Nicolt nodded towards the pretty redhead at the table.

"Oh of course, I better get going," she pushed her ruby red hair behind her ear, "It was so wonderful to meet you, Beaumont."

"You, too."

She blushed as she nodded towards me and started to head towards the door, where she could quickly scurried out towards where the limo would be waiting to take her wherever she said it should go.

"Why is every girl in love with you, Oakie?" Nicolt smiled up at me, and I shrugged.

"Ask my prep team."

Nicolt steered me towards one of the spare bedrooms, where Isis was waiting to redye my hair.

Few people were allowed to know I was, and none of my prep team was on the list. So, Isis had to be the one to dye my hair, and it couldn't be in the prep team either.

Nicolt knocked on the door gently.

"Isis?" she whispered at the door.

_Nothing_.

"Isis?" she spoke louder.

_Still nothing_.

"Isis?" Nicolt banged on the door.

A moan.

"Hold on a minute," Nicolt told me as she jimmied the door open and pushed herself through, leaving me in the hallway.

"What?"

I spun around to the large door behind me.

President Snow.

I hurried to the door.

"The baby was born, and she had nothing to keep her in District Thirteen. She has a team, and she'll be deployed in a few weeks."

"Do you have any idea all of the problems she'll cause. Renewed hope. Better conditions. And she'll be such a good soldier that she'll inspire! Political aspect or not!" President Snow's voice was moving around, telling me that he was pacing.

"With her, she has their star soldier. Soldier Evaine."

_Alecca._

"Evaine? Like that movie star who went mad and ran off into the jungle with some guy."

"The one and only. They got to District Thirteen and had a son. He went by his mother's last name in the military as not to get special treatment because of his father. And then there is Futurina Cabello."

_Future._

"The District Six tribute?"

"Better known as _Traffic Cone_," Ivy's laugh was loud and high-pitched, running chills down my spine.

I heard a loud _clank_ as President Snow began to move classes around and chug a few drinks.

"Want one?"

"Or two."

They both drank before saying anything.

"I can get the drones out there. She'll be dead in a matter of weeks, President."

"They figured them out, remember? And we can't give the Rebels a martyr. And think of _him_…"

_Him?_

Who was_ him?_

Why would Katniss come out with Alecca and Future? And who would have a problem with it?

Or was it our Mockingjay?

"She's fair game now."

I could feel Ivy's icy smile forming.

"I'd love to get out there and kill her myself."

"It'll be hard to kill her. Remember the last time we tried? Even before her guards got to protect her, she had killed an entire team."

Across the hall, I could hear a hung over Isis moan again, complaining about Nicolt making her put on clothes.

President Snow said one last thing before the other door swung open, revealing the golden Isis and Nicolt beside her.

"Hmm," Isis took the few steps to put her golden tinted hand in my hair to see the color.

Isis.

She had been in my prep team when I was in the Hunger Games, and she had only survived because she went to work as the President's Stylist before they started the abductions.

When I had known her, she had prided herself in never drinking. Now, she was a drunk. She never would explain why, but I think it had something to do with the golden wedding band that she wore with _Roman_ engraved on the inside. And the fact that he was dead.

Isis was pretty, I guess.

Her hair was the color of gold, as were her eyes. Her skin had been painted the same, and she wore clothes that were the same reflective yellow as everything else about her.

"I can see the black underneath," she continued to run her fingers through my hair, "Snow would die if he saw this. Come on."

She quickly wrapped her hands around my arms and pulled me in the direction of her room.

Ever since Roman's death, she had hated the Capitol, which meant she loved me.

But I couldn't think of my relief to see Isis.

I could only think of those words I had heard.

"_Drew Illium," President Snow laughed, whiskey heavy on his voice, "First, the daughter of a shopkeeper. Then _The Strong One_. Then the most hated girl in the Capitol…Now a soldier."_

_**Drew:**_

Annalisa's big green eyes began to water as she looked at me.

As a child, I had always wanted to look like her.

She was beautiful and sort of exotic for District Twelve.

Her hair was brown-almost-blonde and the color was never dull like mine. Her lips were a natural pink-red which meant she never needed lipstick. Our eyes were the same green instead of our dad's grey, and her skin was either always perfectly tanned or wonderful porcelain. Plastic surgeons in the Capitol were always trying to take credit for the perfect slope of her nose, and her lips were thick and perfectly sculpted like people in the capitol paid big money to get.

"I love you, Drew," her thin arms wrapped around me tightly as she pulled me close.

"I love you, too, Lisa," I smiled into her curly hair.

"You be good. And be safe. And don't cause trouble-"

"Annalisa, I know," I smiled at her, "It's going to be fine. I'll be home before you know it."

Annalisa pushed my hair out of my eyes, not convinced.

"Why do you have to do this?"

I didn't have an answer for that one.

I knew this was dumb. I mean, I was the most girl by the Capitol, and there were more than enough people who wanted me dead. I had a family, friends, even a little goddaughter that needed me here. That needed me alive.

But I just…had to go.

"I can't explain it, Annlisa," I shrugged.

"Well, she'll be the best soldier out there."

I smiled thanks at my brother, who wore a new silver wedding band after his wedding yesterday, something that we had sped up so I could be here for it.

His black hair was perfectly groomed, and his skin was tan. His lips formed a smile, and he had even found a way to look good in the frumpy white jumpsuit we all had to wear. But his grey eyes had never been happier since he had said 'I do' to Lillian, the girl he had been in love with before I was even born.

"I'm not sure about that, Jonah. Alecca's coming with me."

Jonah smiled at the thought of Alecca, who he knew would protect me.

"I'm going to miss you, Squirt," he pulled me close and kissed the top of my head.

"You, too, Big Foot."

He smiled into my hair as he let me go.

And then came the hard one.

I had said goodbye to Robin last night, when he helped me pack my stuff, and I had said goodbye to Skye yesterday while I was helping with Taylor. But I hadn't spoken to my dad yet. He had taken me going to war hard, and I didn't want to make it any worse by rubbing it in.

"Drew," my father smiled as he looked me over, trying to remember that I wasn't a little five year old girl playing dress-up.

"Dad," my eyes watered as I hugged him.

It was hard not to cry though.

His warmth enveloped me in the cold waiting area, and his lips were planted on the top of my head as he kissed me. My dad's salty tears ran down my face, and he held me tightly like he used to when I'd wake up crying after mom died.

When my mother died, I realized that my dad needed me. And, as much as I could, I made sure that I was there for him.

This was the first time that I was willingly going.

"Stay safe."

Even though people had told me that a million times, it only really sunk in this time.

"I know, Dad."

As he let me go, he brushed my hair out of my eyes again and made a remark like only a dad could about how I needed a haircut.

"Keep Alecca in line," my dad smiled.

"Make sure Robin doesn't do anything insane."

"I can't promise anything."

I smiled at him one last time as I noticed Alecca walking in with Future.

"I better get going," I nodded towards Future and Alecca.

"Of course," my dad nodded, trying to look proud of me, but I knew he was worried too much to think about that.

I nodded goodbye to Annalisa and Jonah one more time before swinging my backpack over my shoulder and starting to walk over to my friends.

I hadn't predicted how much it would hurt.

When I had been called in The Reaping, I was being _taken _away. But, today, I was _walking_ away. I was choosing to leave my family and friends behind to join President Snow's games and kill people from other districts.

I had never been the brave one. I had always hung back, putting my family over things like this. I had never even thought to be the hero, I just wanted to make ends meet and make sure that my family was being taken care of.

But, today, I had chosen to be the hero.

I had chosen to be the hero that probably didn't come home.

"You okay, Drew?" Future laced her arm through mine as we walked towards the hanger, where our transport waited to take us to District Nine.

"Yeah," I lied.

"Come on, Girls. We better wait to talk until we're on the transport. Don't want to run out of things to talk about."

Alecca smiled, which made us smile no matter how much I wanted to tell him to shut up.

"I think you're taking _General Evaine_ too seriously, Alecca," Future bumped her hip against his, which made him slightly blush and smile at the same time, "We don't have to follow your orders yet."

"Like you two would ever do as I say."

"He's got a point."

Future smiled at me.


	8. The Jabberjay Takes Flight

_**Oaklea,**_

Rose's unnaturally red lips formed a pout as she watched the news.

It was supposed to be "Shopping with Rose! At ten am!" this morning, but one face had dominated the news today.

A face that was ridiculed when, just a few months ago, they loved her.

Drew Ilium.

_The Strong One._

No one around here _liked_ the _Mockingjay_, but the hatred they had around here for _The Strong One_ was astounding. It was almost like they actually knew what was going on outside of their sheltered world and cared about it.

Almost.

But, in reality, she was just a face to put on the _Wanted_ posters.

She was a girl who had gained their trust. Worn their expensive clothes. Captured their hearts with her stories of a deceased mother and having to work in the store. Intrigued them with an alliance with the boy they were supposed to hate. Even farther, she had grown an attachment to him and his little sister, which would give them some drama later to watch. And then dropped it all to become a Rebel.

But here she was once more.

This was probably the first time that a newscaster had a piece on Drew without talking about her clothes or if she looked pale or not.

Today, they had their star reporter on the scene, confirming the rumors of Drew Ilium joining the army.

This morning, my alarm rang, but the itinerary didn't pop up. Nor did my timer telling me how long I had to get ready before I was in trouble. Instead, a completely sober Isis, which was weird all in itself, was shaking me awake and telling me to get up. Still in my pajamas, I came into the living room, where Rose was sitting, or who I was told was Rose.

Without her make-up and expensive clothes, I couldn't tell who was sitting on the couch.

"What did your girlfriend do?" Rose spat at me, ignoring the little green pill she had taken out of her purse, which meant this was serious.

"Get high and shut up," I didn't even look back at her.

I continued to stare at the screen.

How could Alecca let her do this?

He had promised her that she would be kept out of danger? And where is she?

In the most dangerous place on earth!

Rose looked at me indigently, but she did what I said by popping the little green pill in and chugging it down with a vanilla-flavored coffee.

"Shut up," Rose tried to seem mad, but _Buzz_ had completed the signature mellow that Rose had made her name by.

She was a beautiful, fun-loving, calm teenage girl. And that was what the public liked her as.

So, in her eyes, if she wanted to keep the spotlight, she had to stay drugged.

A few months ago, I would have felt sorry for her.

But not now.

For now, I stared at the "accidentally" leaked picture of Drew with Future and Alecca.

This wasn't professionally taken. It was just Drew with her friends, like she was any other teenage girl who wanted to remember how happy she was in a picture to keep forever. Or to brag to other people.

Drew had her long black hair tied behind her back in a ponytail, and she wore the frumpy grey soldier's uniform. Alecca looked like he was trying to remain like a superior general, but he just couldn't do it. And Future looked like Future, blushing to the shade of her red hair since Alecca's hand was on hers.

They sat together, with Drew in the middle, their arms around each other as they smiled into the camera. You could tell they had been laughing and that they really were friends instead of just some team that was put together for political purposes. But, despite how hard they tried, they didn't look happy.

Or at least not to me, not when I had seen them all truly happy.

They knew what they were doing, and they knew what a risk it was.

And, then, right as the reporter was opening his mouth to say something, the TV clicked off.

I looked back to see President Snow looking all of us.

"It's your turn."

I instantly knew what he meant.

As the Prep Team filed in, carrying all sort of armor, my eyes never left President Snow.

"Let's get started, shall we?" President Snow was talking to the Prep Team, but his icy glare stayed glued to me.

_**Drew,**_

"I call top bunk."

"No problem there," I threw my heavy backpack down on the thin mattress.

Across the room, Alecca showing his military roots by using his downtime to get a feel of the war around here. The room was technically separated for women soldiers and men, but the wall which could slide across was always held back from what I could tell. And Future and I were basically the only women here. They had already moved on to another district since this place was basically wrapped up.

It felt weird to see Alecca like this.

This was his element.

Like he had been raised just for this.

…Well, he _had_.

As I sat down on the bed, I could see where soldiers had taken a pocket knife and etched their names into the metal.

How many names where there?

Fourteen at least.

I tried not to think of how many of those fourteen were probably still alive today.

I glanced toward Alecca, who was too busy to notice if the building had caught fire, and I fished through my bag for a knife.

_Drew Ilium_

I underlined my name, knowing that there was now something of me for number sixteen who would have this bed after me.

I slid out of the bed and looked up to Future.

"I'm going to go check out the grounds."

"No, you're not."

I jumped as I turned back to see Alecca.

"Both of you, come on."

Future glared down at him.

"Please come down," Alecca tried again.

Future smiled as she climbed down from her top bunk.

"Thank you, Alecca."

Alecca began to mumble something about four years of working his way into the military and how it would all go down the drain because two girls would ruin his reputation as a fearless leader, but I didn't really pay too much attention to that. Instead, I followed him out of the chamber and came to follow him out to the field.

The grain had all been destroyed by the Capitol, which was basically death itself. But, with their soldiers moving in, they were already supposed to be dead. But then we came along. And it was clear that we had basically won this region by now since most of the soldiers were now being shipped off to the next district to "defend" it against the Rebels.

People moved around, all knowing exactly where to go.

Including the blonde walking towards us.

"General Evaine," the blonde smiled, and I saw Future's face grow hard.

"Sesame? I thought you had been moved on to District Eight," Alecca smiled, and even I got mad for Future.

As they continued to jabber on like old friends, Future and I looked towards each other.

Finally, I stepped on Alecca's toe.

"Ow, why'd you-" Alecca stopped and blushed when he realized it.

Sesame's face fell as she noticed Future and me for the first time.

"This are my friends. Drew Ilium," he nodded towards me, and, as always, his smile grew as he looked to Future, "And Futurina Cabello. Guys, this is Sesame Maroon. She moved to District Thirteen when we were thirteen. We're old friends."

Sesame's face grew hard at "_friends_".

Sesame was in no way ugly. Her hair was the color of wheat, and her eyes were chocolate brown. Sesame's skin was a dark tan, but there was a layer of dark dust on her from the ashes that used to be the grain blowing in the wind. She was average height. She was thinly built, being mostly muscle instead of anything else, and she had that look permanently etched into her face.

That look you could only get from years of hardship when you had been accustomed to a normal life.

"Of course, I was supposed to come and welcome you," her gaze washed over Future, who rolled her eyes.

"Well, hi," Future told her sarcastically, and I resisted the urge to high-five her.

"I'm Drew."

"Sesame," she nodded towards me, still watching Future.

It was like a silent-stand-off between the two girls, reminding each other that only one could win the illustrious heart of Alecca Evaine-Baxley.

Neither of them seemed to understand that he had made his choice a long time ago…

"Um, I was about to take them to the shooting range," Alecca finally spoke up, his voice showing just how scared of this moment he was.

Now it's serious when even _Alecca_ can notice it.

"I'll come," Sesame smiled towards Alecca, showing a surprisingly sunny attitude when it came to him.

"Of course you will," Future rolled her eyes, and Alecca pretended not to hear.

As the group started to move that way, I fell to the back, and, while Sesame and Future were making every effort to look away from each other, I pulled Alecca back.

"I'm your superior, remember, Drew? Can you at least try to act like I'm in charge of you," Alecca nudged me, making me roll my eyes.

"I've heard that for the last six hours on the ride here. Is it not obvious I won't?"

Alecca tried to seem angry, but his smile gave him away.

"So, how long have you known Sesame?" I nodded towards the blonde.

"A few years," Alecca shrugged, "We were friends in school."

"And how long has she been in love with you?"

Alecca looked at me.

"What are you talking about it?"

"It's more obvious than you with Future, Alecca," I nudged him.

"We've been friends forever. I mean, we're like you and Robin."

"Maybe to _you_."

Alecca's face paled as he thought it over.

"Whoa, whoa," he pulled me back by my arm, "But wouldn't you know if Robin felt like that for you?"

So, he's been thinking about this a lot, huh?

"Yeah," I nodded, "And she _does_."

"You're screwed," I hip-bumped him and walked up to join the other girls, leaving Alecca to become as pale as a ghost behind me.

_**Oaklea,**_

"Want a drink?"

Rose, being without drugs for the first time in months, seemed tired without them. Washed out, even.

She had been hitting her stash so much recently that she was already out.

"Yeah."

I was surprised at myself.

Did I just say yes?

Rose handed me the Champaign flute, and I basically inhaled it as she fished a box of cigarettes out of her purse.

"You ready?" she nodded towards the packed square as she used her gold lighter to light the cigarette between her lips.

"I'll be fine," she shrugged as she stood up to the full-length mirror and began to fiddle with her gold dress.

I decided against pushing the issue for now.

Instead, I spent the majority of my time trying to find a way of sitting in this armor that didn't hurt.

It was a prototype.

The real one would be done for the photo shoot tomorrow, but, for now, I was stuck in this.

I couldn't tell what I was supposed to be.

The chainmail draped over my chest had a medieval feel to it. The boots were modern. And the pattern engraved in the armor seemed to be wings of a Jabberjay.

I felt like a red hot mess in metal.

Rose, on the other hand, looked the same, only sweeter.

Her lips were pink instead of her trademark red. Her faux-blonde hair was piled up in a bun on her head, and, once again, the stylist had tried to make a girl look like a sweet, love-stricken teenage girl. The gold mini dress was covered in glitter that led up her chest to her face, where it made her radiance grow.

She didn't wear overly-sparkly jewelry. Or proactive clothing. And she was even _sober_.

If they hadn't told me it was Rose, I would have never guessed it was her.

I would have assumed it was an actress they had brought in to play _ViVi_, my infamous 'ex'.

"Don't you say one word," Rose growled at me as she noticed I was looking at her, and she went back to trying to find some way to make the dress proactive.

"Wasn't going to," I raised my hands in surrender.

Rose rolled her eyes as if to tell me that she didn't believe me, and she slammed her cigarette into the ash tray and sprayed rose-scented perfume that reminded me too much of President Snow.

Right as Rose had inflamed my nostrils with the stench of roses to get rid of the stench of smoke, someone with blue skin walked into the room.

"Get ready," she nodded towards the stage, and I took my time getting up and going to the edge of the green room, where we would walk out to the stage where Caesar Flickerman waited while Rose was basically tripping over herself to get there.

It took all of my will power not to plan a way to "accidentally" bring up Rose's _Buzz_ addiction.

"Let's give a good welcome to Rose Monroe!" Cesar Flickerman stood to the crowd.

The crowd erupted into applause, making Rose glow for more than the make-up.

"And Beaumont Winston!"

This time, the applause was deafening,

So much so that Rose almost had to pull me out to the stage.

I smiled like I was supposed to. Waved. And mumbled a few choice words I'd prefer not to repeat.

I was like all of the other people that came on that stage.

Finally, I sat down on the couch and wrapped my arm around Rose, without even strangling her!

I was being good, though I don't know why.

And then I looked at the TV screen and saw the armor for what it really looked like.

I wasn't _just_ the _Jabberjay_.

I was the _nest._

I saw now that the chainmail across my chest was the nest, which was supposed to symbolize the Capitol I suppose. And then the armor. Jabberjays flew across the armor, all flying towards the nest.

My face paled as I understood it finally.

"So, Beaumont," Caesar Flickerman began, but I couldn't hear him after that.

"Yeah, we're really happy," Rose answered for me, leaning into me and resting her head on my shoulder, though I'm sure it hurt her.

"Nervous, Beaumont?" Caesar Flickerman asked me, and I almost stopped breathing.

_Think like you would think if this was Drew._

_Think like you would think if this was Drew_, I told myself repeatedly.

"Sometimes, it's hard to see past Rose when I'm with her," I smiled, and Caesar smiled approvingly.

And the audience ate it up.

I suddenly felt like the contents of my stomach was about to come up.

Rose kissed my cheek, leaving a pastel-pink imprint of her lips that faded away like it had been designed to do that.

_Of course it was…_

"Do you miss ViVi?" Caesar decided to ask all of the 'personal' questions before it was time to get to the armor and what it meant.

"Well, yeah."

Rose looked at me, silently telling me that I said the wrong thing.

But she didn't let me finish.

"Well, ViVi and I had been best friends before. And it just takes a lot of getting used to."

Rose continued to look at me, and I began to worry that I had said _Drew_ instead of _ViVi._

"But I really love Rose," I lied, and Rose smiled again.

"Now, I must ask," Caesar smiled, "What's with the armor?"

I took a deep breath.

The Jabberjay may of said his first word.

But now he takes flight.

_**Okay, I didn't really know where to go with this chapter.**_

_**But here it is.**_

_**And I think I got Future right… or I hope I did.**_


	9. Chapter 9

_**Oaklea,**_

I watched Isis's every move as she strapped the complicated armor on me.

"You're not curious this morning," Isis laughed as she adjusted the chainmail on my chest.

"Sorry, it just kind of looks familiar," I told her as I ran my hand over the imprinted Jabberjays, trying to pick out what it was that felt like I had seen it before. Like I had _worn_ it before.

"Roman."

"What?"

"A year ago, when Katniss pulled that berry stunt, President Snow called Roman up to build this suit," Isis told me as she glanced back down at the golden wedding band on her finger, "Roman hated making it, but he put his entire soul into making it."

Isis's golden eyes began to water.

"It was actually this suit that kept us from having a baby. We agreed we wanted kids, but he was always so busy with making the armor that we decided to push it off another year."

And they didn't have another year.

It felt unnatural to see Isis cry.

Like it was something you read about in a completely unrealistic book.

"I'm sorry, Isis," I tried, not sure what to say.

"You didn't kill him…" Isis wiped away her tears, "And, besides, you need the pity right now. Not me."

She motioned towards the mirror, and I gasped.

I had almost forgotten what it felt like to be Oaklea again.

To wear an uncomfortable white jumpsuit and combat boots all the time. To have black hair and blue eyes. To just be me.

But, seeing me like this, it was like the first day all over again when I had looked in the mirror and seen that I was Beaumont.

"There are a few more things I'm going to do to it later, but that can wait, Beau."

Beau.

I began to miss when she called me _Oak Tree_ when I first met her.

"Thanks, Isis," I told her as she walked towards the door, but she hesitated before opening the door.

"You're the Jabberjay now, Beaumont."

"I know," I nodded, suddenly regretting the large breakfast I had this morning in fear that it might come up again.

"But you are still a Rebel, Oaklea."

Before I could respond, she pushed the door open and guided me towards the group of models posing as Peacekeepers.

They all snapped their phones shut or got up from their make-up chairs in presence of Beaumont. Beaumont was exactly what they wanted to be. He was famous, rich, and dating one of the most popular girls in the Capitol. And he didn't have to even lift a finger to get all of it.

Getting on my good side was a must for them.

But they didn't know that I would bad-mouth every one of them if I could.

"Beaumont has a packed schedule everyone, he needs to be at the Recruitment Office in _one _hour to sign up to be deployed," Isis told everyone in her usual superior tone, putting emphasis on the time in Nicolt's place since she was putting everything together at the Recruitment Office for my arrival.

If only I could _really_ be deployed.

Then I could get out of here.

I could fake my death and get over to the rebels, where I could hide with Drew until the war was finally over.

But I wasn't going to really be deployed.

The capitol just wanted a photo op. Once that was over, I was going right back to the mansion until the President decided that it was time we send me away to make a video, stay for a few days, and then get right back on a flight to talk about it with Caesar.

At this point, I was beginning to doubt that the Capitol people took this war seriously.

If anything, I think they saw it as the Games in the fall that the President kept going for their entertainment.

"Alright! Let's hustle people!" the photographer clapped, and people scurried around to start.

Isis stayed where she was in front of me, and she quickly brushed my hair out of my eyes and straightened my armor one last time.

"Smile, Beau. After this, Rose will be with you _all day_," Isis whispered, and I quietly groaned.

Rose had been hard to handle when it had just been her being Rose.

But, when Drew had come up in the spotlight again, Rose had been absolutely unbearable.

"That's the President's daughter, Beaumont, be careful," Isis told me in the same high-pitched voice of Nicolt, mocking how many times Nicolt had lectured us about complaining about Rose.

"You know, you're fun when you're sober," I nudged her.

"Same here, Buddy," she raised her eyebrows, reminding me of when Isis had to hide me from the President so that he wouldn't know I had gotten drunk after my last interview.

I had never really been a big drinker, except for that one party summer when I suddenly decided to melt into the peer pressure from my fellow classmates here in the Capitol. I hated not being able to control myself. But I think that was the entire point.

I couldn't control myself even _without_ the liquor. President Snow controlled me at all times, I was his _Jabberjay_. So, drinking hadn't been too awful at the time.

"Okay, I need all models to the set," the photographer told the models, and they ran to the set like their life depended on it.

Isis quickly pushed one chunk of my blonde hair out of my eyes, and she quickly started walking out of the shot.

* * *

_**Drew,**_

"And we could move the rest of the troops here," Sesame pointed on the map Alecca had been hunched over for the hour.

I didn't like Sesame, nor did I dislike her. But I had to admit that she knew what she was talking about when it came to the War.

She was a good soldier, something I could never be. She trusted Coin, and she trusted that she was on the right side.

I knew I would never go back to fight for the Capitol, but I wasn't sure sometimes if things would ever change. I worried that President Coin would only be good for a while before turning back to her old ways, and, every time I looked at Taylor, I worried that she might one day look at her own daughter's face and have to worry about her going into the Games.

Sesame had never had a thought like that in her life, nor would she probably ever.

Sesame counted on logic to get her through things, that one plus one must always equal two.

But logic had never kept my trust.

Logic told me that my mother should have gotten the vaccine in time and that she would still be around today. Logic told me that I should have never been drawn to go into the 75th Annual Hunger Games, that someone from the seam who had signed up more should have taken my place on that card. Logic told me that I would never fall in love with a boy from District One who was probably the reason I wouldn't make it out of the Arena alive. Logic told me that he would never be taken away either…

Sometimes I worried that I would end up like Sesame at the end of this war. That I would use probability and shared traits to describe why I loved Oaklea instead of feelings, like I'm sure she would do if I asked her why she had a crush on Alecca. That I would forget that feeling inside of me to be like Peeta and that I would only think of what it took to win…. That I wouldn't be me after this war was over.

"That sounds like a good plan," Alecca nodded, still not looking up from the map.

Loco moaned and rested his head on my shoulder.

Now, I was scared that I might end up like Sesame. I _knew_ I would end up like Loco if I never got my Oakie back.

A drunk with more than just one addiction and not caring anymore.

And I was scared to death that I wouldn't find my Future to pull me back like how Future had been helping Loco.

As Loco's breathing evened out, telling me he was about to fall asleep, Future started to fidget in her chair.

The five of us had been sitting in the basically-empty quarters for almost two hours now, watching them plan.

At first, it involved us.

But, with every passing second, it became less and less in our area of experience, and we were finally just left out.

Alecca paid no attention to the two of them though.

He hadn't slept in days, and I was surprised he could even sit there without passing out.

The fighting between Sesame and Future had put him on edge, and, with every snide remark between the two, I could almost see his heart breaking with the realization that he could never have both of them. He could never stay friends with Sesame and be with Future at the same time. Alecca could only have one of them, and he now had to choose which one was more important.

I glanced back to my bunk bed in longing.

We were being moved on to the next district soon, and Sesame had decided that I had to train to go into a _"real war"._ But the real training had been from Alecca stopping me every time she said it from putting her in her place about how I had been in a much worse situation than she had.

Back in District Thirteen, they understood pacing and that I would get hurt if I didn't pace myself.

Sesame had apparently missed that lesson.

Rubbing my sore muscles and trying not to stir Loco since he had fallen asleep on my shoulder, I began to go through the inventory of the things here for headphones to keep out the talking and let me go to sleep like Loco.

I was about to push Loco off of me when I heard it.

"Is that a hovercraft?" Loco asked as he woke up.

The five us all looked to each other.

As if all on cue, we all got up and started walking out of the quarters to the dusty once-battle-field.

And there it was.

Perfectly white, no stains. Everything about it screamed immaculate.

But, if President Snow had been flying in for a visit, I would have been less shocked than who I saw as the hovercraft's door slid open.

"Ramma?"

Ramma?

This _couldn't _really be Ramma.

When I first met her, you could instantly tell that she was from the Capitol. Her hair had been seaweed green and made to look like the underwater plant. She dressed _"Mermaid Couture"_, as she put it, and her skin was a light blue, with tattoos of waves breaking covering her body.

Today, her hair was a dull brown and fashioned in a sloppy ponytail. She wore the ill-fitting uniform, and the only thing mermaid in her outfit was the shell necklace she always wore. The blue had faded, only showing up slightly at her fingertips and a little at her ears. Her tattoos weren't bright like they had been with her blue skin, and, most importantly, she didn't have her camcorder in her hand.

"Drew!" Ramma ignored the others, leaving her camera man to haul things off the hover craft.

As Ramma pulled me into a tight hug, she began to jabber on.

"Our flight was horrible! I got stuck cleaning the lens for the camera for _fun!_" Ramma told me as she began to give me a once over.

I suddenly felt sick at what she must be thinking.

To Ramma, I was still _The Strong One_.

She saw me with silky black hair fashioned in a half-braid, and she still remembered me in those expensive Capitol gowns and the red floral dress I wore to the Reaping that had been such a hit. She still saw me with my make-up and my perfection, getting ready for a photo shoot.

But I was Soldier Ilium now.

My oily black hair was pulled into a braid that Future had worked on for me. I wore the frumpy grey suit and combat boots, and I hadn't seen make-up-or a Prep Team- in so long that I would panic if I saw one.

"What happened?" Ramma asked as she picked the grey fabric of my jumpsuit together and looked to my friends, "_All _of you?"

But then her gaze rested on Sesame.

"Wait, who are you?" she pointed towards Sesame.

"Sesame. Sesame Maroon," Alecca answered for Sesame while she continued to stare at Ramma.

Ramma raised her eyebrows, probably making a list in her head of her imperfections and which concealer would cover what.

"What are you doing, Ra-Ra?" I asked quickly before Sesame opened her mouth and we ended up in a huge debate about spending too much time on your appearance or not enough since they both had their adamant stands on the subject.

Ra-Ra was the name she had asked little Taylor to call her, though she was so young that she just gurgled and stared.

"Hold on," she smiled wide, and she hurried back to the hovercraft, pushing past her struggling camera man.

Alecca and Future rushed to help him up and make sure that the equipment wasn't broken, but I was paralyzed when I saw what she was holding.

"Oh my God," I whispered.

It was…_my armor._

I could tell the strong weave and aluminous anywhere.

It had been Cinna's design for me to be free to move around and not be noticed but to also shine like the moon like I had so long ago when I had first been called to go into the Arena.

I stared in disbelief, running my hand over the fabric.

"What is _that?_" Sesame asked.

"You, my little Wheat, are in the presence of _The Strong One_!" Ramma smiled.

"Sesame."

"Well, I personally don't like it. But I'm so hungry, I'd eat anything!"

Sesame rolled her eyes, but I ignored it.

I couldn't stop stearing at the armor and remember the last time I had worn it.

_When Oaklea had been captured…_

"But what is this for?" I asked finally, still staring at the little shining stars that were visible at night on the sleeves.

"You don't know?"

I looked up to her, suddenly feeling sick.

"Know _what_?"

"Chad, bring me the tablet!"

The hurt Camerman was helped up by Future, and he started to walk over to Ramma, holding the silver tablet.

She quickly pressed a button and showed the screen to me.

"_It's a beautiful day here in the Capitol, with the fall sun shining down on our wonderful city. But what's shining more today is Beaumont Winston, or shall I say the _Jabberjay_,"_ The reporter smiled into the camera, and it shifted off to the photo slide show.

Beaumont kissing Rose's cheek, which made my toes curl.

Beaumont with a few peacekeepers who were too attractive to be _real_ peacekeepers.

Beaumont signing a piece of paper with reporters surrounding him.

And then it switched to the footage.

Beaumont waved to the Capitol people, a fake smile plastered on his lips, and Nicolt pulled him through the crowd of reporters that surrounded him. He tried to say hello to people, but then the reporters started.

"_Beaumont!"_

"_Beaumont, what do you think about the stage of the war?"_

"_Well,_" he began, but another reporter cut him off.

"_Beaumont, are you nervous?"_

"_Beaumont, who are you wearing?"_

"_How does your girlfriend feel about you doing this?"_

"_Does Drew Ilium's choice about enlisting influence you in any way to join the army?"_

Oaklea froze, and he stared at the reporter.

"_What?"_

The reporter began again.

"_Does traitor Drew Ilium enlisting into the Rebellion at all influence you to enlist into the Panem Army?"_

"_Drew Ilium?"_ Oaklea froze, his fists clencing.

Nicolt wrapped her hand around Oaklea's hand.

"_Beaumont will be holding a press conference next week. You can ask your questions there."_

Nicolt quickly started to pull him off.

The little slide show ended, and it came back to the reporter from earlier.

"_A press conference? That sounds _purr-fect_,_" the reporter giggled as she rubbed her cat whiskers, "_For now that's all in Capitol news. I'm Kitty Stoner, and tune in tomorrow _for Dating Advice from Rose Monroe!"

The tablet screen went black, but I continued to stare as if it was still playing.

"It's time to come out of retirement, Drew," she rested her hand on my wrist, her voice softer now.

Retirement.

That was what they had been calling it, huh?

When I had been suffering from my mental problems, they just brought out _Keeta_. And everyone had kept their questions about me silent, almost acting as if I never existed. The Dream Team was pushed aside, which was just how we wanted it.

But I was back now.

This was _retirement?_

So, what was being back in the work force?

I felt sick, wrapping my arms around my waist.

I knew what it meant.

It was my shift.

I was repaying Katniss for taking my place.

"And you two are along for the ride," Ramma smiled at Alecca and Future, with the Camera man holding two more suits.

Chad smiled for the first time as their eyes widened at the complex garments.

Future held the skin-tight suit to her, running her hand over the clothes. The many-colored wires still blended in enough, but it was showy enough for the cameras. It was modified to hold the weapons she used most, and it was made to not get caught.

Her fingers ran over the outfit, and she flicked over a switch, making the jumpsuit light up.

Future gasped as the wires began their faint glow, and it showed the wire formation in front.

_5._

_District Five._

Chad handed Alecca his jumpsuit.

The suit was pure white, un-stainable, and there were pattern imprints that reminded me of the soft padding on the walls of our compartment. It was made to look like a general, and it would fit perfectly with his lucky combat boots, which he refused to throw away no matter how much we all tried.

Alecca pressed a button next to his Nightlock, and there was a soft glow.

_13_.

District Thirteen.

I pressed the same button on my suit, and the stars glowed more.

_12_.

District Twelve.

"We all stand as one…"

"How'd you know?"

"Oaklea thought of it," I ran my hand over my _12._

"Where are you from?" Ramma pointed to Sesame.

"Here," she stuttered, still staring at the suits.

"Chad, we need to get in touch with the team and get her some clothes for the video. And I have a little gift for you, Loco."

She smiled, almost blushing.

She had developed a crush on Loco after Finnick had been taken.

Loco's lips formed a hungry smile as he began to realize was it was.

She handed him a small white packet, and he smiled.

"Cigarettes!"

"And some Nicorrette in the hovercraft for after," she smiled, shrugging, and Loco couldn't contain his excitement.

He wrapped his arms around Ramma and kissed her.

Ramma's knees went weak, and she melted into him.

"I love you!" he pecked her lips again before running off to light up the cigarettes.

Ramma stared, her eyes wide.

But she was brought back to reality when Chad snickered.

"Chad, have you called the team yet?"

"Uh, no?"

"No time like the present," she pointed towards the Hovercraft.

Chad hesitated.

"Uh, well…"

"_Now!"_

He quickly scampered back.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Drew,**_

Future tensed as we stepped on the train.

She had a terrible fear of them, which had been a burden since we were constantly on trains to different districts for photo shoots and to round up the others for our group.

Today, we had thirteen soldiers in our '_Stand as One_' campaign, but we didn't really know each other. I only knew the names of the few I didn't like, and I was happy to be on my own with Future and Alecca again.

The others were all spreading out to make their videos to air soon, but the three of us were the only real soldiers out of the bunch, the only ones who could be used.

So, we were actually going where the war was now.

I took my seat next to Loco, who was saving a seat for his new best friend, Ramma, and I waited for everything to be brought onto our train car so that would go.

We all looked… _amazing._

Alecca's lucky combat boots were in his duffle instead of on his feet, which made him look better right there. His brown hair was crisp and fresh looking, and his icy blue eyes were complimented by his white suit.

Future looked like a complicated machine in her suit, and her long red hair had been shaped up to have braids here and there to look like the red wire on her suit. Back with her make-up and permanently-on-staff prep team, Future went from looking pretty to looking like a goddess, though Alecca didn't notice because he had always seen her that way.

Even Sesame looked flawless. It had taken three weeks, but she and Ramma had finally compromised. Her wheat-colored blonde hair had been dyed to look less dull and was fashioned in a Ramma-approved bun. Her uniform was freshly pressed, and she had agreed to get regular facials since the dust seemed to cling to her pores.

And then there was me…

I looked like the Strong One.

The girl that Oaklea-and all of Panem- had fallen in love with.

My luscious black hair was perfectly blown out, and my skin was flawless. My suit still fit perfectly, if not better now that I had lost weight from the terrible food of District Thirteen that had been brought to the battle field. And my eyes were the same beautiful green they had been before my constant tears had made them dull.

While Alecca helped carry the camera equipment with Chad, Future took her seat beside me.

"It's finally time to get started."

I nodded.

"I can't decide if I should be excited or not," Future nudged me.

"Me, too."

I was ready to get out of the photo shoots, but being followed around by a camera wasn't what I wanted either. Airing videos like a TV Show wasn't on my list of things I want to do either. But it was better, right?

"I've got supply ships with Nicorette, and I'm rarely in the shot. I'm excited."

Loco smiled at us, and I playfully hit him.

"Soldier Ilium hit me! Get her Court Marshall-ed!"

Everyone cracked a grin without meaning to.

I had worried when I met Loco that I would learn to regret letting him in on the team, but I had quickly learned that this was probably the best move I had made in a long time.

Loco made everything funny.

Even when we wanted to break down and kill Ramma, he slung his arm around her and made some joke that made us forget our anger long enough to cool down.

We _needed_ Loco.

And Loco loved being needed.

"I love you, Loco," I nudged him.

"Oh, Drew," he hugged me tightly, "If only we could be together… but my heart belongs to another. I know that it will take you forever to get over me, but one day you will. And I understand that I will always be the one who got away… But you must be strong, Drew!"

I laughed.

"Oh look at you! This is so awful that you don't even know how to respond!" Loco continued, "How horrible this all is!"

Then Loco's lips formed a smile, telling me that he had finally finished his joke, and I began to laugh harder.

"You're insane, Loco," Future told him.

"But you know you love me! If it wasn't for Alecca, I'm sure you couldn't keep your hands off me!" he smiled, and Future turned the same red as her hair.

If Alecca heard, I'm sure he would have passed out.

But Sesame did hear it, and she pursed her lips.

If anything, the past month had made Sesame and Future worse.

Maybe it was the fact that they both looked like they belonged on the cover of a Capitol Magazine, but their hatred suddenly grew.

Instead of going at each other like cats and dogs all the time, they just looked at each other.

That vile look that runs a chill down your spine.

And Sesame was doing it again.

"Hey, Guys," Alecca broke up the awkward moment by sitting in the chair next to Future, and the two girls put on a happy face for his sake.

"Alright, that should do it," Ramma smiled as Chad put the last of the equipment on board, and she proudly took her seat next to Loco as if he was handing her the Victor Crown, not a run-down train seat.

I felt my heart stop as the train began to start rolling, and the only thing that kept me from throwing up from being scared of what was happening next was gripping onto my leather bracelet.

My fingers brushed over '_Oaklea'_, and, as I closed my eyes tightly, I almost thought he would be sitting there beside me.

That we would go back to that moment when we were talking on the train about how Skye was overreacting when she started to think about how her daughter would be seventeen in the blink of an eye. That we would be sitting on the train to District Four, him clasping my hand. That it would suddenly go away.

The sudden moments of madness. The pain. The politics.

Well, it had still been there before, I guess. I just hadn't noticed it with Oaklea around…

I felt it grip me again, the insanity I was always running from, but I was snapped back to the present by Ramma speaking up.

"Alright, let's get some footage of them just goofing around. Show that they're still kids having to fight a war. All that jazz," Ramma instructed Chad, typing away at her tablet while Loco toyed with the lighter she had given him with his cigerettes.

Like a mother does to her little child, Ramma took Loco's lighter.

"Don't start a fire, Loco."

"I wasn't!"

"_Yet_."

_**Oaklea,**_

It was my last day in the Capitol, and I found myself savoring it.

This was my home after all, and I knew this would probably be the last time I would ever see it like it used to be.

As the limo drove on, I noticed the places I used to go.

Like my favorite pizza shop by my old penthouse.

Or the store where my mother used to take me on Fridays if I did well in school and buy me something to go along with my skateboard obsession.

Or even the park where I had my first kiss.

It felt weird to say District One was my home. I had always counted it as District Four because I loved it so much, but it was really the Capitol, though I don't always want to admit it. My mother raised me here…

As the billboards blinked a photo of Beaumont Winston, I watched out of the tinted window as teenage girl pointed and stared at the photos.

"President Snow is going to kill me, Oakie," Nicolt began to nervously tap her foot.

Nicolt had changed her look to what she called "Army Chic" since she was going with me to the battle field, and I was beginning to miss the owl feathers.

Her hair was dyed army green and was tied in a braid behind her back, with a streak of her hair having the army pixel print. Her green jumpsuit fit her well, and she had them incrusted with little diamonds to keep it on the flashy side. But what I found the most interesting was the new tattoos on her wrist.

It had nothing to do with the Army, and Nicolt hadn't given me an answer as to why she had chosen those letters to be printed on her wrist.

SPQR.

That was Latin, right?

I began to regret not paying attention in those history classes my mom kept signing me up for.

"I'll make it in time for the event, okay?"

Nicolt rolled her eyes as she typed away on her pixel print tablet, and I continued to stare at the place I called home.

And then the limo pulled to a stop.

Nicolt adjusted my red wig, and she wrapped up my uniform in a black trench coat.

"If you blow this, we're both dead, Oaklea," Nicolt warned me for the millionth time as she led me out of the limo and towards the school.

Xavier School for the Gifted.

It was the best school in the Capitol that didn't train.

My mom had put me in the school when I was eight, and I had been going there until last year, when I had been reaped to go into the arena. As a little boy, I thought this place was magical because it was so amazing.

And, when I first got here, I thought that the students were magical, too, with their pink hair and purple eyes and things like that.

It wasn't until I was about twelve that I began to hate it.

The way the girls paraded around only caring about flirting with the boys and their make-up. The way the boys weren't much better.

Nicolt wrapped her thin arm around me, and she pulled me through the front door.

"Oh, Nicolt!" someone ran towards Nicolt, "We got your call, and we are ecstatic that your younger brother is looking at our school."

I looked to Nicolt as the woman said, _your younger brother_, and Nicolt just smiled at her.

"Neo is so excited!"

Neo?

"Well, why don't you go look around while Nicolt and I have a word?" the woman smiled, and I nodded happy to not have to go on a guided tour and pretend to not know where I am.

Nicolt hesitantly let my hand go, and she frowned at the thought of me walking around without any guards or without her.

But I had nowhere to run.

I knew my school, yes, and I had people who would help me out for old time's sake. But they had no clue how to escape from anywhere other than math class. And, if I showed up at a Rebel sight like this, Drew wouldn't have enough time to scream before I got killed.

Nicolt seemed to understand that, so she started following the woman.

"So, what is Beaumont really like to work with?" the woman asked excitedly, and I rolled my eyes as I started walking through the school.

"_So, what was your school like?" I asked as Drew continued to read her science text book._

_Drew's green eyes looked up to me, realizing that I wasn't going to shut up. She closed the book and hugged her knees as she thought about it._

_Drew always did this when she thought about her old life back in District Twelve._

_I could tell that most people missed their life, like Peeta and Robin, but Drew didn't miss hers. Though I liked to tease her that she didn't miss it because she was so in love with me that she didn't even want to think about life before me, much less miss it, I didn't know why she didn't miss it._

_Sometimes, even I wished I could just go home._

"_It was definitely different from yours," Drew smiled, and I nodded as I sat down on the floor in front of her._

"_Alright, what was a normal day for you then?"_

_Drew tapped her leg as she thought about it._

"_I guess Annalisa woke me up and got me ready for school. I helped out in the shop for a little bit before school, and I went to class" she shrugged, "Simple day. What about you?"_

_I shrugged as I came to sit beside her on the floor and wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her head to rest on my chest._

"_I woke my mom up, and I made sure she didn't burn the penthouse down when she was curling her hair in the morning. Called Skye, made sure she remembered to not burn down the house when she was curling her hair in the morning. A lot of fire stopping."_

_Drew smiled, and I kissed the top of her head._

"_I took the train to school, and it was like a madhouse in there. I had swim practice in the morning. Went to class. Tutored my best friend, Matt, during lunch. Got stalked by girls when I was in history class. Had another swim practice after school and went to Marino's for pizza with the guys."_

"_We really had different lives, huh?" Drew entwined her hand with mine._

_I nodded, with a shrug._

The school was silent as I ran my hand over the locker that used to be mine.

"Oaklea?"

I looked back to see Matt, my old best friend, and I suddenly couldn't speak.

"Oh, sorry, you can't be him," Matt shook his head, "I guess I just thought…"

"No worries," I nodded, unable to believe that it was him.

"He was my best friend. That was his locker. Sometimes I'll be leaving class early for swim practice, and I just keep expecting to see him," Matt explained, and I continued to stare.

And then he snapped out of the memory.

"I'm sorry. What's your name?"

I froze.

"Uh, Nick."

Nick?

"I'm looking at the school."

"You one of those fame freaks?"

I knit my eyebrows in confusion.

"Because all the famous kids went here or go here now. Like Oaklea Wells. And Rose Monroe."

"No, I'm not a big fan of Rose Monroe."

Boy was that an understatement…

I noticed Matt was staring at me, trying to place me, and I began to panic. But the bell rang, and Matt quickly scurried off to science class.

I slid through the old hallway that was never used and slid into the gym, knowing no one would be there for another hour or two.

Just in case, I slid behind the bleachers and put my head in my hand.

"Get high somewhere else, Ginger."

"Rose?"

The girl beside me had to be Rose, but she looked…_human._

She looked like the Rose I used to know.

Her blonde hair was shoving her red roots, and she had a red beanie hat to cover it. Her jeans fit her loosly, and her black blazer fit her horribly.

When I knew her, Rose was the popularity-obsessed pothead.

And I saw her as that now.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she hid her stash in her jacket.

"I came to see the school before I left. What are_ you_ doing here?"

Rose buttoned up her blazer to hide the stash even more.

"You're still using Coke as your drug dealer?"

His name was Cokeland.

But, when he had become the school drug dealer, his name became Coke.

"He's discreet," Rose shrugged, "When I look like this, no one will ever guess its me."

"Unless they knew you before. And the kids here _did_."

Rose rolled her eyes.

"Want some?"

"I have a drug test in an hour."

"What are they going to do? You're going in, you might as well have fun beforehand. No good stuff like this in the army," Rose smiled as she dry swallowed Buzz.

"Good stuff?"

"Once you do it, you don't go back," Rose offered a green pill.

"Which is why I'm not going to do it."

Rose rolled her eyes and leaned back as she let the drug kick in.

She had taken more than usual because she was unable to hold back what she thought.

"What's so great about her?" Rose slurred.

"Who?"

"Drew," she poked me.

"What?"

"Your little girlfriend," she laughed, "You risked her life for her. Betrayed the Capitol because you loved her. What's so great about her?"

I stared at Rose.

If I had even wanted to answer, I couldn't.

Because I loved _everything_.

The way she pretended that she didn't need me when she had a nightmare but still clutched onto me and thanked me for calming her down.

The way she laughed.

The way she got along with my sister.

Everything…

A title wave of missing Drew hit me, and I suddenly thought about testing out Coke's products.

"You do all that for her! And you only knew her for like a week! You've known me for years," she pointed towards herself, "I did everything to get you! _Everything!_ And she just walks in with her glitter and pretty dresses, and you're in love!"

Rose poked me, and I continued to stare.

"Rose, you're high. Let's get you out of here before someone sees," I told her as I pulled on her wrist, and she fought me but I finally got her to come from under the bleachers.

"You know what, I bet she isn't even that pretty in person!" Rose continued, and I tightened my grip on her arm as I pulled her through the back door.

I rolled my eyes as I had to use all of my strength to get her to stop holding onto the door frame.

"Is she?"

"She's beautiful."

"Is she funny?"

"Yes," I told her as I tried to pry her fingers off the door.

"Do you really like her?"

"I love her," I pulled harder to get her to let go of the door, so, when she did, I fell back onto the pavement with her falling on top of me.

"Did you ever like me?" she set her chin on my chest.

"If I said yes, would you let me get up?"

"If you meant it."

Then I'm not getting up…

"Listen, we are very different people-"

"So, are you and Drew!"

"I was trying to not go back into partying hard, and that's basically all you do," I tried again.

"I could have stopped for you, Oaklea. I really could have," Rose pleaded.

"Rose, I love Drew."

With that, Rose's face fell, and she nodded.

"When my dad told me you were coming, I made him make me your girlfriend. I thought that, if we could bring you back to your old life, you would see that you missed it. And that you wanted to stay by Panem. And that you would…" her voice quavered, "fall in love with me along the way."

I stared at Rose in disbelief.

"And I kept thinking that you'd struggle to remember her name in twenty years. That she'd be a story to tell our kids, and I realized that it was the other way around."

"What?"

"If you guys win the war, you'll go get Drew. And you'll marry her. And you'll have kids. And one day your child will point to a picture of me and ask who I am. And you wont be able to remember my name. You'll remember me, but not my name. And you'll have to look to your wife, and she'll remind you that my name is Rose Monroe."

"You've been thinking about whether you'll be remembered in twenty years by a guy you never dated."

"Every girl does."

"No, they don't."

"Yes they do!" Rose's agitation from the drugs started to kick in as she stood up from lying on me.

"How much have you had, Rose?"

Rose closed her eyes as she thought about it.

"One?"

"Pills?"

Rose shook her head.

She formed her fingers into a square.

"_Bags_?" my eyes widened.

Coke's finest product.

They were hardcore. You only went after them if you were a serious druggie.

Rose has gotten much worse than I thought.

"How can you even pay for that kind of stuff?"

Coke may be only in high school, but he isn't cheap.

"Daddy," Rose told me, and I quickly understood that she didn't mean Mr. Monroe but meant her biological father, President Snow.

"He knows about this?" I motioned towards her jacket where she had her stash hidden.

"He's got the kind of money where he doesn't notice. Besides, I'm his baby girl. If I was Chris or Renee, he would be watching me. But I'm still that little baby who used to play in his rose garden," Rose rolled her eyes.

Chris and Renee were Rose's half-siblings who were almost old enough to be her parents.

It was the thought of President Snow that reminded me of where I was supposed to be soon.

"Come on, let's go get Nicolt so we can sober you up and get you to your prep team before we have to go to the cameras."

Rose's mind broke through the drug-influenced fog to remember that today was the day where she had to look like a worried girlfriend, not a stoned girl who can't move on.

Rose dropped the 'F' bomb and began to pull me through the school, blending in with the other high school students as she weaved expertly through the hallways.

I began to wonder how many times she had done this before.

Walked around without anyone noticing her.

Without _me_ noticing her.

"Where's Nicolt?" Rose asked as she slid her hat down to hide her face a little more.

"Right there," I pointed towards the blur of army green running towards us.

"Rose?"

"Who are you?"

I mouthed _Stoned_ to Nicolt, and she nodded.

"Let's get you sobered up," Nicolt wrapped her hand around Rose's arm as she began to pull the two of us out of the school.

I hadn't known that this would be the last time I had seen the school.

That it would be the last time I saw the gym. Or my old locker. Or even my best friend, Matt.

If I had, I probably would have stopped and taken a good look at it. But I was too busy making sure that Rose made it into the car without clawing Nicolt's eyes out while screaming 'Who are you?' like she had never seen her before.

_**Maybe not my best chapter. I've been so busy with my cousin's wedding and moving that I haven't had a lot of spare time. But here it is ;D**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**Drew,**_

The little girl flinched as another bomb went off above us.

"It's okay," I smiled again as I washed the blood out of her hair and ignored the camera's running.

When the bombs started going off in District Eight, I was immediately taken out of the fight. And, when I say taken out, I mean that Alecca had to literally pull me away from running back to the hospital I had been working at after they found out that I used to run a pharmacy.

But, as soon as I got here, I noticed Ramona, a patient that had been on her way to the infirmary before the bombs started to go off.

"Are you really Drew Ilium?" Ramona asked as I placed another band-aid on her leg.

"Yeah," I nodded, and her brown eyes continued to watch me.

"Is Oaklea really gone?"

I froze.

I couldn't count how many times I had been asked about him, but, every time, it hurt like the first time.

I nodded sadly, trying to keep from crying.

"Do you really love him? Or was that just for the cameras?" Ramona asked as she began to brush out her long brown hair with the hair brush Future had left around here earlier, before she had started getting nervous for Alecca and started biting her nails so much that I had to send her away because she was scaring Ramona.

"I love him," I felt my voice crack.

Ramona's eyes softened.

"How long has he been gone?"

I stopped and realized that I really had to think about it.

It was the day after my birthday, so it had been… four months? Five?

"Almost five months."

"You're mom's dead, too, right?"

For a second there, I thought she was talking about Oaklea being dead, but then I looked into her eyes and realized what she meant.

Her mom was dead.

"She died a few years ago," I nodded.

"My mom died when I was born," Ramona told me as she looked back to study the sewing machines in the underground design center that was now used as a bomb shelter.

"What about your dad?"

She nodded towards the ceiling.

"In the war."

I felt my heart break as I looked at the little girl, an orphan now.

I entwined my hand with hers, and squeezed it three times, something that my mom used to do to tell me that she loved me.

"Do you want to come meet Future, Ramona?"

Ramona's smile widened.

Future was like her hero since she was also an orphan who had done amazingly.

"My friends call me Ram-Ram," I smiled as I picked up the little girl because she wasn't supposed to put too much weight on her leg for another week or so.

"Okay, Ram-Ram," I smiled as I carried the seven year old girl away from the other patients to where Ramma was painting some chemical on Future's nails to keep her from biting her nails too much. Ramma looked up to me and then to the kid, knitting her eyebrows in confusion as if asking if I had gone and had a child who grew extremely fast in the last half hour.

"Futurina?"

Future hadn't been called Futurina in so long that she almost forgot that it was her name.

And, while Ram-Ram wasn't looking, I nudged Future with my foot.

"Hmm?" Future looked up at us, "Who's the Cutie?"

"This is Ram-Ram," I smiled as I set Ramona down on the floor and sat next to her.

"I'm Future," Future smiled at Ramona, hugging her knees as she turned to look at her.

As Ramona's face broke out into a wide smile, Future began to talk to her, and I quickly realized that _The Strong One _was nothing compared to Futurina Cabello to this little girl. As Ramma began to paint Ramona's nails the name dark brown as her eyes, I sneaked away from the three girls and headed towards the stairs that I had been banned from.

At the top of the stairs, I found the design center main office where Alecca and a few other soldiers were watching the skies for signs of progress.

"Anything on your side, Sesame?" Alecca asked into a walkie talkie.

"It's getting clear over here. The bombing is almost over, General Eviane."

Alecca told Sesame to let her know if anything happened, and he turned back to the stairway to get to the desk where he had a map.

"Are you going to bite me again?" Alecca held his clipboard over his shoulder, where I had bitten him when he pulled me away to the shelter and made me stay.

"You bit him?" a soldier looked up at me.

"Dang, you two are freaky," Loco shook his head as he popped a small piece of the white gum to help his addiction to cigarettes.

Alecca looked back to Loco.

"Are you sure he's the chaperone here?" Alecca asked as he looked back to me.

"I think you're the grown up here," I told him as I pulled myself to sit on the desk, hugging my knees as I watched the earth fly through the small windows.

"Has Future calmed down yet?" Alecca whispered as he sat beside me.

He didn't like to talk about Future in front of the soldiers below him. He thought it made it weak or something, though I always thought he did that because he just didn't want to be teased. But, in this way, I did follow his orders, and I didn't bring up Future.

I didn't listen to him in any other way. I might as well do this.

"Yeah, she met Ramona, and everyone's just in love with the little kid," I told him, knowing that my job had been to calm her down about him.

I gripped onto the desk as the ground shook again, and I noticed it was getting weaker.

"How many do you think have died today?" I asked, nodding towards the windows, and I suddenly didn't want to know.

"We'll find out in a few hours," Alecca answered as he stared at the sky, tightening his grip on the desk as the floor began to shake for the last time.

"They retreated," Sesame's voice buzzed through Alecca's walkie-talkie.

Alecca smiled at me and nudged me.

"You're officially free, Drew."

Free.

I hated that word now.

I would never be free.

Even if we won the war, I would never be free.

I would be _The Strong One_ for the rest of my life, and that was a choice I had never been given to me. Madness consumed me without any warning sometimes, and I was supposed to always be strong and prepared. I couldn't be the weak one, and I couldn't lose my mind when that was really all I wanted to do.

My freedom had been taken away when I had been Reaped to go into the Hunger Games. But Oaklea had given me the illusion of freedom.

And now he was gone, too…

"Let's go check on Future."

_**Oaklea,**_

"_Are you really Drew Ilium?" the little girl asked as Drew placed another band-aid on her leg._

"_Yeah," Drew nodded, and kid continued to stare._

"_Is Oaklea really gone?"_

_Drew froze, but she finally nodded yes._

"_Do you really love him? Or was that just for the cameras?" the little girl asked timidly._

"_I love him," Drew's voice cracked._

"_How long has he been gone?" the little girl asked as she continued to stare at Drew, her eyes softening with pity._

"_Almost five months."_

"_You're mom's dead, too, right?"_

For a second, I thought she meant that she thought she was dead. But then the camera man did a close-up to the little girl's brown eyes, and I understood that she meant that her mother was also dead.

"_She died a few years ago," Drew nodded._

"_My mom died when I was born," the little girl didn't look at Drew but at the sewing machines._

"_What about your dad?"_

_The child nodded towards the ceiling._

"_In the war."_

_Drew's green eyes filled with sadness, and she smiled weakly as she squeezed her hand._

"_Do you want to come meet Future, Ramona?" _

_Ramona's eyes lit up, and her smile spread._

"_My friends call me Ram-Ram," Ramona told her._

I pressed stop on the video before it shifted to someone from District Thirteen talking about how Panem had killed that little girl's parents and forced little kids into becoming soldiers, and I slid Nicolt's tablet back into her pixel-print case while she continued to brush her teeth in the washhouse of the District Seven compound, where we were set up for shooting.

When I got here, nothing had changed much from the President's Mansion, only Rose wasn't here.

I was escorted here by peacekeepers, and prep teams had to spend a while on me to make sure that my hair wouldn't bleed through my fake blonde coloring. They squeezed everything I would need into a small closet, and I was locked in a room until I was told I could come out.

This time, I had a small house instead of just a room.

There was my room, with so many complicated locks that it must have taken weeks to get ready. Nicolt's room, set up with a communication center to keep in touch with the Capitol. The Prep Team room for Isis and Alixander, and an empty room to get everything ready.

"Damn it! Oakie, do you know where my mints are?"

I turned to see that Isis had come into Nicolt's room and was rummaging around for her cinnamon flavored mints, the only mints she really trusted to hide the smell of alcohol on her breath, though I really think she likes them because they make her smell like a bakery and are her favorite color of gold.

Isis was probably the only person here that I really trusted here.

I loved Nicolt and all, but I knew she still secretly held her loyalty to the Capitol because she couldn't control it. It was just the way that she had been raised.

But Isis was born in District Eight and was chosen to move to District One because she was genius.

And District One had given her the best thing in the world. They gave her love. Her first day on the job, working with the District Twelve Tributes, she met Roman. By the time they moved to District Eight Tributes, they were engaged, and they were married that Victory Tour with cameras all on them. Isis and Roman were happy for six years, even about to start a family.

But then District One took him away again.

And that was worse than them not giving the gift at all.

Isis hated the Capitol, maybe even more than I did.

"I think Nicolt had them in here earlier," I looked through Nicolt's pile of different green eyeshadows, and I found the little tin box of mints.

"You found them!" Isis happily planted a kiss on my cheek, and she used her sleeve to wipe away the golden lipstick stain on my cheek.

"You're welcome," I laughed as I handed her the little box, and she immediately flipped the top open, cinnamon filling the air, and forced three mints into her mouth.

She offered a mint, which I took, and I smiled thank you.

"You know, you're addicted to these things," I nodded towards the tin as she slapped the box closed and slid it into her silver skinny jeans' back pocket.

"I'm worse than Rose," Isis smiled, and my face fell.

No one seemed to understand just how bad Rose was.

No one but me.

And I was feeling sick about the fact that I felt sorry for her.

Why did I feel sorry for her?

I hated her.

She was the devil in heels.

So, why did I feel sorry for her?

"What are we doing today?"

"Nothing. They're writing your script because of the new promos from District Thirteen," Isis shrugged as she brushed invisible lint off her shiny tank top.

I suddenly felt sick as I thought about the video I had just seen.

"You saw them, didn't you?" Isis golden eyes softened, and she led me to sit on the bed, where she hugged her knees, ignoring Nicolt's rules about no shoes on her expensive pastel pink bed spread that cost her not getting the pixel-print high heels she wanted so much.

I nodded, and Isis wrapped me up in a hug, her sequined top scratching at my skin.

"I swear, I wanted to cry and adopt that little girl the second that aired. And Drew…" Isis trailed off.

"I miss her, Isis," I began to tremble as I tried to block out my tears.

"I know, Baby, I know," Isis rubbed my back.

"I can't do it anymore, Isis. I can't do it," I told her she tightened her grip on me.

"Come here, Oak Tree," Isis pulled me through the maze of alarms and out to the door of the house, which was at the edge of the compound.

"Excuse me, Miss. Beaumont is not allowed past this point without clearance," a guard stopped Isis as soon as we got out the door.

"And what do you think I am?" Isis reached inside her boot and brought out a small ID, flashing it in front of his face, "Beaumont is already late!"

I wasn't sure if the ID had the right level or not, but Isis was intimidating enough that I would have let her go if she had shown me a card for a milkshake shop.

"Alright," the guard moved aside, and Isis pulled me through the compound to the gate where there was a hole that I realized was to get _out_ because no one wanted to get _in_.

She motioned for me to go first, and she led me through the forest of trees to show me the main village.

She finally stopped behind a pine tree, and she nodded towards what she wanted to show me.

Sickness. Death. Pain. Broken hearts.

Everything.

And I knew that the Capitol had caused it all.

"Do you have any idea how much I want to set you free out here?" Isis dapped her eyes with a tissue.

"But you can't…"

"I can't," she agreed, "Nothing would work out, and it'd be worse…"

I nodded, knowing she was right.

But there was something about standing there.

It made me yearn to run, to just run away and forget everything. To wash the dye out of my hair and take out my contacts. To go home and bring Drew back from the danger. And to just hide away where no one could ever take us apart again.

To just be there for Skye and Taylor. To make sure that Robin finally told Skye that he had been in love with her since he had first seen her at the Chariots. To be there for Drew again. To make sure that, when she woke up screaming from her horrible nightmares, I was there to wrap my arms around her and calm her down. To make sure that there was someone there who she could just tell the truth to, no watering it down to make sure that someone didn't freak out.

And I knew that I couldn't.

That it would never work out like it did in my dreams that I hid away where no one could find them.

But it felt nice to think about.

"This is what we're fighting for, Oaklea," Isis told me as she looked out to the people of District Seven again, "To end this. Just _this_."

Isis wiped away a few tears from her eyes, and I stopped and stared at one little girl with her brother and sister.

The two older siblings were opening a store, and the little girl held on to her sister's long skirt, saying something up to her.

I felt my heart break as I thought about how she was just like Drew.

_My Drew…_

If it was at all possible, I began to miss her even more.

How was it that I had only known her for a few months but yet I couldn't live without her?

"Thanks, Isis," I didn't look away from the village as I thanked Isis.

"Thank _you_, Oak Tree. You gave me a reason to keep on," Isis looked at the golden wedding band that Roman had given her six years ago, "To make sure that you didn't have to go through this."

"I think you'll find someone, Isis," I told her.

"Yeah right," Isis rolled her eyes, "In my entire life, I have loved two people. My mom, who raised me alone. Roman… and…"

Isis bit her tongue.

"And?"

"An old tribute. Probably killed by the Capitol, too…"

I decided to let that lie and nodded.

"Come on," Isis stood, brushing the dirt off her completely reflective outfit, "We need to get back before Nicolt has a panic attack."

I nodded in agreement and took her hand as she offered to help me up.

Isis led me back to the compound in silence, and I still thought about that little girl in the street.

Drew had Ram-Ram.

And I had that little girl.

I loved Drew. I loved Skye. And I already loved Taylor, though I had never seen her before.

But there was something about that little girl that made me want to fight.

The rest of the rebels had the Mockingjay. And Panem had the Jabberjay.

But I had that little girl to make me want to keep doing this.

_**Okay, I really don't know where to quite go with this right now. I know what I want in this. I know my ending. I know important moments. But then here we are.**_

_**Well, I liked it. And here it is anyway.**_

_**So, hope you enjoyed it, too.**_


	12. Still President Snow's Game

_**Drew,**_

"_Faster, run _faster_!" I told myself, though it was hard to understand because I was breathing so heavily._

_But I couldn't go any faster._

_I could feel myself losing speed with every passing second, no matter how much I needed to get to him. No, I didn't need to get _to_ him. I needed to _save_ him._

_My knees were going weak, and I was about to fall to the expensive marble floors. But then I heard it._

"_Keep moving."_

_My heart stopped._

_President Snow._

_Suddenly, I had a newfound strength, and my heart beat harder with every step I took towards the hanger. President Snow knew he was about to lose, to really lose. And, if I knew that little devil at all, I knew that he wouldn't let me win._

_He could lose, yes. But letting me win was a different thing._

_And, right now, he had all of the cards._

_My fingers tried to type in the code I had been told to get into the hanger, but the red light just kept blinking to tell me that I had gotten it wrong._

_Finally, I just grabbed my gun and shot the little box, and the door slid open._

_I froze, and President Snow stared at me in shock._

_But I wasn't looking at him._

_There he was._

_In the flesh._

_For a while, it had almost felt like it had all been a dream. That I had never known him. That he was just that guy on the TV screen, smiling at parties and standing for everything I hated. And I thought that I would never see him again…_

_He looked different. His hair was blonde and his eyes were brown. But, yet, he looked exactly the same to me…_

"_Oakie…"_

_He shook his head, telling me to leave._

_And I began to run faster._

_But then President Snow held up the gun I hadn't noticed before._

_I stopped._

"_They're right behind you, huh?" President Snow's laugh was cold and heartless, "I'm not going to make it out, am I?"_

"_They don't notice I'm gone," I lied, shaking my head._

"_I'm not dumb, Drew," President Snow shook his head as he held the gun closer to Oaklea's head, and his eyes began to water as he mouthed for me to get away._

_But I wasn't dumb either. Oaklea knew what was about to happen, and he just didn't want me to see._

"_You didn't follow the rules of the game, Drew," President Snow's cruel smile formed, "So you can't expect me to follow the rules either."_

_It seemed to happen in slow motion. President Snow began to draw back the trigger, keeping his eyes on me and taking delight in my pain. And then he let go._

_I couldn't even scream as the bullet left the barrel and went into his brain, blood splattering President Snow._

"_Oaklea!" I finally got my words to form, tears falling as I watched President Snow push his dead body off him and drop the gun to the ground._

_I could kill him now. But I didn't care._

"_Oakie," I cried, pushing his now blonde hair out of his eyes, "Please. _Please!_ I love you, please just wake up."_

_I began to think of all the times I didn't tell him I loved him. All the times I just blushed and walked away when I should have kissed him. All the times I lied and told him I was okay when all I really wanted to do was have him wrap his arms around me and cry._

"_You can leave me. You can hate me, but just wake up, Oakie," I cried harder as his blood started to drip onto me._

"_You can kill me now, Drew," President Snow smiled, and, through my tears, I looked up at him, "I'll be killed either way now that my hostage is gone. I want the best, and, you my dear, are the best."_

_But I couldn't do it._

_I didn't care anymore…_

_A triumphant smile spread across his lips, knowing that I wasn't going to do it._

"_I win."_

"Drew?"

I sat up in bed, my heart beating like a jackhammer as I looked around, waiting to see Oaklea's dead body on the floor.

But it was just Future leaning down from her top bunk to look at me.

Everything was the same.

Sesame was curled up in the corner of her bed, wrapped up in a grey blanket and smiling in her sleep, probably dreaming about Alecca. I could hear Loco's soft snoring as he slept at the edge of the room beyond the screen that separated the quarters our group had been given. Ramma was covered in pillows, muffling the sound of her snores. Chad was sound asleep quietly, and Alecca had passed out the second he hit the pillow.

"You okay?" Future asked, wiping her tired eyes as she looked at me.

I thought about telling her about the dream, but I decided to wait until morning.

"Yeah, go back to sleep."

Future didn't object, and she pulled herself back up to her bed.

It wasn't long before I knew she was asleep, and I got out of bed and tip-toed towards the trunk at the edge of my bed, which was filled with newly-delivered clothes and make-up for me.

Tying my hair up into a ponytail, I quickly slid into my flattering grey jumpsuit, and I glanced around the packed room to see if anyone had woken up yet.

When we had gotten here, Ramma had requested somewhere to store her camera equipment and prep team supplies. She hadn't expected that they would make us move in with it, and it had quickly become tight as she started to receive packages daily from our prep team in District Thirteen.

I didn't mind though. If anything, I liked it.

It reminded me of the stockroom back home.

Sometimes, it hurt to think of District Twelve. Of the pharmacy. Of my friends. Of little Mazy…

But nothing bad had ever happened in the stockroom. I used to run around and play in it, and my older brother, Jonah, used to pick me up and explain every medicine to me, something that he loved to do. And, when things got too much to bear, I would run towards the stockroom, hide behind one of the boxes and finally get peace.

But now my hiding spot was a bit different.

I slid my gun into my belt, and I quietly started towards the shooting range.

It was made for new recruits, and Sesame made me and Future frequent it for our _"training"._ There were a lot of things I couldn't do, like send people in to their deaths. But I was often referred to as the best sniper in the war since Katniss was back in District Thirteen.

And I had to admit that I liked it.

You couldn't change the rules with a gun.

The game didn't change.

You shot, and either you missed or you didn't.

And I _didn't._

Imagining that the little dot on my target was President Snow's head, I fired three shots, getting the target every time.

"This is for picking me in the reaping."

Another shot.

"This is for trying to kill my boyfriend."

Another shot.

"This is for kidnapping my boyfriend."

Two more shots.

"For turning him into _The Jabberjay."_

One shot.

"And this is for being a sore loser."

I emptied out my gun into the target, and I thought back to a time when I had won.

I was a rebel. I was _Drew Illium, The Strong One_. I had good friends, I was with the love of my life, and everything was okay for the first time.

But President Snow didn't accept defeat.

Would I see the day when this game ended?

If it ever ended…

While getting my gun ready to shoot again, I watched the sunrise be littered with earth flying everywhere as another bomb hit the city.

They didn't know that the townspeople were safe yet, but it wouldn't be long until they realized that it was either kill us or move to double forces in District Seven. And either way, we would win. At any given moment, we were all prepared to get to safety from the bombings and wait it out.

"Drew?"

I jumped, dropping my gun in the process, and I turned around to see where the voice had come from.

Loco seemed perfectly awake and alert, rubbing his neck as he fiddled with the string from his jumpsuit that had been driving him insane since he had first been given the outfit. After he had quit smoking, he had gained ten pounds, which made him look better than how he had been skin and bones before. When he was sober, he looked like a god.

I had seen him on TV for years, but I had always seen him as the lost man he was before. With pale skin from rarely leaving his victor house. Red eyes from too much drinking. Scars on his arms from mistakes while dosing himself with morphling. And that empty, forced smile.

If there was really anything that had ever made us believe that the Rebels wouldn't be like President Snow, it was his smile that District Thirteen had given him.

"What are you doing up?"

Loco shrugged as he sat down on the grass, motioning for me to sit with him.

"This is Alyce's birthday."

I gasped and couldn't decide if I should hug him or leave him to cry.

"I can still remember that feeling of our reaping day. I had a huge crush on Alyce, but she was my best friend. And I didn't want to ruin the friendship," Loco shrugged, "I wish I had. I wish I had told her I loved her every minute of every day. But I didn't."

I felt hollow as I thought about that dream.

This was just another game, and President Snow had the advantage.

So this is how it is once you lose…

"You can't take your love back. You can fall in love with someone else, but you can't take it back," Loco told me, not meeting my eyes.

"It's hard to fall in love again, Drew. But, one day, I did it," he smiled weakly, "Or, at least, I think I did. And guess what happened?"

I didn't answer.

"You guessed, it Snow took her away, too."

I knew I should have hugged him like Future would have, but I couldn't move.

"I think you'll fall in love with that Mallark guy, Peeta's brother? What's his name again?"

"Baguette, but we call him Ettie," I hugged my knees.

"You'll probably marry him and fall in love with him along the way. Give him three little children with big blue eyes and blonde hair," Loco nudged me, "But then again, maybe not…"

I couldn't imagine marrying someone else or having someone else's child.

But I had done a lot of things I couldn't have imagined a year ago.

"He's going get back to you, Drew," Loco tried.

"President Snow would never let me win, not after I changed all of the rules," I told him, still staring out at the sunrise.

_**Oaklea,**_

"They're moving in!" I heard someone scream from a walkie-talkie.

"Evacuate, I repeat evacuate. Get all of your forces to District Seven. _Now_," a peacekeeper told him into the walkie-talkie.

"Yes-" the transmission was cut off when I heard the sickening boom from a bomb, and it turned to static.

"They're beating us," the same peacekeeper told the rest of the room as he pounded his fist onto the table.

"How? A few months ago, they were a secret operation in District Thirteen!"

"I don't know. But let's get who we can in District Seven. Let's try and end this now."

"What about the kid?"

The kid.

_Me._

"Keep him around. There's no reason not to. If things get too destructive, he was supposed to return to the Capitol soon anyway."

Suddenly, I felt someone jerk me away from the door.

"Beau!" Nicolt whisper yelled as she began to pull me away from the armory and towards our house at the edge of the compound, not slowing down until she had pushed me through the door and locked us inside.

Panting, I fell to the ground and ran my hands through my hair.

The Rebels are winning…

And coming here soon.

I could get out.

I know I can.

But what happens if I do?

Who will they go after next?

Taylor?

Annalisa?

I'm not sure I can take that chance.

"Have you lost your freakin' mind, Oaklea!" Nicolt yelled, "Do you have any idea what they could do if they found you?"

"What?" I yelled back, "What are they really going to do? Kill me? Kill their _Jabberjay_? Or punish me? Oh wait, they _already_ do that!"

Nicolt shrank back, her swamp green eyes wide as she stared at me.

I had never yelled at her.

Or really anyone here, no matter how much I hated them.

I was too scared.

But I couldn't remember why I was scared anymore…

"Whatever," I stood up and started walking towards my room, hearing the sickening click of the locks as the door locked behind me.

How old was my niece?

What did she even look like?

Did she look like her father, who I had only met once, or did she look like her mother?

Was she a good baby or a little devil?

I hated that I didn't know. That someone else was learning these things about her while I was stuck here, being held captive so that President Snow can prove something to my girlfriend.

_When will he do it?_ I wondered, _When will he destroy the little hope she has and kill me already? Will she see?_

Drew and I had risked everything, and we thought that we had gotten away with it.

But there was never such a sore loser as President Snow.

No, he didn't lose.

You could win the battle, but he always won the war.

"Not this war," I muttered.

And then I heard the sound of the locks coming undone.

Someone was coming in.

A few months ago, I would have jumped up and been a good little boy.

But I stayed on the ground, slumped over as I thought about the devil better known as President Snow.

"Get up," Isis told her, crossing her arms over her ruby-like shiny dress.

Now Isis, I did what Isis said.

Nicolt? Not really.

My guards? Definitely not.

Isis? Definitely.

"You yelled," Isis told me as I stood up, and I nodded.

"Yeah."

"Took long enough, I would have been yelling this entire time," Isis smirked, and I smiled weakly.

"I have to apologize, huh?"

Isis nodded.

"It sounds like it won't be long," Isis smiled, and I raised my eyebrows.

I knew she meant that the war wouldn't be going on too much longer, but she didn't seem to understand what would happen once it was over.

President Snow wouldn't just let me go.

It was a fight for my life, and I wasn't sure I'd win.

"Cheer up, Oak Tree," she smiled, showing her unnaturally white teeth, "Now let's go get you ready for shooting, okay?"

I nodded weakly and she pulled me out.

_**Okay, Oaklea's part was lame. But I didn't know where to go with that.**_

_**I just knew I wanted the Drew part in.**_

_**And a shout out to Never Let Go, which just finished!**_

_**It's sad to see such a wonderful fanfiction go!**_


	13. Chapter 13

_**Oaklea,**_

I pulled myself up to the top branch, and I stared out to the village below as the cameras rolled.

Pain. Despair. Death.

And now something new to add to the list.

Soldiers.

They were weaving through the crowds nonchalantly, trying not to bring too much attention to themselves from their neighbors, the Panem Peacekeepers. And, if you just saw one or two of them in the street, you wouldn't notice. But if you were climbing to the top of the trees like me, they were obvious.

I began to wonder if Drew was down there.

And then I could have sworn I saw her.

There was a girl with dark black hair, standing out with how everyone around here seemed to have brown hair. She had her arm entwined with a girl with fiery red hair, both in the grey jumpsuits, and they carried around groceries, heading towards the place they had as their base.

It had been three weeks ago that they had showed up, but we had rarely heard a word.

Only I seemed to know where they were.

The abandoned woods, where no one ever really went. It was mainly private property, but the Peacekeepers didn't know that Rebels who hated the capitol owned the land.

I almost fell out of the tree with shock, but I stabled myself.

"And cut! You can come down, Beaumont!" Alixander yelled, and I nodded as I began to skillfully climb down the trees.

A few months ago, I couldn't climb if my life depended on it.

But I had been climbing to the tops of trees to see the villagers, looking for Drew, so many times that I was an expert climber now.

"You did amazing, Beau," Nicolt planted a kiss on my cheek, and I looked to see Rose, who was there for filming to remind the people of the Capitol of the couple they had fallen so in love with.

Rose looked like she was being tortured.

It was beginning to get cold as fall progressed, and Rose had dressed the part of sweet girlfriend.

Her long blonde hair was curly and falling around her soldiers, with a red cap to add a fall twist to her outfit as Nicolt had put it. Her lips were ruby red, and they had painted her cheeks flushed. Her jeans were too tight, and she was fiddling with her loose top to make it tighter.

"What now?" Rose asked, crossing her arms as she tried to get her high heel out of the ground, where it had gotten stuck.

"I want to get some shots of you two holding hands and walking back," Alixander pointed towards both of us, "And then that should be it, at least until tomorrow."

"Walking?" Rose looked at her high heels, which sunk into the ground every time she took a step.

"I'll switch with you, Rose," Nicolt told her as she began to unlace her golden combat boots, which she had taken from Isis. Rose seemed to think it over, cringing at the thought of the Capitol seeing her wearing something that wouldn't match, but she finally accepted the shoes and laced her fingers through mine.

"Hey, Beau," Rose rested her head on my shoulder just to annoy me.

"That's perfect!" Alixander smiled as he motioned for everyone else to start walking ahead of us for the video.

I tried not to moan with Alixander's choice, and I started walking along with her.

"So, how's my little druggie doing?" I smiled at Rose, knowing that they were going to just play music instead of what we were saying.

"Coke says hi, by the way," Rose smiled, "And sent a few samples."

"I think I'm good."

"Little Beaumont too sweet to get _Buzzed_?" Rose smirked.

"What would your little fans think if they found out you got _Buzzed_ on a daily basis?"

Rose's face turned angry.

"Keep it happy!" Alixander yelled, "Happy and Sappy!"

"Happy and Sappy, Oakie," Rose nudged me.

I kissed her ear, which made Alixander yell that I was doing it right now.

"I hate you."

Rose smiled, tightening her grip on my hand.

"As much as you love little Drew?"

I froze, and Rose smiled up at me, reminding me of how easy it was.

If Rose had a little bit too much of her buzz, she could easily grab a gun and go kill Drew herself. They finally had something on me, they had Drew.

My anger against Alecca for letting her join the army began to grow. I knew Drew, and I knew that no one could control her. But Alecca was General Evaine. He easily could have put a block on her enlisting and made sure that she was never in the spot she was now

And that Rose didn't have a threat.

"I could do a little too much of the _Bags_ and track her down myself. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," Rose smirked, keeping a sweet smile for the camera.

"What did I ever do to you, Rose?"

Rose seemed to think it over because she didn't want to tell me what it was. I knew and she knew, but she couldn't quite keep threatening to kill my girlfriend with something like that.

_I didn't love her…_

And she couldn't blame it on Drew because I had_ never_ loved Rose.

I had known her since I was about thirteen, and she had loved me since. But I hadn't ever loved her. I didn't even _like_ her, especially when she and Coke had started their partnership.

"You didn't take me to prom," she smirked finally.

_**Drew,**_

I climbed to the top of the tree and looked towards the compound.

Everyone was sound asleep.

The lights were out. The night was silent. And everyone thought they were perfectly safe.

They _thought._

Didn't _know_.

And that was their problem.

They had left him completely unprotected, General Lucas I mean.

He was about to get on a train the next morning, following the couple of the century back to the Capitol. This was our last time to get him, and, as the best sniper, I had been chosen to finish this out while we still had time, something Alecca had objected to.

But it was either let him go or give me a chance.

My orders were strict.

Kill. And _run_.

Adjusting my rifle on my back, I jumped from the tree to the flat roof of the house near the edge of the compound, and I began to run towards the general's house, where he had lived for almost three years now while the army went without a war.

Staring across at the house, I laid down on the roof and got my bearings right.

_If I was right, there he should be_, I told myself as I aimed my riffle at the window.

We had been watching him long enough to know the way he works, and I knew that he would be coming out to look out the window at the stars in three minutes.

Only three minutes.

I watched the window, waiting to take the shot.

I felt a little sick as I thought back to my first kill, the man who had taken Oaklea from me. Anyone else would have killed him soon, but it felt bad that I _had_. That I had taken away his life. It wasn't just a number to put on a board, he had been a person…

And then the window opened.

_Early_, I told myself, Why was he early?

Right as I was aiming for his heart so they could at least have a partially open casket at his grand funeral, he moved away from the window, and there she was.

Rose looked plain without her prep team, which was to be expected I guess. Her hair was hidden with a red cap, and she wore a floppy military jacket with a million pockets with a pair of golden combat boots covered in dirt and mud.

What was she doing here?

I thought she was on a train back to the Capitol with Oaklea.

So, Nicolt and Oaklea had gone without her?

How weird was that?

And then my attention was brought back to my target.

General Lucas handed Rose a wad of bills, and she handed him a small baggie of green pills from one of her pockets.

What the-?

So, she really is a druggie.

I had heard from stylists that she was _Buzzed_, but I had never quite understood what that meant until right now.

She saluted him and left the room, smirking as she looked through her wad of cash, and I could hear her mutter something about what a "fit Daddy will have if Lukie has to take a drug test tomorrow" as she started walking towards the house on the edge of the compound.

But I quickly averted my attention back to General Lucas.

He sat on his bed, staring out at the stars as he downed two pills with a scotch.

I could see him, but I couldn't shoot him.

Well, I could, but it would be at best a shot that would leave him unable to walk for the rest of his life. No matter what I thought of, there were no possible kill shots.

I'd have to get down…

"_Listen, Drew, if you can't get a kill shot, _leave._ Don't get in a dangerous position, alright? We need him dead, but not that much,_" Alecca's warning played over and over in my head.

But it was so easy.

I just had to climb down and take the shot. With the window open, no one would hear it, and I would be off.

And Alecca wouldn't have to know…

Strapping the rifle onto my back again, I used the windows below to climb down to the ground floor, hiding behind a decorative flower box to get a good shot at the general, who was dazed and watching the sky like a little kid, a weird smile on his face.

_One, two,_ I readied the gun, _three._

Three perfect shots to the brain.

He didn't even have time to scream before he slumped over in his arm chair, his blood dipping onto his uniform.

My riffle on my back, I began to climb back up the building, and my foot stumbled on the window as I heard a high pitched scream.

I looked back and there she was again.

Rose, holding something she probably was also going to sell to the General, a baggie of some weird white powder, screamed as she looked at the dead body of the man she had just seen a few moments ago. She dropped the bag, getting the powder everywhere, and she screamed for guards.

Oh crap.

I pulled myself up to the roof, about to take off running when Rose screamed again.

"There-there she is! That's the killer_! Get her_!" the blonde pointed to me as the guards got closer, her screams getting louder as I looked back to her, "It's _Drew Ilium!"_

And that woke the entire compound up.

I took off running, not caring about stealth since they were all waking up now anyway.

"She's on the move!" another soldier screamed from the house I had just jumped off of.

I began to run faster.

So this is how I am going to die.

Killed by some new peacekeeper who is completely unskilled with no clue what he's doing.

I thought I'd get better than _that_…

And then I heard a bullet whizz right passed me.

I didn't take the time to see the horrible marksmen who had just tried to kill me, instead, I kept running, hating myself for focusing on kickboxing instead of track like my trainers had told me to.

For once, Sesame was actually _right_…

All of the soldiers started to pile up on the roofs, and I had no choice.

Instead of jumping across, I jumped down to the ground, causing a commotion from soldiers above, and I took the time of their confusion to get a head start towards the last house, which was heavily guarded.

"What are you doing? Get up here and help us find her!" a soldier screamed down to the guards, and I hid behind a shed as I waited for the guards to leave the house to look around for the hated traitor who had just killed their general.

While everyone was looking for me towards the gate, not knowing about the tree that dropped into the last house, I climbed up to the roof and started running towards the tree that I was beginning to absolutely love.

"I'm going to bed, don't worry. I won't miss the train in the morning, Alixander."

I froze as I looked back to the boy who was sitting on the edge of the roof, taking out his headphones as he stood up and turned to look back at me.

"Drew?"

His brown eyes widened.

"Oakie."

Tears began to stream down my face as I looked at him.

How could this be Oaklea?

He was so different, but then so was I.

"You-you got taller," he smiled weakly as he ran his hand through my hair, which was covered in dirt and leaves by now from all of the climbing I had to do.

"You got blonde," I ran hand through his perfectly cropped bleach-blonde hair, which had once been long black curls.

It felt wrong to see him like this.

With sandy blond hair instead of his boyishly messy black hair. With coffee bean brown eyes instead of the light blue that had made me go weak in the knees a million times before. With light skin instead of his natural dark tan. And little differences that his prep team had made that completely changed him.

Oaklea's brown eyes began to water, and I suddenly couldn't stop myself.

Just like I had all those months ago, I got up on my tippy toes and kissed him, only it wasn't a millisecond this time.

"Beaumont, can you see anyone up there? They're looking for some girl!" someone yelled.

"No, Alix! Just me!"

"Well, get down here!"

Oaklea took a good long look.

"I love you," he kissed my cheek.

"I love you, too," my voice was small, unbelieving that it was really him.

And then he started towards the window that he had climbed out of to get up here.

"Is that her?" a soldier yelled, the same one who had tried to shoot me earlier.

I jumped so that I could reach the strongest branch of the pine tree, and I looked down to the house one more time, where Oaklea was staring up at me in awe.

I signed '_Luck_' like I had when we had started drama at the chariots, and he smiled weakly as he returned the sign.

As the soldiers started to get closer, I quickly climbed down the tree and started running towards the edge of the forest. No matter how many times I tripped on the tree trunks, I jumped up again and kept running until I had made it back to the truck at the edge of the forest.

"What the heck happened?" Alecca pointed towards the commotion at the compound.

"He's dead, and I'm alive. That's what matters," I told him as I jumped onto the truck bed and the car started moving towards our Rebel base.

Alecca continued to stare at me, but I looked out towards the trees, ignoring him.

"Drive faster, I think we've got trouble trailing us," Alecca yelled towards the driver.


	14. Chapter 14

The meantions about a victor, Dmitri, are from _Never Let Go_, a fanfiction by FutureNovelist887. Check it out! It's awesome!

And, to Future, I know I never really got your approval to do this, but I found out that I might not have an internet connection for a week, and I _really_ wanted to get this posted before I go back into book-writing mode, which I usually do when I go to the beach and get inspiration, so I knew my fanfictions would be pushed aside for a while. Sorry!

* * *

_**Drew,**_

"You're back. How'd it go?" Future asked as soon as she saw us, and I shrugged.

"It went fine."

"Fine?" Alecca raised his eyebrows at me.

"_I told you_. He's dead. I'm alive. That's what matters," I started walking faster towards the house that we had been given for our equipment, and I forced myself to tune Alecca out as he began to tell Future about what had happened, or about the few things that he knew about what happened.

"Hey, Drew," Loco waved at me as our shared stylist, Lexus, measured him to re-do his suit after he gained weight from quitting smoking.

I smiled weakly before going into the bathroom and locking the door behind me.

I pulled a washcloth over the keyhole, which is what we usually did to tell that we were taking a shower, and I quickly turned the nob to turn the water on.

But then I pulled the curtain back across the shower to keep the water from getting everywhere, and I slid down the wall to sit on the tile floor, feeling that horrible madness begin to grip me.

And I didn't have the strength to fight it off this time.

The feeling was about to take over me when the door opened, shocking me.

I looked up, and there Future was.

She quickly closed the door behind her, and my eyes were still wide.

"You're not cured," she said it like it was a statement, not a question.

I shook my head.

"I was, for a while. Before I got back to work," I told her as I hugged my knees, "I can usually control it. Just not today…"

"So, what really happened?" Future asked as she sat down on the floor beside me.

I hesitated.

"You promise not to tell Alecca?"

Future raised her eyebrows but finally nodded, and I tapped my leg as I thought how to put it.

"Everything was going right. I was taking aim to kill him, but then he was _early_ opening the window. And then my favorite drug dealer showed up…"

Future knit her eyebrows in confusion.

"That girl, Rose Monroe, the one that Beaumont is supposedly dating showed up with a baggie of pills for General Lucas to purchase," I rolled my eyes, "And, when she left, he sat down and was enjoying his little high. And it was easy to kill him, but I had to get down on the lowest level instead of the roof…"

Future finally understood why I refused to tell Alecca.

"Everything went off without a hitch until I was half-way up the ladder to the roof, and Rose came back to sell him something else, or give it to him or something like that. She saw me and screamed. And then I was stupid enough to look back. She got a good look at me and screamed that it was Drew Ilium, which woke everyone in the compound up."

"Wow," Future put her head against the tile wall, her eyes wide.

"That's not the whole story, Future."

She looked back at me, shock covering her face.

"What more could there be?"

"Nicolt got on that train _alone."_

Future's jaw dropped.

"When I was running away, I saw him on the rooftop," I put my hands to my lips, realizing that the buzz from kissing him had faded away.

"What happened?" Future's eyes softened, and she set her hand on my back comfortingly.

I tapped my lips again, closing my eyes as I thought about the kiss.

How sweet it was, how perfect…

"Are you okay, Drew?" she asked again, and I hesitated.

_No…_

"I'll be fine."

Future opened her mouth to say something, but then someone knocked on the bathroom door.

"Guys, your new script got here! You better study it because Ramma is going to start shooting bright and early!" Lexus called out, and Future and I exchanged eye rolls before she nodded towards the shower.

I quickly wet my hair and pulled it up in a ponytail before following Future out to the main room of the log cabin we had been given that used to belong to some drug dealer of District Seven.

I had to admit that I liked the house. It was small, but it felt like a mansion after the tight room we had been in while we were in District Eight. But there was still something about it…

There had been a girl who lived here who was almost brought into the games, but somehow President Snow had been blackmailed into letting her go home. She moved to District Five secretly a long time ago while her mother stayed in town, keeping up her dealer ways and going in and out of jail.

She had just up and left the house a year ago, screaming something about how she had lost everyone in this house, her two daughters, their father, and her oldest son who died. And the house hadn't been touched since she left.

The woman had left everything. When I had gotten here, I immediately wanted to leave. In the little girl's room, toys were still strewed around and a math book was still open with a piece of paper to do her homework. In the older girl's room, she had an old burned photo album with a few salvaged pictures of her with her siblings and one picture of her father that was hidden under her pillow, purposely left in District Seven.

But they had moved everything, sending things to her and her baby sister and moving some of it to the old shed that had been used to make drugs.

"There you two are," Alecca smiled as he bit into an apple which he had gotten from the tree in the backyard, next to the tree with the half-finished tree house.

"You're wet," Loco nudged me with his boot to not sit next to him on the couch, which just made me do it, and I rested my soaking wet head on his shoulder, making him grumble something about how I had gotten his favorite shirt wet.

"I just got in your new suit, Sesame," Ramma tapped her clipboard, still sore about Sesame '_accidentally'_ ruining her wheat-themed suit.

Sesame tried not to pout as she pulled herself to sit on the kitchen counter, staring at Alecca out of the corner of her eye.

"Alright, let's get down to business," Ramma smiled as she took the last available chair, making Future have to stand beside Alecca, which annoyed Sesame, "Does anyone remember that Dmitri Flemhoff?"

I blushed, hiding my face in Loco's shirt.

I had a huge crush on him when he was in the Hunger Games.

"That guy from District Five!"

Everyone turned back to stare at Future, who was turning bright red.

"Uh, that was him, right?"

"You had a crush on him, too?" I asked, peaking at my friend.

Future nodded sheepishly, and Alecca froze, not sure how to handle the new information.

"Oh, I remember him! Didn't he start dating that girl from District Seven, Beatrix? Beatrice?" Loco asked.

Ramma rolled her eyes and returned to her clipboard.

Over the last few weeks, Loco's antics had become tolerable instead of adorable to Ramma.

"Anyway, he's in the army now, and we're having this Tribute thing about the people who have been Tributes and are now fighting in a new kind of game, a war. Or something like that. And I think they're putting him under your orders," Ramma pointed towards Alecca, who was still thinking about how Future used to have a crush on him like the rest of Panem.

Ramma continued on, but I was beginning to fall asleep on Loco's shoulder, which he didn't mind since he fell asleep on me all the time.

"I'd suggest you guys get to bed early tonight," Ramma told us as she powered off her tablet and got up from her seat, "Good night."

She waved to us as she started towards the master bedroom that she and Lexus shared, though Lexus was always working in the living room and rarely slept.

"I'm going to bed, too," Sesame announced as she started towards the room she and Chad shared, being the only ones who were okay with sleeping in a room that had not only been where drugs were mixed but also had been the bedroom to a deceased boy.

"I should probably get this guy to bed before he and Drew both fall asleep on the couch," Alecca pointed towards Loco, and I forced myself to sit up.

"I'll be in to bed in a minute, Drew," Future nodded towards me, and I nodded before heading towards the last bedroom at the hall, which had been assigned to Future and me since the biggest, the little kid's room, had been assigned to become a make-up room.

Listening for Future, I reached to the top shelf in the closet and pulled out a newspaper with a picture of the girl who had once lived in this room with Dmitri at the big party before the 75th Hunger Games.

But my eyes stayed on the screens in the background of the Dream Team.

_I looked off to the crowds from the Garden._

_Even here, I could see the screens in perfect quality._

_Before they had to show all of the tributes, but, as it got later, they showed what everyone really wanted to see._

_The Dream Team._

_They showed Oaklea and Skye standing beside each other in the Chariots, with Oaklea looking at one person. Then they showed me with Robin beside me. Then there was the close-ups beside each other. Me and Oaklea._

_Had the Capitol ever loved anyone so much, other than Katniss and Peeta?_

_I highly doubted it._

_We were their trifecta. We were TV gold._

_Oaklea was from the world of the rich Capitol. And I was a store-owner's daughter from District Twelve._

_But we were the same._

_We both had someone to protect, and we were both working together._

_How could the Capitol not love it?_

_It was a story of two people from very different people come together to fight as one in their illustrious Hunger Games._

_But it felt weird, to have to share my relationship with Oaklea. It used to be a secret for just the four of us. It was something good that the Capitol had caused, if it was possible. It was almost in spite of the Capitol really. Though they wanted us to hate each other, we didn't._

_We were out own people, and that was something that the Capitol could never change._

_"Can't sleep either, huh?"_

_I turned around, and there he was._

_Oaklea, like me, had taken a shower to get all of the make-up and moisturizes off. But he still had the silver stud in his upper right ear, but that was a sign from the Capitol for his age, like a student ID he told me._

_I noticed that we were wearing the same thing, a grey tee shirt, red pajama bottoms, and our tokens._

_He had a bracelet, a cuff with his name engraved, something that his mother had given him for his sixteenth birthday._

_And I had my mother's locket._

_Only I had taken out a picture of me, and I had replaced it with a picture of the Dream Team, all four of us._

I reached into the jewelry box that had been sitting on the desk when I got here, and I pulled out my locket that I kept there for safe keeping.

I had changed the picture to one of the four of us in the Dining Hall in District Thirteen, all laughing and smiling like the teenagers we were, but it still hurt to see the picture just like the first one…

"I miss you, Oaklea," I ran my hand over the picture of us all.

_**Oaklea,**_

"Beaumont?"

"Beau!" someone shook me until they made my head hit the window.

I glared at Alixander, who smiled apologetically and sat back down in his seat in the train, and I looked back to the seat behind me, where Rose was being pampered after her traumatic experience, AKA trying to get my girlfriend killed.

She was being pampered by everyone because they felt sorry for her. They did her nails, they brought her everything she asked for the exact moment she asked for it, and they even massaged her temples as she told them about how horrid it had been to see General Lucas's dead body. And _no one_ dared bring up why she had been in his quarters, to make some cash off those free samples Coke had given for her to give to me.

Rose sipped at her vitamin water before she reapplied her ruby red lipstick, and she smiled as she blew a kiss at me, which just made me cringe.

"What's up with you, Beaumont?" Rose asked, a faux pout on her face, "Is this our first couple fight?"

I dug my nails into my wrist.

"This would be our _millionth_ couple fight, _if_ we were a couple."

Her manicurist, who was busy painting her nails bright gold to match the dress she was wearing to the interview that we would be happening when we got back to the Capitol, looked up to me and Rose, apparently not knowing our dirty little secret.

"You're being a grouch," Rose rolled her eyes, using the hand that had already been done to pick up a mirror and look at her reflection.

I mumbled something I would prefer not to repeat, and I looked out to the districts flying past me, holding my hands to my lips as I thought about that last night, going over everything to see if I saw anything different in Drew.

A limp. A weird twitch. Any sign of injury.

But I could only come up with her tears.

And then Rose looked back over the mirror, suddenly knowing what had happened.

"_Her_," Rose's voice was shocked and angry, "You're upset because of her, aren't you?"

I closed my eyes tighter, trying to block Rose out.

"She_ killed _someone! _Killed_!" Rose screamed.

"So trying to kill her fixes that!"

Rose's eyes widened with the shock that I had screamed.

I _didn't_ scream.

"She's the enemy!" Rose pulled her hand away from the manicurist, making her fall back.

"Since when do you care! As long as Coke's still in business and Daddy gives you the cash, you're fine!"

"That's not true!"

"If you're so concerned, why do you never try to kill _me_?"

Rose hesitated, not sure what to say about this.

"I'm the enemy, too, right? I mean, I'm _Oaklea Wells_."

The manicurist's eyes widened.

"You know, no one kills me. Why? Because I'm the Jabberjay? Or because you really just _don't_ care? Everything will be okay for you in the end, right? As long as you've got the cash and your fancy cars and expensive clothes, right?"

"Don't forget that you were one of us, Oaklea. Maybe you were born in District Four. And maybe you are a Rebel. But you were _raised_ here. Don't forget that, Oaklea," Rose narrowed her eyes, and she smiled her devilish little smile that just proved that she was President Snow's daughter.

I started towards the car of the train that was being used as the living room, but then I heard her again.

"You might be Oaklea Wells, but there's still some Beaumont Winston in you," Rose continued, and I replied by slamming the door behind me.

I turned on the TV to something about Willi, a teen pop idol in the Capitol, might be losing her fame to up-and-coming superstar, Victorious Patronage. But I stopped paying attention when Victorious started singing some horrible-high-pitched song that proved that she was more famous for her short skirt than vocal cords.

Could Rose actually be right?

Could someone really change after becoming a capitol resident?

Or was it permanently inked on your brain?

I tried to think of something that still tied me back to the District Thirteen Oaklea, the one who was in love with Drew and excited to become an uncle. The one who watched his parents fall in love again. The one who thought things were finally over.

But, aside from the memories, I had nothing.

"Beaumont," Alixander closed the door behind him, leaving his glass of peach tea on the table by the door, and he started towards me, holding a tablet, "Nicolt needs me to go ahead and get you ready. Your prep team is going to be focusing on Rose, and they want you to be mainly done."

I nodded as I got off the couch, ready to begin.

Alixander led me to the next car, where Isis was watching a tape on the couch of her stylist car.

Alixander, who had always been scared of Isis, quickly left the room, not that Isis noticed. She used the tablet to skip part of the tape and put on the crowning of the Hunger Games Victor almost twenty years agp.

"Hey, Isis."

She looked up to me, smiling weakly before looking back to the video where some red head boy was being crowned and smiling out towards his stylist, Isis, who was clapping and smiling a real smile, something that I hadn't seen on Isis before except for on TV.

Isis clicked the TV off and stood to talk to me.

"What's up, Oak Tree?" she pushed my blonde hair out of my eyes.

"Nothing."

"I heard what Rose said, if that's what's bothering you."

"How did you…?" I trailed off as Isis nodded towards the TV.

"It doesn't just pick up old Hunger Games re-runs," Isis smiled weakly.

"Do you think she's right?"

"Do you?" Isis cocked her eyebrows, and I hesitated.

Isis peaked over my shoulder, looking to see if Alixander was back or not.

Seeing that he was scared enough to stay with Rose, she partially unzipped her sapphire dress, showing me the golden imprint of a Mockingjay on her left shoulder.

"How long do you think I've had this?"

"Six months?"

_After Roman died…_

"Two years."

My eyes grew wide.

"Why do you think I left Roman working the tributes instead of turning down this job offer to work with President Snow?"

"You're a sleeper cell…"

"I was supposed to kill the Jabberjay," Isis told me as she zipped her dress back up, "We never anticipated…"

She motioned towards me.

"And Rose isn't wrong."

I stared at her in confusion.

"Some can handle it. Some can't. It's up to you who you become," Isis told me as she started towards the make-up table, motioning for me to take a seat, "Just don't make the wrong choice. Once you promise yourself to a cause, you can't go back on it, Oaklea."


	15. Chapter 15

_**Drew,**_

"You can't do this, Alecca!" I yelled as I watched all of the soldiers file out.

Right as we were about to begin shooting with _the_ Dmitri, who still made all of the girls blush as we looked at him, there was an attack in the city.

And Alecca wouldn't let me go.

"Yes, I can. I'm your commanding officer," Alecca told me, crossing his arms over a clipboard, and then I saw a flash of red hair in a sea of grey uniforms.

My jaw dropped.

"You're letting Future go!" I pointed towards my best friend.

"She didn't get the entire District Seven compound to come after her for what was supposed to be a simple hit," Alecca told me, checking something off on his clipboard, and I stamped my foot in anger, trying to think of something that would get him to let me go.

While he wasn't paying attention, I quietly started moving towards the rest of the soldiers to hide in with them, but Alecca wasn't as dumb as I wished he was.

"Dmitri!" Alecca pointed towards me, and I moaned.

Alecca was also Dmitri's commanding officer, and he was still grumpy after learning that Future, like the rest of Panem, had been in love with Dmitri when he was a tribute. And Dmitri wanted to get back on his good side, so he did just about everything Alecca said.

And I personally thought it was going to Alecca's head, which is why Future and I made a vow to do whatever we wanted.

Which we were actually doing _before_, but this time we _vowed_ to do it.

"Sorry, Drew," Dmitri whispered as he picked me up and slung me over his shoulder, carrying me towards Alecca.

"Keep an eye on her, Dmitri," Alecca smirked as he looked up from his clipboard, and I narrowed my eyes at him.

Dmitri nodded but mumbled something as he carried me back to the house, Trisha's old house.

Setting me down on the couch, he locked the door behind him and pulled a chair to sit in front of it.

"Where do you think I'm going to go, Dmitri?" I crossed my arms, narrowing my eyes at him.

Somehow, he had actually gotten hotter than he had been when he was first in the Hunger Games. His skin was tanned, a tan that hadn't come from a bottle, and his hair was kept in shape now that he had both Annie and Trisha to make sure that it was. His blue eyes shone happily from those two girls, though also saddened by not having them here, and he was one of the few I had ever met who could make that grey jumpsuit look good.

"Do you remember yesterday at all?"

He crossed his arms, and I tried not to blush.

"It didn't hurt you."

He raised his eyebrows and held up his arm, where there was an ugly blue bruise.

"I'm sorry about that one," I hugged my knees, smiling apologetically.

"You remind me a lot like her you know," he ran his hand over the walls of the house.

"Trisha?"

"Yeah, but you're taller. And more elusive. More secretive, she told me about her brother first week I met her. And-"

"We're so much alike, huh?" I laughed, and Dmitri stuck his tongue out at me.

I tried not to laugh.

"How on earth can you be older than me, Mature One?" I told him as I stood up and headed towards the kitchen.

"You just answered it. I'm the Mature One."

"Coffee?"

Well, it was like coffee, better in my opinion, but I couldn't remember the real name for it.

Dmitri told me the real name and nodded.

"So, how's life been, Dmitri?"

After learning that Anastasia was still alive thanks to a video, everything I thought I knew about him changed.

I had thought that he just lived in District Five with Trisha, taking care of her little sister, Tabitha, and trying to forget about his deceased sister that he hadn't been able to save.

But now she had secretly moved back, dying her hair or something even though no one would blab anyway. And I was beginning to wonder what had really happened…

"Fine," Dmitri shrugged, "I'm going to school soon to become a pastor."

"Awesome," I had to admit that I was a little jealous.

He knew what he wanted to do.

And I had no clue what I was supposed to do when this war was over…

"So, what do you want to do?" Dmitri asked, "When this is over? _If _it's over?"

"Uh…" I mixed a packet of zero calorie sugar, which Ramma brought because she would get mad every time she saw Future with her not-so-secret addiction to the District Twelve candies Alicia taught me to make, "I don't know…"

Dmitri decided against saying anything else on the matter, and he tapped on the chair.

"So, you and Trisha? Still together?" I asked, trying to seem happy as I handed him his coffee, or whatever that name was, and, following the glares I got for being near the door, sat down on the couch again.

"Yeah," he smiled, and it warmed my heart to see him smile after the last time I saw him on TV, he was crying as someone brought up Anastasia.

Dmitri opened his mouth to say something but then stopped himself.

"You can bring him up."

Dmitri didn't seem to believe me.

"Not _a lot_. But it's okay…" I smiled weakly, calling on the searing heat of the coffee in my hands to make sure I didn't go into my madness again.

"Are you two together? Or just something for the cameras?"

I pulled up my sleeve to show the cuff Oaklea had given me.

"If this isn't too much, what was he like?"

I had to remind myself that he and Sesame were the only ones who hadn't known Oaklea around here.

I took a deep breath as I thought about it.

"He was…" I paused, "Well, I think he balanced me out. He reminded me to calm down and just relax. He stopped me from taking myself too seriously. And he liked to take care of people…"

Dmitri motioned for me to explain.

"His mom and his little sister couldn't take care of themselves really, and he and his dad have always had to take care of them. And Skye was more like his daughter than a little sister. And he got so used to protecting his fragile little sister that he couldn't help but want to protect everyone else he loved…"

I felt sick as I realized I said it in past tense.

"He even tried to make arrangements for me," I laughed a little bit, "He told Alecca to make sure I was stayed out of trouble."

"And, as the most hated girl by the capitol, he let you into the field."

"I said that Oaklea _tried._ Not even _General Evaine_ can get the Strong One to stop causing trouble."

"You remind me of my sister," he shook his head.

"I thought I reminded you of Trisha."

"But you wouldn't accept that, remember?"

I stuck my tongue out in response.

_**Oaklea,**_

"_Dmitri," Alecca pointed towards a crowd, and Dmitri Flemhoff, a victor from District Five._

_Seeing him on the screen again felt weird, wrong even._

_The last I had seen of him on TV, he was holding Trisha's hand, who had sort of been a tribute in the 73__rd__ Hunger Games, at the opening of the 74__th__ Hunger Games. Reporters stayed away because they felt bad for him still._

_After his sister, Anastasia, died in the 73__rd__ Hunger Games, people just left him alone._

_The camera stayed trained on to Alecca, who was checking something off a clipboard._

_But then Dmitri returned into the shot._

_Only he wasn't alone this time…_

"_Keep an eye on her, Dmitri."_

_Drew narrowed her eyes as Dmitri carried her off, hitting his back to let him go._

"_She's going to kill you," Future sing-sang as she nudged Alecca._

"_I'm her boss."_

"_When has that changed anything?"_

I watched the screen as Caesar reapplied his powder pink lipstick back on, and Rose's stylist searched for Rose because she refused to put her dress on because it wasn't sexy enough for her.

They didn't seem to see what I saw.

Or maybe they were so used to it now.

I began to miss my hidden retreat in District Seven with my locked doors and no TV's.

I didn't like being back…

"That should do it," Isis told me as she straightened my blazer, and Nicolt, who was decked out in hearts because of our new love theme, typed away on her cell phone as she tried to get in touch with the new singer who had taken the Capitol by storm to get a new love song for me and Rose.

"No, I said I want a _new_ love song! With roses! And I need it now!" Nicolt screamed into the phone, "Well, if you can't do it, I'll go to Willie! I'm sure she would want a come-back song!"

After that, something seemed to calm Nicolt down.

"I'll get in touch with you then, Macy. Love ya, sis."

I stared at Nicolt.

"You have a sister?" Isis stared.

"Step-sister for a few months. Then Mom married her next husband, Jim-Jim. But Macy has always seen me as her big sister," Nicolt shrugged, putting her cell phone in her purse.

Isis and I kept staring, but Nicolt didn't notice.

"Where's Rose?"

Rose hesitantly came out of her dressing room, holding her silk robe tightly wrapped around her.

"Rose, what are you doing?" Nicolt's high from getting what she wanted from her step-sister deflated.

"I am not wearing this! Rose Monroe is sexy! Not… _Futurina Cabello_!"

"Futurina Cabello is adorable," her stylist began, but Rose cut in.

"Exactly! Adorable!"

"Listen, Rose, you're the one who got high at that party! And it was your idea to pretend that you were grieved because Beaumont was in danger!" Nicolt complained, her voice beginning to yell.

"But-"

"No buts," Nicolt yelled, earning Flickerman to stare, "Take off the robe."

"The dress is-"

"Robe. _Off._"

Rose dropped the robe, and I had to admit that she was right about the dress.

It wasn't the usual trampy Rose Monroe.

It was… Skye.

I could tell that it was made for Skye, and I began to wonder if that was the dress they were going to put her in for the interviews before they found her growing abdomen with my niece waiting to be born.

The bodice and tight and shaped like a heart, with pale pink diamonds covering it. Her pink sleeves hung on her arm like something I had seen of Willie during a music video where she was trying to look like a princess. Rose's long blonde hair fell down her back, with a heart pin holding it out of her eyes. And the ruffle skirt consumed her long legs, with a slit that I'm sure they added to ease her complaints.

"I look like a Valentines Day Barbie doll," Rose moaned.

"But a Barbie doll," her stylist smiled.

"Excuse me, Mr. Flickerman has a spa appointment soon. Can we wrap this up?" Caesar Flickerman's assistant, Nanny, told us.

A spa appointment.

I looked to Isis, who confirmed my guess.

Botox.

He could at least make it a little less _obvious._

"Of course! I am so sorry!" Nicolt nodded, latching on to me and Rose as she pulled us to the crème loveseat, and she basically threw us down before running off again.

Or what run she could manage in three inch heels.

Flickerman threw his lipstick to Nanny, who struggled to catch it without toppling over, and Caesar had us shift around to get ready to start.

By the time, he finally told the cameraman to start, I had to move from to the opposite side of the couch so that Rose could use the slit in her dress to rub my leg with her diamond platform heels, which hurt. Rose had to adjust her dress three times, and we spent ten minutes figuring out how she could put her head on my shoulder without running her curls.

"So, Beaumont, you're back!" Caesar smiled, showing his newly whitened teeth.

"Yeah," I nodded, trying to get back in the part now that punishment was still possible.

I didn't want to lose another memory of Drew…

"So, who's happier here? You or Rose?"

Rose and I forced a laugh and looked to each other.

"Uh, I'd have to say me," Rose smiled, looking back to Caesar, "I was losing my mind without my Beau!"

"And I missed my Rose," I forced myself to play along.

"You two are so adorable!"

Rose giggled and rested her head on my shoulder, wrapping her arms around my arm.

"Now, Beaumont, are you planning on going back to the war?"

"Eventually, I think. I really haven't thought about it too much. I mean, it was very rewarding, but I _did_ miss Rose. And my friends and family. So…" I shrugged, and Flickerman nodded.

"Beau, do you mind if I call you Beau?"

"Of course not."

"Well, Beau, I lot of people have been wondering about Drew Ilium. Now, is she very involved in the war?"

I froze, and Rose hug her heel into my leg to remind me to speak.

"I'd say she is," I nodded, "She is very determined for her cause."

"Did you see her?"

I felt like throwing up.

"Um, once."

"Did she see you, too?"

Saw.

Talked to.

And kissed me.

"Yes," I nodded.

"Anything special happen?"

_If you count making out with the enemy on a rooftop while the entire compound was searching for her so they could kill her…_

Rose whispered in my ear while the camera focused on Caesar.

"If you want to really protect your girlfriend, say something."

I resisted the urge to strangle her.

"I'm not allowed to say anything about military procedures," I shrugged, and Caesar smiled that I said the right thing.

"My little soldier!" Rose planted a big pink kiss on my cheek.


	16. Chapter 16

_**Drew,**_

I couldn't sleep a wink.

I tried and tried for hours, but I just tossed and turned.

When I did fall asleep for a few minutes, the nightmares forced me out again.

I knew I needed to sleep with how hard Sesame was working me, taking out her frustration of Alecca not telling Future off and running away with Sesame to live happily ever after on me. Future was getting out unharmed since Ramma had a special diet for Future, though I sometimes wonder if she just has Future babysit Loco.

The first appeal of Loco's wild personality had worn off on Ramma, and she was beginning to fall hard for Dmitri.

Loco had never much cared if Ramma liked him or not, but he had cared about her sneaking him cigarettes while Future wasn't looking, a practice she stopped because his weight would go up and down during the time where she couldn't get them for him.

And he was taking the break-up between his favorite brand, Marvelonous, very hard.

Other than Alice, I wasn't sure if he had ever been in love.

He swears up and down that he has, but he has never told me when.

But then again, I never push.

Finally, after hours and hours, I slid out of bed, and I crept across the floor to get dressed, careful not to wake up Future. Most of the time, I enjoyed having Future as my roommate, especially since I could have ended up sharing a room with Sesame, but Future always woke up so easily.

And she was beginning to take after Alecca and try to stop me from sneaking out at night.

No one knew where I went, nor did they ever ask.

They all had different guesses though.

Sesame thought I was sneaking out to go jogging since she thought I had such low endurance in her opinion.

Alecca didn't know about it for a good reason.

Dmitri thought I was sneaking out and calling District Thirteen since I had made it clear that I often missed Skye, Robin, and my family. But that theory was wrong since I often snuck them into my few calls that I was allowed to check in on the team that was still watching Oaklea that Robin now ran.

Future thought I was sneaking out to the village to get good food since Ramma had put me on a strict diet so that I could still look good in those slinky black dresses that I was known for now.

There were some days where I wanted to kill Cinna for making me famous for black dresses that looked amazing and soothing but hurt like the devil.

Lacing up my boots, I began to thank the lord that Trisha, who used to live here, had worn loose clothing that fit me now. I knew I would still be known if you got a good look at me, But who stops and stares at a teenager in a grey hoodie going for a walk in the morning with everything else that is going on?

I stopped by every door to see if the people here were actually asleep, and, after the final blast of Alecca's and Dmitri's snoring against how Loco slept like a quiet little baby, I started out the window where I knew the guards wouldn't watching.

It was a long walk to the place where I always went, but I didn't much care.

It was peaceful, and I missed peaceful.

Walking through the bleak village reminded me of home.

I didn't miss it too much, but I did miss it sometimes.

And I often wondered how it was.

We had been important members of the community, or my siblings and father were. I was always the baby. The one who looked like that girl from the Seam that the handsome shop-owner married. Everyone loved my mom though, which is why it was so weird after my mom died.

They looked at me as if I was a walking ghost of my mother.

My older brother, Jonah, who kind of looked like our mother, didn't have that though. Neither did Annalisa. They could start over, make a life for themselves.

I was expected to do things though.

Like marry an old friend, Peeta's older brother. Help run the bakery. And have the long-awaited daughter that the Malarks that wanted.

But no one expected this…

I was so busy thinking that I didn't hear someone walking towards me until they suddenly stopped, staring at me where a pathway led off to the compound.

I only noticed when I heard the sound of buzzing.

A chainsaw.

My eyes shot up, and I would have been less surprised if Oaklea was there.

"Hello, Drew."

I froze.

Instinctively, I reached for my gun, but he shook his head.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

I stared at him, my eyes gently drifting to the bush behind him, where a sniper made a purposeful ruffle with his shotgun.

"What do you want?"

"I just want to talk, Drew."

_**Oaklea,**_

"Where's Daddy?"

Rose didn't even try to pretend that she wasn't President Snow's daughter.

When we were in front of the cameras, she did. But, when she was in the mansion, it was as if she thought everyone should know. And, of course, they probably already would have.

But I still found out if annoying that she didn't at least try to pretend that Mr. Monroe was her father.

An Avox set a plate of the best hangover food known to man in front of her, and Nicolt didn't even look up from her diamond tablet when she answered.

"Not his assistant."

Rose looked to Pearl's seat to see that she wasn't there.

"Must be out of town," Isis told her, bored.

The president had never much interested her. She hated him and wished he was dead, but she didn't pay much attention to him when he was around, which was a lot.

My captive, President Snow, had often been out of town on war business, and I have to admit that I like it better that way. While I can still get the punishment of them showing things about them torturing Drew, they can't take away my memories without him.

Rose thought about it for a minute but finally dug into her un-healthy breakfast, the packet of cigarettes that would keep her thin in her pocket.

"So, what are we doing today?" I asked, remembering Copper and her nasty addiction to cigarettes even though she was the spokes model for quitting.

I hadn't seen Copper since the Hunger Games, when I guess she went into the army or was killed.

I had seen my other mentor, though he had never seen me. I only saw him when he was carrying his three year old son while his wife carried all the bags from shopping all day, him grumbling the entire time about how much he wanted to kill her sometimes.

"Shopping," Rose told me before Nicolt could even open her mouth, "With me."

I hated shopping, especially with _Rose_.

I'm ninety-nine percent sure that it is a form of torture.

"Sorry," Nicolt nodded, and I bit my tongue.

"You've got to kiss me, by the way."

We all stared at Rose.

"You don't kiss me in front of the cameras. We keep saying we're so in love."

"We don't show it because we're not in love"

Rose rolled her eyes, taking a long sip of her spiked orange juice.

"You've got to do it. She's right," Nicolt told me, her rainbow eyes sympathetic.

I added today to the long list of bad days of my captivity.

"I'm not hungry anymore," I pushed away my deluxe breakfast.

Nicolt mumbled something about how I was being a baby as she finished her one slice of toast, which was all her diet allowed her to eat at breakfast, and Isis wasn't able to eat either as Rose leaned back in her chair and fumbled around to find her hidden pack of Marvelonous, using her lucky diamond encrusted lighter to light up.

I coughed, and Isis pinched her nose.

Nicolt stared at the cigarettes.

"Mind if I try one? I look so _fat_!" Nicolt complained, looking at her size four body like it was a size _forty_, and Isis rolled her eyes as she reached across for Rose's spiked orange juice.

"You need to go take a shower then come to my room so I can get you fitted for that suit, okay?" she pointed at me, and I nodded, following after her out of the room.

Isis broke away to her room, and I was heading towards mine when I heard someone in President Snow's office.

"Where is he?" a woman asked, and I held my ear up to the door.

"Away," a kind assistant tried, but then the politician who had broken the news to me while I wasn't supposed to be listening that Drew had gone into the field.

"Where the hell do you think he is? He went to go find her!" she hissed, and I heard the sound of bottles being moved around.

"Who?"

"That idiot girl who got us stuck with that Oaklea boy! We wanted her, and she choose some boy over us," I heard the bottle be slammed down as she chugged some drink.

"You mean…?" the other woman's voice was shocked.

"Yup," the politician's voice was heavy with scotch.

"Is he going to kill her?"

"Why on earth would he do that, Elisa? God, you are as dumb as you are pretty," she spat.

Kill her.

Oh God, please no.

Please not her.

I wanted to punch down the door and find out what they were talking about, but I knew it would only put her in possible danger.

So, I did the only thing I could think to do.

I _ran._

I ran into my room and waited until I heard the safe click of the door locking to know that I couldn't go out there and do anything.

He wouldn't kill her… he wouldn't.

But would he?

I-I couldn't handle it if he did.

She was the only thing he held against me now.

With Taylor born, everyone kept Skye and Taylor safely locked up with the rest of my family, and they had tried to do that with Drew, I'm sure. But no one had ever been able to keep Drew away, which was one of the only reasons she was still alive today.

But now it would get her killed.

Why else would he go looking for her, not that it would be that hard to find her?


	17. Chapter 17

_**Drew,**_

"I just want to talk, Drew," his voice was just as cold as his name.

President Snow.

In the flesh.

If, of course, he was human, something I wasn't sure of.

He looked like himself.

His suit was perfectly pressed. He was rested, his eyes refreshed. He smelled strongly of roses, and his hair had just been freshly cut.

If I looked at him in the right light, I could see it.

I could see that he was Rose Monroe's father.

The eyes.

They were the same.

Her eyes were just as evil, just as cunning, and just as determined to get what she wanted, no matter what happened to everyone else.

President Snow motioned towards a table which had been used for picnics, and I stared at it for a long time before finally sitting down across from him.

The cold air whispered through the forest, quietly telling others to stay away. The leaves drifted around us, their golden color bright and warm. This was the kind of day that made you want to sit around with a cup of tea and just watch the leaves.

As a child, I loved fall.

Aside from the fact that it was when business was booming and we all weren't so stressed, it was also the time of year that my mother was most herself. Sometimes, worry got the best of her, but she always relaxed in the fall.

When mom died, the best memories were from the fall.

And those memories made me smile, not like the cruel winter ones.

"You look good, Drew. Have you been sleeping?" President Snow asked, smiling politely like we were sitting at a coffee shop in the Capitol.

"Not exactly."

"Well, you look refreshed. A little worried, but a stylist could take that away in no time," President Snow smiled.

I began to panic.

Was he going to take me, too?

I thought back to Skye, who had lost her brother already. She couldn't lose me, too.

And Taylor…

"What are you doing here?" I crossed my arms, keeping my eyes trained on the sniper behind President Snow.

"I wanted to talk to you, Drew, but you never were one for small talk."

He meant the interviews.

When I did everything I wasn't supposed to do…

"You know, I didn't plan for this," President Snow looked up at the trees, "I thought the Jabberjay would end the war before it ever began. That I wouldn't have to smash the rebels again."

I didn't say anything.

"None of this was planned, Drew. And you know that better than anyone because you ruined those plans," his eyes hardened, and he looked to me, "You didn't even do it, you know. That damn idiot, Posy, did."

Posy.

The girl who was in the reaping with Oaklea. She was chosen but turned nineteen and couldn't go into the Games.

"But you had Annalisa, and Skye was so much like her. And, not only did she need you, but her little baby needed you, too. You couldn't resist. And, because you decided to go to the bathroom after lunch, you put all of this into action!" his voice was getting harsher, and I had to bite my tongue not to pull out my gun and put a few bullets in his brain.

President Snow rolled his eyes.

"I made everything ready for you. For you to take over. For you to be our hero, and you turned it down for a boy that you had only known for a week. You would have been able to bring your family to the Capitol. Robin would have accompanied you with his large family, marrying some rich woman and becoming a politician, maybe. And, while he may have made a difference for the poor people in twelve, you would have been our prize."

Their prize.

I had been their prize before.

The beautiful girl from twelve in her sexy black dress with a tattoo for the Hunger Games.

A tattoo that reminded me of what happened.

"And it was all right there…" President Snow shook his head, "Such a shame that such promise be wasted because of a teenage crush."

My anger was beginning to boil, but I kept it under control for the gun pointed at me.

"You came all this way to tell me this?" my jaw tightened.

"No, I came for that," he pointed towards the tree that was being cut down far away in the distance.

The tree that helped me climb into the compound where I saw Oaklea again.

My favorite hiding spot…

"You've never been good at following the rules, Drew," he narrowed his eyes at me, "But I have the upper hand, and don't think I will hesitate. He's better alive, but we could always use a martyr."

My heart rate began to speed up.

"Why don't you kill me?" I didn't even realize I said it until I kept going, "Kill me. You hate me, and you're doing all of this because of me. Why kill him? People need him!"

"Don't think I haven't thought about it," President Snow showed his distain as his eyes washed over me, taking in how I looked from the first time he had seen me.

I was thinner and paler. Thanks to Sesame, I had muscles but I still looked like there was something wrong with me. My hair was dull and pulled up in a ponytail, and my jacket and jeans were frumpy and made me look like I was sick or something.

When he first saw me, I was beautiful.

I was vibrant. I wore sexy black gowns with big diamonds. My hair was never with a problem, and my skin was blemish-free. I was like a Tribute Goddess.

But I didn't care what he thought.

"Somehow, Drew Ilium, you are the girl we want _dead_ most but have to _keep alive_ the most."

It was like a weight lifted off my shoulders, but I stayed tense.

Why was he here?

"Why do you have to keep me alive?"

"_Him_," President Snow spoke like it was obvious, "He caught on more than I thought he would, and no matter how much we tried to adjust him back to his home, we couldn't do it. He wants you and _only_ you. He's not as dumb as he looks, you know. We could threaten his little sister, but now that the little baby has been born, you all would protect her above anything. And he would figure that out after a while."

I stared, suddenly feeling sick.

"Stay out of trouble, Drew Ilium," he leaned over the table, "I'm still in control here."

He stood and headed towards the compound, and I suddenly didn't care if he was Katniss's mark.

I was the one with the gun now.

I waited until I knew that the sniper couldn't get at me, and I brought out my gun.

"I never said I _wouldn't_ kill you, Drew," President Snow spun around with his Panem Army issued gun.

It almost seemed worth it, to take that SOB out even if it meant going out with him.

But I was holding the balance right now.

If I shot him, Oaklea died, too. And it would escalade from there…

"Goodbye, President," I bowed in respect mockingly.

"Goodbye, Soldier Ilium. I hope to not see much of you in the future."

"And I hope that, the next time I see you, you're in a body bag."

"Come on, Renualt, we have to be at a funeral," President Snow motioned for the sniper in the bushes, and my eyes widened.

That kid who tried to shoot me on the rooftop.

That little-

He stared at me with disgust before walking off with President Snow, and I gave him a gesture with my hand that I later regretted, but it felt good at the time.

_**Oaklea,**_

Watching TV was hard.

The attacks came harder and harder every time.

Talking about the Tributes who died because of the Capitol.

Drew Ilium.

And the special on Ramona, a new orphan thanks to this war, was just depressing.

But this time no one broke in on the channels, and I prayed that they would.

The Capitol had replaced _For the Love of Music_, some weird fundraiser that was really used as publicity for young singers, with the coverage of General Lucas's funeral.

Everyone throughout the Capitol wore black, though they hadn't even known who General Lucas was until the announcement of his death. Pictures of Drew Ilium were burned, and no one dared put their hair in the half-up half-down style that Drew made popular.

She was the enemy today, and everyone acted as such.

Stores closed for the day, destroying the slinky black dresses that they bought for people who wanted to look like Drew. Everyone rushed to salons to change their hair color from black, like Drew, to any other available color.

And no one dared bring her up.

Except for the reporters.

Rose adjusted her hat with the black veil so that the cameras could still get a good look at her surgically-beautified face, and she adjusted her tight black dress to make sure that she still looked hot as the pictures were snapped.

"Beaumont, Beaumont, did you know General Lucas?"

_Yeah, he was a lazy drunk who couldn't command worth a damn and has his assistant do everything._

"Yes, I had the pleasure of working with him before his untimely passing," I tried to weave through the crowd with Nicolt and Rose.

"Were you there the day he died?"

Dang it.

I finally stopped, pulling Rose closer to me for the sake of the photographers, and I nodded.

"I was getting to bed early for an early train back to the Capitol, but Rose had gone to see him to say goodbye and to thank him for letting her come see me. She was the one who found his body."

Rose faked a sob, and the reporters went wild with questions.

But one stuck out for both of us.

"Rose, did you see Drew Ilium?"

Rose tightened her grip on my wrist.

"Yes, yes, I did," she dabbed her eye with a red silk handkerchief, "She looked like a monster. Crawling through the night with her gun, taking out anyone and everyone who got in her way. I was lucky that the guards heard me screaming and were able to keep me from getting killed by her."

I tried not to kill Rose as I pretended to feel sorry for her.

I was beginning to wish that Drew _had_ killed her.

"Lucky indeed," Nicolt repeated, grabbing onto my hand, "If you excuse us, we need to be going. Beaumont and Rose have a train to catch."

A train.

We were pretending that we were going to see my cousins, but we were really spending the weekend with Rose's half-sister, President Snow's legitimate daughter, with her daughter and husband at their retreat home, where they spent most of their time.

It was only an hour or so by car, but they had arranged for a train for some odd reason, maybe to look more final to leave us alone.

"But-"

"Beaumont!"

"Rose!"

Reporters kept screaming, but I stopped listening as Nicolt pulled us away and shoved us into our limo.

Nicolt slammed the door and downed a glass of Champaign, taking a deep breath.

"We need to plan our actions. Rose, you will tell your story, but only once. Don't you drag this on, you understand?"

Rose complained, but Nicolt didn't listen.

"And, Oaklea, you need to control yourself when they bring up Drew."

"I think I'm controlling myself pretty well?!" my anger was boiling, as it did when they brought up Drew as if it was something I could control.

"Not well enough! You're supposed to _hate_ her! And, while you may be able to hide that you _love _her, you damn well don't look like you hate her!" Nicolt screamed, not caring if the driver got startled and almost crashed into a shopping mall.

"I have done my best! I put up with _her_!" I pointed to Rose, who stuck her tongue out at me, "I act like I am Beaumont! To everyone, I am Beaumont! And I do it so that the people I love can stay alive!"

"If you want them to really stay alive, work harder! I didn't, and now I'm stuck babysitting two complaining teenagers!"

I stared at Nicolt, who downed another glass of Champaign.

"Your bags are already on the train, we should be able to go right on," Nicolt nodded, motioning for the door that was opening for us, "Let's put on the show."

Nicolt pulled her black blazer on and adjusted the heart clip in her hair to produce a veil to hide her powder pink curls. The only thing worn in our group that wasn't pitch black were Nicolt's pink diamond platform heels, which made it almost impossible to walk.

But she led us towards our train car somehow, and she kept her grip tight on us.

"No comment," her voice was stern, and I looked back to Isis, who was wearing a tight black jumpsuit with a veil so that she looked like she was just covered in black fabric.

"A nice relaxing vacation," Isis smiled, pulling her arm around me as we stepped into our car, "With Nicolt working and making plans. Rose talking about her traumatic experience. A pregnant daughter of President Snow and a four year old running around. Fun, huh?"

She hip-bumped her, her laugh louder than usual.

"Are you alright?"

Isis looked around and motioned for me to follow her to the drink car.

"She is safe, Oakie," she stopped me in between cars.

"Who is safe?"

"I overheard President Snow. Drew is safe," Isis smiled, "He cannot kill her. Unless she goes completely wild, he will notkill her, Oaklea. He _will not kill_ her."

I hugged Isis tightly, and she laughed with joy.

"General Evaine will keep her in line, I'm sure. He's grown up to be like his father."

I stopped and looked back at Isis.

"You said you got the tattoo two years ago, but how long have you been a rebel?"

"Since the General in that family was General Baxter," Isis nodded, "I was one of them, of that generation of rebels. But I was brought here."

"So, you've been one of them the entire time?"

"Oaklea, _I_ got you out of the Arena."

I was about to hug her when Nicolt came through the door.

"You two, stop sneaking off. Everyone will think you're having an affair," Nicolt hissed.

"God, Nicolt, take off those stupid shoes so you'll stop being in such a bad mood!" Isis rolled her eyes, latching on to my arm and pulling me back into our train car.


	18. Chapter 18

_**Drew,**_

"Where are we?" I complained, putting my hands on my knees and taking a deep breath.

"Right around this bend, there is this amazing little store. With all these toy trains, and I used to go there all the time when I was a little kid. My Aunt Acantha used to take me there all the time."

Aunt Acantha.

The one who raised her.

Acantha was only twenty-four, the baby in her family. She was still kind of a kid herself, and she had a seven year old to raise. But she had loved her older sister, and she was determined to do as her sister's last wish.

She got a job, and she moved into her sister's old house with Futurina. And she quickly became a mom to Future, and she continued to keep the interest that her father had given her in machines.

Acantha was around. She was engaged to some guy, I think, or maybe he was about to propose. I think she had a daughter, Almathea, or maybe he had the daughter. I didn't know her very well, but everyone loved her. And, if anyone loved her most, it would be Future.

Even though she was close with her aunt and their house was secure (something a lot would be jealous for in District Twelve), they had trouble since Acantha had been a party girl forced into being a mom. She struggled to find a job period, and she worked as a waitress for three years before getting a job as an engineering assistant.

"I thought I was done for training for the day."

Sesame was getting fitted for a golden ball gown for a photo shoot, and we were all out having fun.

Or I guess what they considered fun.

Alecca was going for a long jog because he loved having fresh air so much, and Loco was getting his fix since this was the secret cigarette capitol of the country.

When Future offered to take me around her home District, I had laced up my boots to follow her.

I didn't know what she meant by showing me around. I just assumed that we were going on a quick walk through the town, and I got stuck walking around the entire district instead, seeing every inch and every rock and everything else.

"Oh shush, Drew," she rolled her eyes, and she kept walking around the district.

But then she hesitated and stared up at a house.

It was a normal size house, basically a white box with a small window in the center of the second floor and a grey door with peeling paint. There were a few flowers, but they had turned gray as well. There was an old swingset in the back yard and an ancient little train to ride on with ancient blue paint.

And they had similar houses beside them, all the same but with different names.

They were close to the train station to go to work, and it was weird to see this little gray neighborhood out of nowhere.

"Are you alright, Future?"

"I grew up there," Future pointed towards the first house, and she pointed to another house, "My best friend used to live over there. I haven't heard from her since…"

She looked like she was about to cry, and I wrapped my arm around my shoulder.

"Come on. I think Alecca said something about not wearing a shirt for his jog."

Future let out a weak laugh, and I hooked my arm on hers.

"So where was that store again?"

I dreaded walking any farther, and I wanted to take the train back to base. But I needed to cheer her up.

"Right around the corner."

We didn't talk much as we went up the small hill.

Well, I couldn't breathe enough to talk, and Future was thinking too much to talk.

I could see the store in the distance, with old red paint with all different kind of brands of toy trains as we finished up the steps.

"Is that it?"

"God, it hasn't changed. It probably should have."

I had wanted to laugh for so long.

It was our problem in our war camp.

We were all so serious, but we were just kids.

So, when something funny came along, we laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world.

Usually, it wasn't very funny. But it was funny. And our desperate need to laugh was sad but still there, growing stronger and stronger as time went on.

When I opened my eyes from doubling over with fits of laughter, I looked back up to the store, and we began to laugh again. I was laughing so hard that I didn't notice when her laughs went away, and I only noticed that she wasn't beside me when I was about to make another joke.

"Future?" I began to panic.

President Snow said he would keep me alive.

But Future?

"_Future?!"_

And then I saw a flash of red hair.

Down those stairs, to the only place that could make that neighborhood look vibrant.

I didn't take the time to see what it was or what was wrong.

I just broke out into a run, worried for my best friend as I ran down steps and avoided running into concrete walls.

"Future!" my heart lept for joy as I saw the familiar figure, and I began to run faster.

"Leave me alone, Drew…"

It was Future's voice.

But it was muffled, barely understandable.

And then I noticed the missing piece to the puzzle.

Future was crying.

It was the first time I had ever heard her cry, though she often had reason to. She was always so…optimistic. The only time she really hadn't been was when it came to her fight with Sesame over Alecca. And now I saw her _cry_…

She was on her knees, her head in her hands and her hair spilling over to hide her tears.

Future kept tapping the stone she was sitting by.

Almost in rhythms.

My eyes drifted to the stone, and I gasped for air.

_Adrianna Cabello _and_ Acheron Cabello_.

Her parents…

I knew I should try to comfort her.

Or that I should try to something.

But I just couldn't…

Suddenly, I remembered the day I first saw my mother's grave.

Something ached inside me, something I had almost forgotten about.

That horrible, horrible pain inside of me from where I still missed her.

I was frozen, too, missing my own mother.

I pulled myself to sit down on the sidewalk, my back against the stone wall, and I felt myself cry and gasp to keep breathing.

And then I heard gasping from someone else.

My eyes were blurry with tears as I looked up, and I gasped once more.

There was a slight hum in the air, fast paced and pounding. It sounded like something Willi sang, too loud for its own good, and I knew I would have gone deaf if I had been listening to it.

Alecca rubbed his temples as he put his head phones to some little music device in his pocket, and he ran a hand through his dark brown hair. His sweat pants hung on him perfectly, and he was surprisingly wearing his loose black tank top instead of how every girl had giggled that he was shirtless today.

"What's up with you?" Alecca pointed to me, "You're all…."

Why is it that guys can't say the words _upset_ or _crying_?

Still kind of bawling, I pointed towards the cemetery.

Alecca's face turned almost grey.

"Is-Is that?"

I nodded.

"What h-happened?" he swallowed nervously.

Sometimes he can be such an idiot.

My pain turning into anger now, I stood up and pointed towards the name.

"_Ce-me-te-ry_."

"You mean-?"

I nodded.

"Her parents."

He hesitated.

"W-wah-what do I do?"

"Hug her. Hold her. Kiss her. Something!"

Alecca kept looking from me to him, and I rolled my eyes, squeezing his hand for support.

"I love you, Alecca. You are one of my best friends. But you are a complete and utter _idiot_."

Alecca stared at me.

"Go."

Alecca nodded, and he got a little scared. But he didn't chicken out enough.

He kept walking, over the gravel and the little bit of grass to where Future was still bawling.

I wasn't sure if I had ever heard tears like that.

I couldn't imagine having lost my dad, too.

Without my mom, things were hard. None of us knew how to go on, but we all managed.

But my dad?

I couldn't have lived without my dad being there…

"Future?" Alecca awkwardly placed a hand on her back, but she didn't feel his hesitant touch.

Without another thought, she leaned into him, and she began to sob in to his shirt, and Alecca's navy eyes were shocked as he stared down at her. He just couldn't believe it. When she wanted no one within a mile radius of her, giving their apologies, she wanted him.

Maybe it just kicked in.

But I think he finally realized that she loved him.

Future's whisper was muffled, but she managed.

"My-my parents wanted me to c-cook with them. But I-I was tired from school. And I really just wanted to see Bia, my-my best friend."

Future began to cry harder, and Alecca stroked her hair.

"So, I-I told them no, and I went upstairs to finish my homework early," Future kept going, "They-They finished dinner early. When I came downstairs…"

Her tears got stronger and louder, and I couldn't hear as Future recounted how their last moments alive had been for her.

"I was seven. I-I didn't know that this was their last day alive. I would have gotten up early like my dad wanted. I would have talked to my mom at breakfast. I wouldn't have left early for the train to talk more to Cassiopeia and Bia and go sneak off to get a pretzel. And I wouldn't have wasted so much time before either…"

Alecca began to rock her, and she kept crying.

"They didn't get to see me on my tenth birthday. Or the day I broke my ankle when I was nine. Or when I got my first job. Or-or…"

"It's okay," Alecca tilted her face up, "Stop crying. Remember? I'm clueless, and I can't stand when you cry."

"You've never seen me cry," she let out a weak laugh that sounded more like more tears than a laugh.

There was only a few inches between their faces.

Maybe even less….

But Alecca closed in the space.

Future melted into him, and even Alecca seemed surprise that he had kissed her.

But he didn't care.

He felt everything I felt when I kissed Oaklea.

The way you feel like your stomach is about to melt to your feet. That little jitter in your hand, getting out all of those feelings of fireworks, perfection, and bliss.

When I was younger, I told myself that it was an old story from the Capitol, that no one ever _really_ felt like that. I just assumed it was what mothers told their daughters about falling in love.

Annalisa had always been the one who believed things like that, not me. I had been the sensible one. _She _was the romantic. And then my little Capitol boy wrapped his arms around me and kissed me, what he called a real kiss…

As I watched Future and Alecca, I began to think of Oaklea.

If only he had seen _this…_

He had always thought they should get together, but I had expected that, by the time we were celebrating our thirtieth anniversary, they would have had their first kiss.

A title wave of missing him hit me, and I suddenly couldn't look at a happy couple being lovey dovey.

Where was Loco and that drink he offered me last night?

I began to stomp away, and I rolled my eyes as regimens kept walking past.

I probably would have joined in, gotten some actual work in, had I known.

But then again, who can ever really tell their last day in the war?

_**Oaklea,**_

I took a long swig of the iced tea, and I tried not to think too much about what was in it since President Snow's pregnant daughter was staying away from them.

She was out by the pool, reaping a parenting book on how to be there for your child while a nanny played with her four year old in the pool. Her husband was on his golden phone, ordering food for tonight. Rose was applying rose scented perfume as she tried to get a tan, and Nicolt was busy typing away on her pink diamond incrusted laptop.

I was more alone that I had been in a long time.

It felt weird, actually.

A welcome relief…

I had to admit it was a perfect day, or it was simulated to be one.

There was room built into the house to make it look like the perfect summer day. The air was crisp, and the sun was high in the virtual sky. The clouds were perfectly fluffy, and there was a light breeze. Everyone played out by the pool, having a slice of summer in the fall.

Well, no.

It was winter, wasn't it?

I didn't even know…

"I'm going in to get more tea. Anyone want anything?"

"We have servants for that, Beaumont," President Snow's son-in-law shook his hand, but I was already gone inside.

It was cold there, or maybe just cold from how hot it had been in that room.

Even if it wasn't cold itself, the house just felt vacant, frigid, and completely sad.

This house was in uncharted territory, I think.

In no district.

We took a train, and we stayed a night at her official country home. And then we were woken up early, and we all got into separate helicopters with blacked out windows. When we landed, we were in this stately home that was like a compound.

There were four houses.

Three identical homes sat on the edge.

One for Rose, which wasn't used much since she was in the Capitol so much supporting her fame. And there were two identical homes for President Snow's other children.

Then there was the biggest house and the end of the property.

President Snow's home.

Where he would probably hide out.

They had enough here to keep him going at his current pace for years.

I hated knowing where it was but…well, not knowing _where_ it was.

I could never tell them where he was, no matter how much I wanted to.

"Oh, Oaklea…"

I felt like throwing up.

I turned back and he held up a glass of Scotch, and I hesitated.

After a while, I came into the parlor, where President Snow was sitting at his desk.

"Sitting out by the pool with my daughter?"

"No, too hot for me," I hated when he brought up Rose as if we actually were dating.

As if he was one of those Capitol men waiting for me to ask for her hand in marriage.

God, as if I could ever marry her.

Sure, I was in the prejudice that I only wanted to marry Drew.

But I would definitely never be able to marry Rose of all people.

Aside from her various addictions, I couldn't stand being around her, sober or high or drunk or however intoxicated. I had a friend, though I don't remember who, that summer her up in just a few short words.

Brain-Dead Bottle-Blonde Junkie.

But we were only fourteen, so we left out the junkie.

It was only a rumor then.

Now it is the harsh reality.

"Beautiful girl, my Rose."

"Yes, your plastic surgeon was amazing."

President Snow's face hardened, and he narrowed his eyes at me.

"You're alive because of her."

"Because of her?"

"Because she loves you!"

"Give her some money to give to Coke! She'll be happy again!"

He honestly didn't know.

He didn't know the name, I could tell.

It was hard to miss her promiscuous ways, but he had missed the most obvious of all. He had forgotten what she was like when she was sober…

"You should thank her."

For keeping me here for what could be the rest of my life.

What if they did lose the war?

What if they ran here?

… what if they brought me along?

Rose would need a match, like all of the others.

Why not her darling little Oaklea?

"Am I ever going to leave here?"

I did just what I didn't want to.

I sounded scared.

I was scared.

Suddenly, I saw a life ahead of me.

Spending my life here, never seeing Drew again. One day, I might forget her, or I might coax myself drugs and alcohol into forgetting her. I might convince myself that I loved Rose, and I might even convince myself to become Beaumont.

And where would that leave Skye?

Or my parents?

Or… _Drew_?

Would she spiral into a life like Loco's, or would she do as I would do? Would she make herself forget me and find someone new? Would she marry Peeta's older brother? Would she try to keep me alive by naming her first child, Oaklea, a choice that both makes her smile and cry?

"Your flight is tomorrow. Then you are to at least _pretend_ that you love my daughter, alright?"

"Yes, President Snow," I bowed, and the president watched me.

"You remind me of Drew Ilium, you know.

The girl he hated most.

_Drew Ilium, The Strong One_.

The girl I fell in love with so long ago.

Well, it wasn't that long ago, but it felt like an eternity.

Now, I barely remember my life before her.

I remember it, I guess. I went to school, and I joked around with the guys. I rolled my eyes at the crazy girls, and I ate way too much pizza for my own good.

I was teenager, and this made me grow up…

This was what it was like to the real Districts, to where the Reaping was real.

They went in with tears, not with joy. And, even if they won, they kept the scars forever, and their families hurt forever.

Even if she hadn't completely stolen my heart, she would be my hero today.

"Thank you."


	19. My Last Day In the War

_**Drew,**_

"Look at them," Loco's breath reeked of the bottle of Scotch he had been drinking almost alone.

I was there, of course. I had one glass, though I believe less. And we had been sitting, watching the dreary District Six from the rooftop of a random empty house.

From the roof, it looked even worse.

So gray. So dull.

And so… depressing.

It felt empty. I knew that it was, that these neighborhoods were now the only places not being used as a war zone. But I could that it had _always_ been empty. That it had always been like this.

The only difference was the camp full of soldiers.

"They're happy," I nodded towards the two of them.

Alecca and Future.

_Five hours._

They had been dating for five hours, but they acted as if it had been five years.

By now, everyone knew, and, from what I heard, they had the seamstresses working harder than ever to get her tear stains out of the wheat-colored ball gown they had been working on all day.

I almost felt bad for Sesame. Maybe I didn't like her, and maybe I wanted to sneak into her room and kill her with the same training boots she was killing me with.

But, while she could control being so cruel, she couldn't control being in love with Alecca, and she couldn't control that Alecca was hopelessly in love with Future. And she couldn't control that today was the day that they finally did something about it.

Was that how Rose felt?

No, I could live with accepting defeat on hating Sesame. But Rose?

She kidnapped my boyfriend and kept him as a hostage.

I was in no mood to like her any time soon.

"And rubbing it in, too," Loco took a long swig of his drink, and he offered the rest of his glass to me.

I hesitated but shrugged.

"It's not their fault our lives suck," I looked back down to Future and Alecca.

Her face was still tear stained, and she was stuck in the horrible grey jumpsuits we were forced to wear. There were pebbles in her hair from crying in the graveyard, and her eyes were red. Alecca was still drenched in sweat and wearing the horrible sports gear that he wore to go on a jog this morning.

And yet they were so perfect.

So happy…

I remembered that, that indescribable high that I felt when Oaklea was around me. I remembered the way I couldn't stop smiling and never saw any reason to, and I still remembered how mad at myself I got when I realized what a hopeless romantic I was becoming.

God, I missed it.

I finished out Loco's drink.

"I didn't say it was their fault. I said I was going to blame them," Loco put his feet up on the railing, and he reached around for a cigarette on the floor.

He lit one up and held up in the box in an offering.

"I don't smoke."

Now that I wouldn't budge on.

But having another glass?

No problem there.

"I didn't smoke once."

"Really, I thought you took your breath with a cigarette," I smiled.

"Alyce smoked."

"Sweetheart Alyce?"

"She was an angel with a little bit of devil," Loco shook his head and took a long deep breath, "I was in love with her. I wanted to impress her. The first time I smoked, I threw up."

"Like you do every Sunday morning," I smirked.

"I stopped doing that, you know."

"I don't know that. I just don't _see _it anymore."

"I did stop."

I looked to Loco, and I smiled.

"Congratulations."

I meant it.

I was proud of him.

"It's hard…" Loco admitted, staring at his cigarette burning away, "But Alyce never would have wanted me to be like this."

His cigarette burnt away, and he put it in the ash tray and reached for another.

"You know, I have another little addiction, Drew."

I wasn't surprised.

He was king of the addictions.

"Morphling?"

"I'm off that," he shrugged.

"Cutting?"

"I'm scared of blood."

"Those leaves in District Seven?"

"No, and you used up your three guesses."

"What is it then?" I crossed my arms, and he smiled as he held his cigarette between his lips as he pulled up his sleeve to show a mark on his arm.

"Is that-?" I ran my hand over the mark.

"Gold."

"Where-?"

"Long story. An old friend, kind of like a prank, I guess."

"What's the addiction?"

"It's not an addiction, per say. But I knew it would make you proud that I had a habit that wasn't bad for me."

"What do you to, Loco?"

He rubbed the mark and put a kiss on it after putting his cigarette in the ash tray.

"I pledge my loyalty to Cleo…" he smirked like it was a personal joke for someone.

"Who's Cleo?"

"Now she is something that isn't good for me, Drew."

He smiled and held out his hand as he stood.

"Now, I plan on getting drunk in my room, not here. Too much danger of falling off. Come on. Let's go. I want a drink."

"You're horrible, Loco."

It wasn't as tricky to get down, but that was probably because we were alone as we left.

No bottles to carry. No chairs to worry about, and no cigerettes to keep in a pocket.

Just us.

Loco and I took the long way to the house, and I dropped him off in his room. It wasn't long before I heard him snoring, and I got up from the arm chair I had been sitting in to go find something to do.

Usually, I liked having time off, but not today.

I was desperate to get away from my thoughts.

So desperate that I even knocked on the door next to Loco's.

Sesame's room.

She had a strict schedule.

It had been broken by her fitting today, but, now that it was over, she would try to be as usual as possible, probably trying not to think about Alecca. Either she would be going for a jog, or she would be working on plans for the next battle, her usual pastime.

I didn't like spending a lot of time with Sesame, but it seemed better than thinking about Oaklea.

"Come in."

The voice was broken, full of sadness.

So she really had heard…

I slowly peaked the door open, and I gasped as I looked at her.

Her golden hair was back to the dull wheat color it had been before and braided behind her back. She wore an unflattering grey jumpsuit, the one we had met her in, and her boots were perfect and shiny. Her cheeks were red from crying, and Ramma hadn't covered it up.

All traces of Ramma were gone actually.

And then I noticed the badge on her pocket.

It wasn't the one that we all had.

No, it was something else.

_Weapons Design, District Thirteen_

_Sesame Maroon_

It hit me full force what was happening.

She was leaving.

"Oh, it's you. I thought it was Ramma. She's been packing a bag for me, I think. Make-up and stuff like that because she doesn't want me to go back to normal."

Sesame was nicer.

Well, she was too upset to be mean.

"You-you're leaving?" it was all I could manage to say.

Sesame nodded weakly.

"I got the offer a few weeks ago, to work with Gale Hawthorn. It's an amazing opportunity, and even if it wasn't…" Sesame trailed off.

Even if it wasn't, she wanted out of here. She was only here for Alecca, and, now that he was gone from her, she had no reason to stay. No, it wouldn't have mattered if she had a reason to stay anyway. She didn't want to, and this was her way out.

I actually felt bad for Sesame as I looked at her, and I had to remind myself of how much Alecca and Future loved each other to feel better.

Gale Hawthorn though…

I remembered him, though I had never known him personally.

He was _that guy_ in school. He was the bad boy you knew to stay away from but couldn't resist. And, even though you knew he was in love with Katniss and that you would only get a kiss in the supply closet if you were lucky, you couldn't stay away.

It felt weird to think of him as this military genius.

"So you're just packing up and going? You're not saying goodbye to anyone?" I didn't know why I sounded so upset, but I did.

"I'm not good with goodbyes," Sesame shrugged weakly as she put her bag on her shoulder, and she moaned as she crammed a hot pink bag of hair supplies into her duffle.

"But what about Alecca?"

Sesame froze and looked up at me.

"He's been your best friend since you were thirteen. Don't you want to say goodbye?"

"Alecca will understand. We're in the army. We don't always have time to say goodbye…" this seemed to pain Sesame most. She and Alecca had been friends forever, but that was her problem. They would always only be friends.

And she didn't want to be his friend.

She wanted to be the girl he was in love with…

It would hurt too much to stick around now.

"Listen, Drew, I know that you and Future are friends. And I know you guys don't really like me-"

That was an understatement.

"But I did love him, okay? And I refuse to stay here and be one of those girls who pity themselves while they watch the guy they love with another girl. So this is it," Sesame sounded resolute that she was making the right decision.

Sesame awkwardly looked to her communicator.

"I have a train to catch. Tell Ramma I couldn't wait on those shoes," Sesame nodded towards me, and I moved in to the room so that she could leave.

But Sesame hesitated at the door.

"You're not as bad as I thought you were. I mean, you're not a great soldier or anything, but you're not that bad."

That was probably the best compliment I would ever get from her.

"Thanks," I nodded, "And you're not as evil as I thought you were."

Sesame smiled weakly, letting out a small laugh.

But then her face grew serious.

"I want him to be happy. Will he be happy?"

She wanted both answers.

She wanted to know that she was leaving him in peace, but she also wanted him to be upset that she had gone.

I wanted to say something that would make her feel better, but I didn't want to lie.

"He'll be happy."

And he would.

He and Future would probably be the only happy people around here actually…

"That's what matters," Sesame finally responded, and I hesitated.

"You'll be happy, too. I know you will."

"Thank you, Drew," she nodded, and this time I knew she was leaving.

For good.

She would try to stay in touch with Alecca after everything they went through, but she had chosen a different path from Alecca. And it would ruin what friendship they had left.

Sesame would meet new friends in her new regimen, and, knowing her, she'd be so fascinated working with Gale that she would forget about her old job. Sesame would get used to looking like herself and forget Ramma and her different treatments. She would give back her clothes and her uniforms, and she would stop being one of the girls in the picture.

Sesame would just be Sesame Maroon. And, one day, she would find a new Alecca. She would find someone like how Alecca was when the army was all his life, and they would be happy together.

And, one day, she and Alecca would forget each other.

They would have the memories, but they would never think of making new ones together. Sesame would be in District Thirteen or wherever the army was based. Alecca would be wherever he could have peace, and he would have this new life as a family man, I guess.

This would probably be the last time I ever talked to Sesame.

I wanted to tell her a lot of things, but I couldn't get the words off my tongue. This was really just goodbye.

"Goodbye, Sesame."

Sesame let out a weak goodbye, and she adjusted the duffle on her shoulder, giving one last good look at her room.

She knew this was it, too.

And, with that, she was gone.

She was off to the train station to get on her train and go home.

And I was left alone in what used to be Sesame's room.

_**XXXXXX**_

I ran my hand over the lace curtains, and I peered out to the moon.

Night seemed to be the only time when the District was decent.

Maybe beautiful.

But I'd have to be on the first floor, not on the second where I could see the drabness over the hill.

We were staying in one of the houses from the neighborhood that Future grew up in. it wasn't bad. It wasn't wonderful, but it was better than being in Trisha's house in District Seven. I hated being in that house…

I hated sitting there and seeing all of those family pictures of Trisha with Malcolm, smiling like little kids. I hated seeing the pictures of their father before he abandoned. And I especially hated seeing those pictures of the mom before she succumbed into drugs.

Even without the pictures, I knew the memories that were there. And, even though they were not mine, they hurt none the less.

This wasn't much different.

I knew that this had been a home.

A home to a family of four.

A wife, a husband, a son, and a daughter.

But I didn't know their stories.

Those memories could be happy for all I know.

This time the house wasn't all ours.

The bottom floor belonged to us.

But the top floor belonged to Alecca and the other generals as a war room.

Well, the top floor used to be where Sesame always was, but, now that she was gone, it was only Alecca's.

Sesame left a message with Alecca, telling him everything, but he was too high off his love for Future to notice. When he did notice though, it would probably hurt that his best friend was gone.

Without even so much as a goodbye…

"Dmitri, how can I help?"

We all had rooms, with particular assignments.

But we had ignored them and all moved into the larger living room. All but Ramma and Chad

Ramma was busy with damage control since Rose planned on releasing her story tomorrow morning, and Chad still wasn't used to having his own room. But he liked it…

But the rest of us were here.

Future and Alecca were fast asleep on the couch and had been ever since we put on one of the most boring documentaries ever made, a three hour lecture on trains. Loco was sound asleep in an arm chair, sleeping off his drinks. Dmitri took his turn as watchman. And I had tried to go to sleep, but I just couldn't.

"You're awake."

I looked back and Dmitri was all suited up to go outside.

"Where are you going?"

"Supply run. They want it to be in secret…" Dmitri told me as he laced up his boots and stifled a yawn.

"I could do it."

Dimitri stared at me like I was insane.

"What?"

"You're tired, Dmitri. I'll go and get the supplies," I offered, and I tried not to sound so excited to do it.

But I was.

I wanted to get out of here. I wanted to do _something,_ anything really.

"I'm not that tired."

He was lying.

Dmitri was exhausted, anyone could see it.

"Yes, you are. I can do it, Dmitri. You're supposed to be the watchman anyway," I told him as I zipped up my boots, which Ramma had made for me so that it wouldn't take me so long to get into my uniform for the cameras.

"Are you sure?" Dmitri was hesitant, and I didn't blame him. If Alecca ever found out about this, he would skin us both. Eventually, he'd forgive me after Future's begging, but Dmitri would be screwed.

"It's not like I'm going back to sleep anyways."

If Dmitri hadn't been so tired, he would have declined the offer and left anyway. But we were all so tired…

"Be careful then. It's only through there," he came to the window to point to the only sort of woods in the district, "At that little store, okay?"

"I'll be fine, Dmitri," I put my gun in my holster, "I'll take my gun just in case."

"And this," he handed me a communicator, and I absent-mindly put it in my back pocket.

"Dmitri, it's, like, _three feet_. Don't worry."

"Maybe I should go instead…"

"Alecca will never know," I rolled my eyes, and Dmitri remained tense.

_Tough crowd…_

"I'll see you soon," I pulled my hair into a ponytail, and I started towards the front door, motioning towards the guard outside that it was alright for me to leave.

I liked walking around here at night a million times more than in the day.

But it was still so…ignore how lame this sounds, _scary_.

Like an old Capitol horror movie, where you all scream at the girl not to go out into the creepy woods.

For me, it was the creepy neighborhood.

I hurried out of the street and towards what the locals called a forest, but I called it a bunch of trees in one area, nowhere near our forest.

This was better. It sort of reminded me of home but not too much that it hurt.

I began to worry that I would never be able to come home. I knew that Future wouldn't be able to when this was all done, nor would I want to if I were her. Sesame wanted to get And Alecca wanted a new life, too.

Out of all of us, I only saw Dmitri going back, but he had a life waiting for him.

I was thinking about Taylor and wondering what kind of life that little baby would have when I took the short-cut towards the little store that Dmitri was talking about.

And then it happened.

I didn't even see him.

I never even thought about the possibility of him either.

Why on earth would there be someone there?

But there was…

"Oh my God, it's you."

I stared in disbelief.

Franklin Deluse Lucas.

I remember the special over him.

He was General Lucas's only son.

Franklin just joined the army. He was only nineteen, and he was lucky enough not to look like his father.

He had blonde hair like his mother and bright blue eyes. His hair was straight instead of his father's curly, messy hair. He was tall and lean, not short and portly. And he had perfect cheekbones and a roman nose instead of a pug nose and chubby cheeks.

The story had been about a year ago.

They made a big deal about him joining the army the day after his eighteenth birthday.

And everyone loved him for it.

"You killed my father… you-you-"

His anger began to grow, and I finally noticed it.

His eyes. They were red…

A side effect of Buzz… or what was it?

And then it happened, almost in slow motion.

My scream was piercing as I felt the blunt force on the back of my head, and the world went dark for a minute as I fell to the ground.

It was a dull, horrible pain that throbbed.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to run.

But I was stuck.

I could just lie on my back, feeling every drop of my blood leaving my body and falling to the ground.

"You killed him! You ruined my life!" he yelled, outing his hands around my neck, "You-You-"

Then his anger bubbled over.

"You killed Helena!"

"Who-who is He-Helena?"

"You don't even know her name! You. Don't," he tightened his grip on my neck, "Even. Know. _Her. Name!_"

His anger was growing and growing, and I was crying as I reached for my gun.

But it was out of grasp.

"And you're going to die, too!" his tears streamed down his cheeks, but they weren't sad. They were just… there. Not angry really. Not happy. Not sad. _Just there…_

Then he brought out the knife.

I began to cry.

"I didn't kill her! I didn't kill her!" I didn't know that.

That hurt…

I didn't know if I had killed her, but I never wanted him to know that.

"Yes, you did!"

I wanted to keep him screaming. Not to use the knife yet…

I fumbled for the gun, my finger tips finally touching the cold metal.

_Please, please, please,_ I began to pray, _Let me get the gun._

But I couldn't get him talking long enough.

My scream was horrible, horrific. A sound I never wanted to hear again.

Blood rushed from my leg, and it hurt so much that I almost didn't feel it.

Like when you burn your hand, you scream but you only feel this white sensation for a brief second before the pain begins.

It was like that, I guess.

Only longer.

Well, maybe it wasn't.

But it felt like an eternity.

A horrible, horrible eternity.

And, during this time, my fingers finally wrapped around the gun.

My hand shook as I brought the gun up, but Franklin didn't noticed\.

Franklin was on a different kind of high this time.

A high that only came from the kill.

And he was enjoying it too much.

What had Franklin done?

This wasn't just a wound. I had those before.

This-this was…

I finally pulled the trigger, and the knife went deeper into my thigh.

I let out another high pitched scream, and my hearing went fuzzy.

"Drew! Drew! Where are you?"

Alecca.

Alecca, I think.

Before my eyesight faded to black, I think I saw him.

I know I saw Future, no one else had red hair like that.

"_Drew!"_ I read her lips, but I couldn't hear her.

And then the world faded to black.

* * *

_**I told you she would get hurt.**_


	20. Chapter 20

_**Drew,**_

_Beep._

_Beep._

_Beep._

It hurt with every beep, a horrible throb in my head.

The back of it, I think.

It pained me, but I forced myself to wake up.

To think. To open my eyes. To hear again. To push past the world of sleep.

When I did, I tried to think of what was happening and what happened before.

I blinked my eyes open, and I recoiled and the sudden bright white.

It hurt even more than the annoying beeping thing.

It was so white. So bright. And so…

I don't know. It just hurt, and I didn't want to see it.

No, no, it couldn't be.

Was this the day?

The day where President Snow broke his promise? The day where he brought me in to give me what he thought was fair punishment for everything I did? Where he threw out his leverage on me with Oaklea along with Oaklea?

I knew it was coming, but it couldn't have come already.

There was so much more I had to do.

People I had to say goodbye to.

I wanted to cry, but that would probably involve opening my eyes. And I couldn't handle that pain when I would have so much more later.

"Rest."

The voice.

It was gentle on my head, not painful.

And I knew the voice. I was sure I did.

I just couldn't remember who exactly.

But I didn't care.

It was a lot of strain to think logically, and I didn't need to either.

It took away my fears. Someone who knew I was about to die wouldn't be so gentle and sweet. They would want me to be in pain, not tell me to rest and stop the pain. This person, whoever they were, wasn't about to kill me.

And, while I had no clue where I was, that was a relief in itself.

My shoulders relaxed, and I succumbed into the gentle pillow and soft sheets.

Now what happened last night.

It still hurt, but I pushed past it.

Alecca and Future… they got together. And then I began to miss Oaklea, and I met Loco. We climbed up an old jungle gym to a small part on someone's roof, and we used old plastic chairs and looked out to the District. I shared a glass of scotch with Loco, and he started smoking.

And then we started talking. He told me about Alyce, and he told me about Cleo, not much but he told me a little about her.

Afterwards, we went to the house, and Loco went to his room.

And then Sesame left…

Dinner felt weird without Sesame or Loco, but we managed through alright. By the time dinner was over, Loco had woken up, and he wanted to hang out. So we all piled into the living room to watch a horrible movie.

Future and Alecca fell asleep on the couch, and Dmitri took watch.

Then he had to go out, and I went for him.

I suddenly felt all of the pain of the bright light, beeping machine, and trying to remember at once.

Everything came back to me, including who the voice belonged to.

I slowly sat up in the bed, and I blinked my eyes open.

The rush of pain to my head from the light made me want to lay back down, but I wanted to see.

The walls were a perfect white, a little dingy, but no stains. The ceiling was the same, and the floors were perfectly bleached tire, to remove any signs of dirt-or more likely blood. I was in a hospital bed, and there was an IV that had once been hooked up to my arm.

The room was barely furnished and was pretty small.

There was my bed, and there was a bulky light fixture. There was a rod in the corner holding scrubs, extra patient paper gowns, and something in a bag. On one side, I had the IV machine, and there was a small gray end table on the other side.

There was one uncomfortable chair, and it had been taken.

Alecca looked tired, scared, and slightly relieved.

But also annoyed.

I was here because I didn't listen to him….

"You're awake."

"Where are we?"

"Infirmary."

I looked away, and I hesitated.

"You almost died, Drew."

"But I didn't."

"You would be dead right now if Loco hadn't woken up and gone out for a smoke and heard your screams."

"But he did."

"That doesn't matter, Drew!"

Alecca looked away from me and tried to calm himself, but it did no good.

He was upset.

And I understood completely.

If anyone deserved to be upset, it was him.

"I made a promise to Oaklea, Drew, and I've been breaking it. I told him I would keep you safe."

"Alecca, I'm alive! I'm breathing. I'm thinking. I'm fine!" I just wanted him to stop.

I didn't want to hear what he would say next.

"Drew," he rubbed his temples, "This is only going to get worse and worse. We are lucky right now that you're alright. Next time, you might not be."

"Alecca," I tried.

"No, you're not spinning everything around, okay, Drew?"

"Spin what around?"

"You'll forgive me one day," he stood and picked up the clothing bag from what I guess counted as a closet, and he left it at the foot of the bed, "I'll leave you to get dressed."

And suddenly I felt it.

It had been there the entire time.

The room was…. _Moving_.

My eyes were watering as I watched Alecca walk to the door.

"Alecca, we're not in the infirmary."

"No, we are. But I never said where the infirmary was."

"How could you?!" I yelled, "You know why I have to be in this war."

"No, I don't! Why don't you tell me?!"

I wanted to say that it was a pride thing.

That I wanted to protect everyone.

But I knew I wasn't doing any good except for moral on cameras.

No, I was here for that night in District Seven.

I wanted it again…

"Alecca, you can't do this."

"I didn't!

"You-you told her."

President Coin.

He told President Coin.

The woman had wanted me dead for months.

She thought I had political promise, that I could one day take her spot. And she never wanted that…

"I had to. _Drew Ilium, The Strong One_ was ten centimeters away from being killed. What the heck am I supposed to do?"

"Alecca," I tried, not sure if I should throw something at him or cry.

"Get dressed, okay? Everyone is excited to see you, especially Future. She's been worried."

I watched Alecca leave without another word.

I fell when I first tried to get out of bed, but I managed to stand up.

As I took off the patient gown and reached for my white civilian jumpsuit, I looked at my right thigh.

My fingers traced over the large scar.

It was repulsing, horrible. It stuck out of my skin, permanently reminding me of what happened.

God, how horrible had it been?

It stared from about five inches down from my hip and went on for four inches, being pink and disgusting.

So much for lying to Oaklea about it…

I slid into the jumpsuit, and I pulled my black hair into a ponytail.

Back to square one, before I left, only with new horrible memories.

I searched in the bag for my Oaklea cuff and smiled to myself as I put it on, hiding it underneath my jumpsuit, and I took my time to lace up my boots, not wanting to have to go out and face what came next.

No one would tell me I was being an idiot, and maybe that made it worse. They would just think it and look at me with sympathy, and they would all wonder if I was becoming like Loco. They would wonder if Rose was right about me when she said I was a maniac who shouldn't be given a gun.

And I worried they were right.

I sat on my bed until Alecca returned, and he lead me through the caverns of the hovercraft to what I guess was a door.

Future hugged me tightly, telling me how much she had been worried and how horrible it had been to see me like that. And Loco just hugged me and closed his eyes, letting me how worried he had been without even needing to say it.

"Future," I leaned closer to her while Alecca wasn't looking, "What happened to Dmitri?"

"He's fine. Loco covered for him. He said that he made Dmitri do something with him and sent you instead," Future smiled, knowing that our old middle school crush was safe, "But Alecca was still pretty mad, he probably understood it was all a cover. So Dmitri didn't get to come home, he's just in another regimen."

I nodded, and I was about to ask how Alecca was taking Sesame just leaving. But then ship's hum stopped, and we felt it gently land.

"Skye is really excited to see you," Future smiled weakly at me, "She even brought Taylor."

Taylor.

I smiled.

Baby Taylor.

I didn't want to hear my sister cry about how worried she was or listen to my brother tell me everything that had changed since I had gone. Or to be hugged to death by Peeta and my father as they told me never to worry them like that again.

But I did want to see baby Taylor.

Something about the thought of seeing Taylor kept me smiling as the door opened and Alecca led me again.

_**Oaklea,**_

_Drew leaves the war_

_The Strong One not So Strong_

_Drew Ilium leaves the rebel's camp due to injury_

I stared at the covers of the magazines, and I looked at the picture on every front cover.

The propaganda.

They had pictures of her with Oaklea. Pictures of her alone. Pictures of her during the war. And pictures of her before all of this began.

I wasn't sure if I could believe it since President Snow kept such a leash on things, but I knew he would also want everyone to think that he had defeated Drew.

But, if anything, she defeated him.

I was the one in trouble.

"Oooh, I want this one," Rose smiled as she picked up a magazine with her on the cover talking about how to really get a relationship to work after he's just ended a serious one, "And some gum."

Rose picked up a packet of gum and looked to me.

I rolled my eyes, hid the magazine with Drew on the cover underneath the newspaper I was buying, and handed the man the cash to pay.

"Keep the change," I locked onto Rose's arm and grabbed the bag as we started throughout the shopping district of the Capitol.

Rose knew the cameras were there, so she smiled as she leaned into me, and she pointed to random things in the windows.

"I would look ah-mah-zing in that!"

"You would look to-die-for in that suit, Beau!"

"Do you think I can wear green?"

I stopped listening after a while and just let out generic compliments to her like she was right or could look good in anything. And the press ate it up.

As we kept doing this, I began to wonder if all of those couples on the covers of magazines were like us, if they were fake and really hated each other. I had always assumed that they were crazy enough to really love each other, but maybe they weren't.

"Come on! Let's go in the store!" Rose smiled, pulling me off to a random boutique with overly expensive _everything_.

Rose sat me down in a comfortable red arm chair and was off picking out outfits with a woman who worked at the store.

For a while, I smiled at Rose and laughed, but eventually that got too boring. And I did what all of the other boys sitting in the chairs did, I found something else to do.

Instead of getting on a gadget though, I brought out my newspaper with the magazine hidden inside, and I flipped to the page with the story on Drew.

_Drew Ilium, better now known as Soldier Ilium of the Rebellion, has been sent back to headquarters._

_A few months ago, Drew murdered General Lucas, a well-known and loved General for the Panem forces, and his son Franklin Deluse Lucas was devastated. Many worried about him going back into the war, but he wouldn't have it any other way._

I think I went to the party for him leaving.

From what I remembered, he had been too busy with Rose and Cokeland to think about the war.

But I remembered him most because Nicolt warned me never to bring up anyone with a name like Helena when he was intoxicated. During the Hunger Games when I went in, he was dating a girl named Helena. They had been doing drugs, and she died with an over dose. The first face he saw afterwards was Drew's on the screen, and, through his drug fog, he had been convinced that Drew Ilium had killed Helena.

_His mother now confirms that he had hated Drew Ilium before the death of his father, as we all do, but it became almost an obsession when Drew killed General Lucas._

I skimmed through the rest of the article.

_Though we have no confirmation, it is believed that Drew Ilium almost died, but a fellow rebel found her and was able to help._

_Franklin Deluse Lucas did not survive the gunshot to his head._

Oh.

My.

God.

"Beau, what do you think of this?"

I kept staring at the magazine.

"Beau, Darling?"

I still didn't respond, thinking of what I would do to Alecca when I got back.

"Beau!"

I looked up to see Rose, who tried to sooth herself and smile like it was a joke to the other shoppers, and she spun around in a gold and silver striped dress.

That dress probably costs as much as my mom's old penthouse.

I had to admit she looked good in it though.

"You look amazing, beautiful, stunning," I tried to make it seem as true as possible, as if I meant all of those things.

I tried to follow President Snow's advice about making it looked like I loved Rose, but it was so much harder than I thought.

"Oh, Beau!" she smiled at me and turned to the woman, "I'll take it!"

"And the matching shoes?"

"Of course!"

"And, as you know, every purchase of ten thousand comes with a purse. Would you like to pick one out now or later?"

"Now."


	21. Chapter 21

_**Drew,**_

Alecca didn't need to lead me to the people waiting.

I knew where it was because I had the moment I said goodbye to my father imprinted on my brain. I had known it would hurt, but it was like a completely different blow this time because I was leaving, not being taken away.

It felt weird to think that the only thing that had really changed with us all was that Alecca and Future were together.

Otherwise we were the same.

Sesame was away from Alecca, working in the war and wondering how her friend was doing.

Loco was just as drunk as before.

And I was without Oaklea.

Noticing that her boyfriend was tense, Future wrapped her hand around Alecca's and let out a weak smile for his sake. She was trying to calm him down and get him to stop babying me, but I doubted she would get her way, even if he did do almost everything she told him to.

And it wouldn't matter anyway.

He brought me back to District Thirteen, and he knew that I couldn't do anything.

But he wanted to make sure that I wouldn't.

And, when I got to the door that would lead me to where my family was waiting, I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Peeta," I whispered as I ran into his arms, and my best friend of almost all time wrapped me up in his arms and hugged me tightly.

We had been friends for almost as long as I could remember. He had first announced his crush on Katniss to me, and he had first come to me to tell me about how the entire Arena was fake. And he had been the first person I told about my feelings for Oaklea.

Peeta and I told each other everything, which is why it had felt so weird to be apart from him for so long.

"Thank God you're alright," Peeta put his hands on my shoulders and looked down at me.

I wasn't sure what he saw.

The little girl with bright he became friends with in town.

One of his closest friends.

The girl who everyone thought would marry her brother and give the Mallarks the long-awaited daughter they all wanted.

The tribute for District Twelve in the 75th Hunger Games.

Or the idiot who got hurt in the war.

I wasn't sure, but I knew that I still saw him as the handsome baker's son I had become friends with so long ago.

"Everyone missed you, Drew. I'm pretty sure that Katniss even missed your face around here."

I doubted that but smiled in acceptance to the compliment.

"I missed you guys, too."

"Come on, Annalisa has been dying to see you, and Lillian wants to talk to you," Peeta laced his fingers through mine and started pulling me off.

"Lillian?"

Lillian was my new sister-in-law of a few months. She and my older brother Jonah had been friends since they were kids, and he had been in love with her since before I was born. They started dating about a year ago, and my brother had just been waiting and waiting for the perfect time to propose. And, when that didn't come, he proposed because he was afraid they would die and didn't want to die without proposing. Then Annalisa was scared to death I would die in the army, so they had the wedding the day before I left.

I was happy for my brother and for Lillian, but I didn't see what they would have to tell me.

Peeta smiled as we entered the area where everyone was waiting.

Before I could even take account of who was there, I was tackled by a hug.

"Oh my God! Oh my God! You're alive! I think you grew taller how are you feeling? How is the cut? Will there be a scar? You have no idea how worried we were when we heard, Drew. You almost yourself killed, Drew! _Killed_!"

"I missed you, too, Annalisa," I smiled at my older sister, trying to wriggle out of her tight grasp.

"Annalisa, you're _crushing_ her."

"Shut up, Jonah."

Annalisa let me go, and I had to admit that it was great to see her, even if I'm pretty sure she broke my rib.

I looked to my older brother and he smiled down at me like I was that little baby that my parents introduced him to. I loved my brother, and I absolutely loved seeing him this happy…

"Hey, Shortie," my older brother wrapped me up in a hug, and I smiled as I took a deep breath of the signature Jonah smell, a mixture of Lillian's perfume and the smell of a pharmacy. As a kid, I kept trying to figure out what the smell was, but I gave up after a while and named it the _Jonah Smell_.

"Hey, Big Foot."

Jonah ruffled my hair, and I forced myself out of his grasp to look at his wife.

"So what's the big news?"

Jonah and Lillian smiled at each other, and Jonah took her hand with a smile for her to tell me.

"I'm pregnant," Lillian set her hand over her stomach, and I gasped.

"Y-you're pregnant?"

"I found out two days ago," Lillian smiled wide, almost glowing, "You're going to be an aunt!"

"Congratulations," I hugged my sister-in law, and she laughed with happiness as she hugged me.

"Since you're alive, it looks like we can name the baby anything instead of Drew."

I nudged my older brother.

"Let's not be mean about her being alive."

I felt my eyes water.

I spun around and almost crushed my father in a tight hug.

"Daddy," I whispered, and he closed his eyes as he hugged me.

I bit my tongue as I began to wonder how much I must have worried.

"Baby Drew."

Baby Drew.

He still saw me as that, and, for the first time since I was ten years old, I didn't have a problem with that.

"Are you alright?" he asked, and I nodded.

"Just a little scar," I lied.

I felt like I was either about to puke or pass out, but I wasn't about to tell him that.

"_The Strong One_," my father smiled proudly, his eyes full of relief that I was alright.

"Yeah, _The Strong One_," I nodded, and this time I knew I was about to puke.

I promised myself I wouldn't tell him.

I wouldn't tell him that night in District Seven and definitely not the next morning when President Snow tracked me down. I wouldn't tell him anything…

I wanted him to think that I was just a star on location, filming all day and being protected all night.

"There are some people who wantto see you," my dad smiled, and he pointed to the edge of the room, where Skye was walking in with a baby on her hip and Robin was being overprotective of both girls.

"Drew!" Skye smiled, and she handed Taylor to Robin before running to me and tackling me in a hug, almost knocking me over.

"Skye, oh my God! You look amazing? Are you sure you just had a baby?"

"See! Drew knows how to compliment, Robin," Skye put her hands on her hips, and Robin tried not to laugh.

I raised my eyebrows at the two of them, and Skye looked down and blushed.

"Oh my God," I smiled.

"It's not like you and Oaklea or anything. But, you know…" Skye smiled as she looked back to Robin playing with Taylor, "I think we have _something."_

"It finally happened," I laughed, "How?"

"Well Robin was always around for Taylor, you know. He just loves that little baby," Skye smiled wider, "And it just happened. Drew, I am so happy. I really am. I mean, I miss Oakie and Taylor, but Robin… Robin is just… so…"

Skye blushed when she realized she was daydreaming.

"Mind if I cut in?"

I smiled as I looked at Robin.

I had always known that he was the father-type. But it was amazing to see him in action.

"Hey, Robby," I gave him a small hug, careful not to disturb the baby in his arms.

"Say hey to your godmother, Taylor," Skye smiled, and the baby's blue eyes stared at me.

"Hey, Taylor."

_**I have had this written for a while, but I had block on what to write with Oaklea. I am doing to work on this. Sorry it took so long.**_


	22. Chapter 22

_**Drew,**_

As I rocked the baby in my arms, her blue eyes slowly began to blink closed into sleep.

I don't think I had ever seen such a beautiful baby. She was like a replica of her mother but with her late father's nose. Looking at Taylor reminded me of the pictures of the beautiful children of the stars from the Capitol. It was easy to see that she would be just as beautiful as her mother if not more, something I barely knew could happen.

In her few months of life, she had already gotten golden curls, and her eyes were just as piercing and blue as they had been before I left. She had thick lips. And they seemed to naturally be rose red. Her skin had never seen the sun, and she was a delicate porcelain.

From the moment I saw her, I had seen easily that she was Skye's daughter.

But, staring at her, I only could see Oaklea.

Something made me feel sick as I thought about the first time I had seen him, standing on the Chariot and undoubtedly staring at me. I was his competition. I was the one he was afraid of.

I wasn't sure how we went from him wondering if his death would come at my hand to falling in love with me.

But, then again, I wasn't even sure how I went from sizing him up in training to see if I should let someone else kill him or get it out of the way to risking everything for him.

I almost jumped when I heard a gentle nock on the door.

When I left, Robin moved out of our old apartment, and, when I came back, I moved in with him. It wasn't long until Skye and Taylor were in with us. And I honestly wouldn't have it any other way.

I gently put Taylor down in her crib. There were two small bedrooms, and I shared bunk beds with Robin while Taylor and Skye had the other. I pressed the button on the door for it to open, and Skye smiled at me as it slid open.

She had lost basically all of her baby weight, and what was left happened to look better. She was still just as beautiful as she had been for the interviews in her big teased up hair and peach dress, though it did feel odd to see her with the same white skin as her daughter instead of the warm tan I knew her for.

She and Robin both worked District 13, but Coin was very clear that she didn't want me to do anything. I had always known she didn't like me, but I never knew it was to this degree. Some of the time, I was scared to eat my food in case she poisoned it and claimed that my injuries came back to haunt me.

So I stayed home with Taylor.

"Look at my little baby," Skye smiled as she came to the crib, smiling as she pushed her daughter's golden curls out of her closed eyes.

_My little baby._

It was hard for me to remember that Skye really had a baby.

She looked so young, so innocent.

But she had already been married and become a widow. She had already gone into the Hunger Games. She had already lost her brother and risked everything to go against the capitol. She had already had a baby, and she had already fallen in love again.

It was hard to feel sorry for myself when she was sitting beside me, just as upbeat and smiling as if nothing had happened.

"She's been good all day," I told Skye, "She's such a good little baby."

"But Robin spoils her rotten. Sometimes I wonder how she'll turn out if he keeps up with that," Skye smiled, kissing the top of her daughter's head as she turned on the baby monitor and lead me to the small living room outside the door.

Neither of them had announced to me that they were dating, not that they needed to.

It was easy to see, and it was almost as easy to see that they were falling in love with each other.

"How was work?" I asked, and Skye began to recount to me her day in the kitchen.

As one of the only ones who could actually make the food taste good, she had to work a lot, and we were all used to it.

If anything, I was thankful for it.

After the meltdown she had when Oaklea was taken, she needed something to take her mind off of him. With Robin and Taylor at home and a busy work day, she didn't have any time to think about Oaklea, something I had to admit I was jealous of.

I listened to Skye as she told me everything, twirling her blonde hair as she told me.

"I never would have thought of any of this a few years ago, you know," Skye smiled, "Not working. Or loving it either. Having married and lost Taylor. Having his child. Going into the Hunger Games. Meeting you…"

Skye's smile slightly faded, and a sour taste covered my mouth.

"And Oakie."

I felt like I might throw up.

I thought about him all the time, especially when I was with Taylor or Skye.

But no one spoke of him.

It was kind of our silent rule, and it had just been broken.

"I know that's why you went out there, Drew. You may not admit it, but I know," she tapped her fingernail against her arm, a trait she and Oaklea both had when they were nervous. She blew out her breath before she met my eyes.

Another shocking thing about Skye.

She was a grown-up with grown-up responsibilities. She worked hard. She was in a kind-of-serious relationship with someone she loved. And she had a baby.

But she was still just a kid like us.

"Did you see him?"

I wanted to lie, but I didn't.

It was killing me not to tell.

"Yeah, I did."

She nodded, probably expecting that.

"Did he see you? Or did you just see him? Or…?"

"Well, I ran into him. When I killed General Lucas. His roof was beside the tree I needed to climb to get out, and he was on the roof."

"D-Did you speak? Did he sound alright?" Skye was eager for knowledge on her brother.

I had to admit that I would be the same way.

"He was fine," I admitted, a lump forming in my throat, "His voice was the same, sadder… He looked different, too."

I pushed my hair behind my ear, not sure how to tell her about the kiss.

"What did you talk about?"

"We didn't talk much…" I admitted, touching my lips to see if the buzz from just kissing him was still there.

_It wasn't…_

"He kissed me. Then someone called him, and the soldiers got close. So I left."

It was tempting to tell her about President Snow, but I didn't want to worry her.

Skye smiled weakly, and she absently began to braid her hair.

"I miss him so much."

As I sat there, I realized I needed to call upon my old nickname and become _The Strong One_ yet again.

It was amazing to think of how much I didn't feel like _The Strong One_ right now.

I was beginning to doubt I would ever really be her again.

For the cameras, I could do it.

But at home?

No, even if I did get Oaklea back, I was damaged. I was bruised and battered, and I would never be able to stare into danger and not feel fear rise above me. Maybe I could push past it, forget it for a while. But I would still have my moments when I was weak and frail.

I missed by strength.

I missed being able to push it aside.

"We'll be okay, Skye. He'll be back with us, and we'll go to District Four. And we'll get away from this," I comfortingly squeezed her hand, "And Oaklea and I will babysit your numerous children. And I am not getting pregnant more than three times, no matter how many nieces or nephews you want, okay?"

She let out a small smile, and she hugged me tightly.

"I love you, Drew."

"Love you, too, Skye."

_At least one us can be happy right now… _

_**Oaklea,**_

Outside my window, things began to change.

The temperature got colder.

It slowly progressed to winter, and everything slowly became more and more mundane.

My schedule became more and more of the same, and it reached a point where I could just do it. My conversations with Nicolt became less and less, and I often depended on Isis for things I really wanted to know.

My highlight of the day was when she would take care of me in the morning, making sure my hair was dyed well and that my contacts looked right. Occasionally, she even would sneak in pictures of my little niece, Taylor.

And then there was my favorite picture I held under my pillow.

It was small, small enough that Isis had been able to sneak it to me in a new suit she was adding glitter to for an interview. I had found it by accident when I was putting mints in my pocket, and I had quickly put it under my pillow before the guards got to me to escort me.

The picture had a grey background, the dreary color of the walls in District Thirteen. In the center of the picture, there were two girls.

One was a toddler with golden curls, pale skin, blue eyes, and ruby lips. She looked so much like her mother that it was scary, and she had a big giggle on her lips as she looked into the camera. _Taylor_. Then there was the other…

Her long black hair was pulled into a ponytail behind her head, and her green eyes didn't seem to match her smile. They were still sad, still reclusive. But, for now, she did seem slightly happy as she held Taylor close to her, and made the little girl wave to the camera.

_Drew…_

I couldn't decide if seeing her hurt me or made me happy.

Either way, it stirred something inside me.

It honestly made me feel alive again like the boy Oaklea underneath all this make-up and glittery suits. Maybe it _was_ hurting more than it was helping, but feeling something was better than nothing. So I looked at it anyway.

There were days where I could only bring myself back by looking at that picture. Time just… _passed_. I didn't really think. I just followed my schedule, smiled for the cameras, and I didn't speak in the car. I just stared out of the window, my eyes going glassy as I stared at the passing Capitol. The autographs became natural, and I didn't think about it. I became a robot.

When I had a job, I did it, and I seemed human.

But, afterwards, it was like I was shut off again.

"Ew! No, give me the gold ones!" Rose yelled at her assistants, "No, those are _yellow!_ No those are _Wheat!_ I am_ nawt_ Sesame Maroon!"

Her screams were loud and high pitched, but I was so used to them that I tuned them out.

I was dressed in a suit made of leaves, and I was standing there waiting for my interviews where the main subject would be the latest boy bands and he might bring up the war. But I doubted it.

"Ten bucks she'll pick the red shoes she was supposed to wear in the first place."

Isis laughed, and she brushed through my hair one more time to give me the perfect-but-also-messy style Beaumont was famous for.

Isis has created the gown for tonight. We were going to the big gala after interviewing with Cesar Flickerman, but I couldn't really remember what this holiday was?

The Festival of the Leaves or something. I remember it had something to do with saying goodbye to our golden leaves as they leave us for the winter.

All I remember about it was that it was really a day that people used to throw a party and get drunk.

But Isis had gone all out for us anyway.

My suit wasn't made of real leaves, though a new designer Hernado had tried it and finally given up after the leaves wouldn't sew. But it looked like it was made of real leaves, and she had made my blonde hair look less beachy and a little more golden. But most of the attention had been on Rose.

She had died her hair back red for the season, and there was a twinge of orange. It would go back to golden tomorrow, but, for the night, she was orange and red. Her gown was made of the same fake leaves of mine, and it showed whatever shoes she would chose. Her lips were a dramatic red with a touch of nude, and her make-up was very fall.

"At the end of the night, she will look like an angelic winter angel. I already previewed her outfit. And you will look like an angel, too. Can you pull it off?"

"If _Rose_ can be an angel, _I_ can do it, too."

"Good luck, Beamont. You'll need it."

By the time we got to the stage, Isis owed me ten bucks.

Parading around in her platform red heels, she waved out to the crowd, and she blew kisses to everyone.

They ate it up, and I heard a bunch of fan girls scream and a few faint as I came out on the stage.

When Rose and I sat on the couch in the building in front of the gala, we took our usual positions. We sat beside each other with Rose closer to the edge of the stage and me closer to Flickerman. I held her hand, and she angled her body to lean towards me while not turning away from the crowd.

We were perfectly rehearsed…

I suddenly wondered if all of those couples on the screen had been like us. Were they just good actors who didn't leave their trade off of the camera or the stage?

Our interview ran the usual course.

Flickerman talked about the episode of some reality show I was recently on, and they showed a commercial for the new Soap Opera that Rose had gotten a role on that would stay for half of a season as the beautiful model trying to steal the star's kind-of-ex boyfriend, Xavier.

They talked about our relationship, too.

"We're wonderful. I mean, I know that sounds corny. But we're really just wonderful!" Rose smiled her bubbly smile, "I don't mean to get ahead of myself or anything, but I really think we have a future!"

_A future of me strangling you_, I wanted to say, but I just kissed the top of her head and kept smiling.

"Do you ever get nervous, Beaumont? About love, I mean? You did just get out of a long relationship after all?" Flickerman leaned in like this was a serious question.

"I mean, I do," I told him, "All of this is intimidating to tell you the truth. After my last relationship, I was looking for something fun and light. But…"

This time, truth took to my words for the first time in a long time.

For a second there, it was almost like there was a second reality I was escaping to. I could almost see it, years and miles away from here. I could see a little girl with long black hair and familiar green eyes, staring up at me expectantly like Skye had done when I used to tell her stories.

"_Daddy, why did you fall in love with Mommy when you did?" the little girl asked me._

"When you meet the right person, things around you don't matter," I told Flickerman and the world, but it felt like it was only to that little girl in my mind, "Your past doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Things just make way for you to be with that person…"

Everyone in the crowd swooned, and their applause and the kiss on my cheek from Rose brought me back from that second reality with the little girl asking me about her mother.

Things progressed, and everyone loved it.

Looking back on it, I do feel bad for everyone in the Capitol that night.

They didn't know that this was their last big night of innocence. This was their night where they could dance around and not think about the war. They could be what they had been raised to be for just a while longer. And they didn't know that this was basically it for them.

Maybe I would have indulged them a little more. Given Rose a little more PDA for the magazines to gush over. Smiled wide as it became winter when the last leaf fell and dressed as an angel. And I may have stuck around at the party longer instead of hurriedly getting into the limo to wash all of this make-up off and get some actual sleep.

But I didn't.

None of us new that the war would soon come upon us.

And none of us ever saw any of this coming…

* * *

_**I know it took forever, but here it is, Future.**_

_**And it is a special gift since it looks like Obama is going to win…**_

_**D-':**_


	23. Chapter 23

_**Oaklea,**_

As the season changed into official winter, people went crazy going shopping.

Every year, it seemed to grow and grow, and this winter seemed a bit crazier. With all of the stuff happening in the last few months, the Capitol tried to distract with new stars, new trends, and new gadgets for everyone. This holiday season showed that their plan had worked well for the people of the Capitol while maybe not anyone else.

I think Rose spent my mother's salary for a month on clothes, and that was including just how high of a salary she had. This was also the only time of year she actually wore _clothing_, though she still did try her hardest to show as much skin as possible without freezing. It just proved_ harder_.

I remembered this rush from my time in the Capitol, and I remembered the one year I went out with my mother shopping. Everywhere you looked, you saw stars getting a photo-op, and everyone was trying to look like an angel, an ice queen, or like a human Christmas Tree. Even my mother, who dressed relatively conservative for the Capitol, went all out. Last year, she decorated her golden ringlets with rubies and emeralds, and she spent bundles buying bright red suits and flattering green cocktail dresses.

This year, Rose wanted to look like the stars in the sky she said, so she went searching to get everything reflective within the city. And I got stuck coming along for the photos.

This is our fourth shopping trip, and it was early in the cold morning when we left.

At six in the morning, Isis woke us up, and she got us ready. I was wrapped up in parkas and so much warm clothes that I was actually _hot_. Rose had her hair golden and wrapped in a precise bun behind her head, and her outfit was pure white with a deep V-Neck to show an expensive snowflake necklace. Her lips were white and covered with glitter, and she shone in the winter sun like all of those lights that twinkled on the homes of the Capitol Citizens.

It was nine AM when we got into the limo, and it took us another hour to get to the uber-expensive shopping area of town.

Nicolt, wearing a pristine and shiny white suit, smiled at us from across the limo. Her hair was dyed red, and her lips were green. A few months ago, I would have laughed at her. But now she felt tame compared to everyone else.

I couldn't wrap my head around everything that had happened this year. I had lived three different lives. I had been an awaiting tribute, scared for my life and my little sister's life. I had been happier than I thought possible, even thinking about proposing. And now I was a depressed captive…

Nicolt tapped on her tablet as she read off our schedule, and Rose listened attentively, making notes on her expensive white smartphone.

"And there will be cameras?" Rose asked before pressing the button for the door to slide open and let us out, making sure this wasn't a waste of time.

Nicolt's jaw tightened, not that Rose noticed.

Nicolt's thin patience had worn, and she couldn't stand anything Rose did any longer.

"Yes, there _will_ be cameras."

Rose smiled, and she swallowed the rest of her Champaign, and Nicolt straightened my suit. While Nicolt wasn't looking, Rose downed _Buzz_ real quick and grabbed a box of her latest craze (cigarettes to make her look thin under all of these layers as she explained to everyone), shoving them into her purse with a golden lighter.

"Good luck you two," Nicolt leaned back in her seat, "I will pick you up in a few hours."

The doors slid open, and Rose hurried out.

I struggled to keep up with her as she seemed to fly over to a jewelry store, even though she was in four inch heels. It was a relief to finally get inside and stand still as Rose proceeded to pick out the most expensive things in the store.

After three flashes from the paparazzi and millions in diamonds wrapped up in two little baggies, we went on to the next store where she spent another million or two on a revealing white evening gown she would undoubtedly wear once…_maybe._

"This would look wonderful on you, Beaumont!" Rose held up a golden suit, and some giggled. Some took pictures, like the paparazzi, and girls swooned. And, of course, people rushed to get the suit for their boyfriend.

For the pictures, she bought the suit (wrong size of course). Then she bought me a watch and kissed my cheek before we went on the next store.

Over the next few hours, I spent most of my time looking out at the window, and I began to notice something.

There were less people.

Less political figures, too, I also noticed.

And, while the citizens seemed to be happy, there was an area of sadness around us as well, especially with the few politicians I saw. They rushed towards one direction, all with briefcases, and it took me a while to realize where they were going.

The government building beyond the shopping area.

What was so important they couldn't wait through the traffic?

I wasn't sure, and it was tempting to sneak away from Rose.

I would have if it was of my own free will.

But I knew what would happen.

I was never left to my own devices, no matter how I was given the illusion of freedom.

"Let's grab lunch," Rose told me, wrapping her hand around mine as she led me to weave through all of the people to an urban and _exclusive_ restaurant everyone had been talking about.

The long lines for the hostess looked impossible, but Rose pulled me through to the woman.

"Can I get a table for two?"

She gave Rose a look of distain, but then her unnaturally green eyes looked to me.

Her eyes widened, and she let out an intimidating red-lipstick smile. Her skin was tinted golden, and her hair was black and held out of her eyes with seasonal flowers. Her dress was the same as everyone else who worked there, long and white.

"Come with me," her voice was silky and seductive, and she motioned with her hand for us to follow.

Rose let out a little huff, and she wrapped her arm around mine to show we were together as we followed her into an elevator.

The elevator was shaped like a bullet, round at the top and flat at the bottom. It was clear, letting you see everything around you. It began without her pressing anything, and we all rode in silence until the doors opened again to a fully white room full of waiters and floating carts full of food and people enjoying their meals.

The hostess stopped us by a table, and we sat.

"Your waiter will be with you," she didn't look at Rose, only smiling at me, and she walked out, her bare feet silent on the white floor.

Rose had a sour face as she caught me looking at her.

"You're mine remember," she almost growled.

I rolled my eyes, and I looked to the actually happy people in the odd restaurant.

Then Rose's face turned triumphant and cocky.

"What about Drew? Are you being tempted by a woman of the Capitol?" her smile reminded me of that of a snake.

My anger to Rose was growing and had been for longer than I would like to admit. Now I couldn't handle it.

"I was going to marry her, Rose," I almost growled, leaning over the table to whisper at her.

Her face fell.

"No, I _am_ going to marry her. So me looking at a waitress really shouldn't bother you."

Her lips pursed, full of anger and also sadness.

"I am in control here, Oaklea," her hiss hurt my ears to hear.

She noticed another waitress coming towards us, and Rose leaned back and put a pleasing smile on her lips for everyone else, making me lean back. But my eyes stayed trained on her.

"What would you like to drink?"

"Two glasses of Champaign please," Rose smiled.

To anyone else, she looked happy and serene in a moment away from the shopping for the holidays, enjoying her time with her boyfriend.

But I knew she was thinking of how she would get even for what I had done to her.

_**Drew,**_

Eventually, my time in the close quarters in District Thirteen stopped feeling like captivity. In fact, I began to like it. My schedule of taking care of Taylor was refreshing from my schedule of being a war figure.

As time passed, my make-up and "improvements" began to fade. My silky black blowout turned back into the dull ponytail it used to be. My skin became pale from lack of sunlight, and I began to look like most everyone else in District Thirteen.

The more time I spent in our compartment, the more I forgot about the war. The more I forgot about everyone I loved who had died. The more I forgot about everything…

But I had reminders. The war came back to me every time I saw the ugly scar on my leg. The more deaths I remembered came when I saw their grieving families. And Oaklea never left me, no matter how hard I tried.

Our lives never varied or strayed from any of our schedules, and there was nothing to distract me from him.

Robin woke us all up in the morning, and Skye got Taylor dressed up. We all went to breakfast where I spoke with our friends. Skye and my sister-in-law talked about their pregnancies, and I got my time with Future and Alecca, who were both working hard. They usually looked at me with worry, wondering how I was handling being cooped up in the compartment with a baby as my only company, but I let them know I was fine.

When breakfast was over, my day got pretty dull. I went back to my compartment with Taylor while Robin and Skye went to work, and I took care of Skye for the next four hours until lunch. Lunch follows the same pattern as breakfast, and I watched Taylor until everyone got off work.

This used to be tedious, and I had trouble to be one of those girls many of District Twelve had tried to raise me to be. I tried to knit, and I sewed up clothes. I cleaned and took care of the baby, even taking an occasion to draw when my boredom got desperate. But, when I had finally gotten into the groove of it all, I was called to President Snow.

Twenty-four hours later, Skye was holding back the tears in the dressing room as she rocked her daughter.

My team had basically worked through the night, reprimanding me for getting so _"out of shape, Dah-ling"_ as they repeatedly told me. They covered every inch of my dark hair in dye that was labeled, _Midnight Black_. She covered my skin in a light tan, and they even put golden tattoos of sweeping branches on my arms that would fade in out a month. My eyelashes were made extra-long, and my hair had extensions, too.

Futurina's hair was dyed rose red. Her skin was kept pale, and she wore dramatic make-up. There were no tattoos for her, but her team had been going after her to apply facials and make-up and even some horribly painful lip-plumper.

And Robin was also supped up. His natural dark tan was restored, and it basically took the entire twenty-four hours to get him to put on make-up. They basically strapped him down to do it.

Skye was the only one who looked the same…

"This or this?" my new clothing stylist, Nila, held up two dresses. One was backless and barely there. The other was more intimidating. It was long and black, and it was revealing though. And I pointed to it reluctantly.

Quickly, my hair stylist began to apply glitter to my blowout, and, while Robin's tattoo was being touched up with darker ink, Skye took Taylor away from being with him to awkwardly sitting on a bench, her lower lip trembling.

"Hurry up," Ramma whispered in my ear, nodding towards Skye, and I quickly stood before she changed her mind.

A few months ago, I would have been self-conscious about walking around in front of strangers and eve good friends basically naked, but I was used to it by now. Anyway, my new scar was so horrible to all of them that they at least let me wear shorts all the time now.

Skye's blue eyes looked to me as I sat beside her on the bench.

For once, I wasn't sure what to say.

"You're crying," I finally blurted out.

She let out a small smile.

"You're golden," she nodded towards my tattoos, letting out a weak but beautiful smile.

She was so scared, and I had to admit that I knew why.

Her brother had been taken on a mission much smaller than this, and there wasn't much attention on him. But, now what she had left was being shipped off on a giant mission with every single eye on us. Our fate was held in our luck, and I didn't want her to know that.

But Skye wasn't a stupid girl.

"Dah-ling, we muh-ust guh-et you into your duh-ress," someone yelled at me across the room, and I frowned, almost growling.

Skye looked back to me, smiling weakly.

"I will help," Skye handed Taylor to Robin, and Skye picked up the dress from the hanger. She led me to the dressing room, which felt unnecessary since everyone in this room had seen me naked, but I followed after her.

There was a silence as I took off my clothes, careful not to mess anything up, and I was stepping into the dress when she finally said something.

"It's weird how you can turn into Strong One like this," she smiled weakly, pulling the dress up to my waist before she moved my shiny black blowout to the side so it wouldn't get stuck in the zipper, "I like you more when you look like Drew. Not really _District Thirteen Drew_. But the real you."

I hadn't been the _real Drew _in so long I almost forgot what it felt like. I had forgotten what it was like to pull on my favorite pair of heavy jeans and my leather trench coat in the morning. I forgot what it was like to pass through the musty storeroom to get to the stairs and our apartment upstairs. I forgot what it felt like to wake up on my stiff mattress in the morning to the sound of my sister singing as she got dressed for work. I had even forgotten how much the brush hurt as my sister got me ready for school.

I could see it in my mind, but I had forgotten the feelings.

"I will miss you," Skye's blue eyes wider as she pulled up the sleeveless dress, and I had to suck in as she zipped it up, which happened to be the only thing keeping my mascara from running with my tears.

"You, too," I nodded, letting out a wince as my skin got stuck in the zipper.

"Be careful."

I let out a weak smile.

"I have Robin to protect me."

Her body tensed.

I had almost forgotten.

With me and Oaklea gone, Robin was the only person from her past still around who could take care of her, which is what Skye desperately needed.

"We'll be alright, I promise," I turned around, the thin and flowy dress spinning with me, and I held both of her hands comfortingly.

"I know…" Skye lied.

"I will bring him home, Skye… And…" I took a deep breath, "Maybe I'll bring myself back, too. I'm not alright. And, you can pretend to buy it when I say it, but you know me. You know I am not okay."

She nodded, knowing I was right, and she squeezed my hands.

"We will be home soon," I took on the role of the strong one that I did every time I put on that dark eyeliner and immense amount of glitter.

"Maybe even before Christmas. I want everyone to be there on Taylor's first Christmas."

I doubted that, but I smiled anyway.

"Maybe, Skye."

"Drew! Skye! Hurry up!" Ramma yelled.

"Coming," I moaned, and I straightened my tight dress as I walked out, Skye following behind me as she rushed over to see if the make-up team had put tattoos on her daughter or dyed her skin.

* * *

_**It is almost over! AHH!**_

_**Anyway, hope you liked this, Future, since you are basically the only one reading.**_


	24. Chapter 24

_**Drew,**_

The three of us were a sight as we stood by the safest wreckage they could find of the war. Everyone had been safely made out, but you wouldn't know it looking at the area.

There were ashes in the air. A lower-end shop was burned to a crisp, and a dry cleaners had completely collapsed in the Capitol. The streets were charred, and the sky was grey today. Everything felt bleak, but, deeper in, you could see the beautiful shining city.

It was my first time being back in the Capitol since I was a tribute in the Hunger Games, and I had to admit that it was even more amazing with a small blanket of snow to top the skyscrapers and mansions. Everything was so shiny…

It was so different from District Twelve that you almost doubted the existence of District Twelve. The idea of poverty, dirtiness, or anything less of architectural perfection felt so far away in a place like District Twelve.

Seeing the war made it easier to stand the city, I'll admit. It finally felt like a real place, not that I liked any of this. I honestly hated attacking this ignorant and cruel but innocent civilians, especially having none Oaklea.

They weren't all horrible…

Just their leaders, but we punished them for it.

I had to admit I hated that. I mean, the Capitol did that to us because of the first rebellion. Shouldn't we try to do everything to stay away from the way things went before?

I was snapped out of that when Ramma motioned for me to stand up straighter.

My dress flapped in the cold wind, and I was freezing. The dress fit me well, and it was black and sleeveless with the top looking like it was singed. They made the edges look like golden coals you just bring out of a fire. The bottom was singed off like the top of it. My arms had golden tattoos, and my hair had snow in it now.

Beside me, Future looked a little dulled down, being in dim colors instead of the usual bright. Her hair was braided to the side of her head to become a bun. We were wearing the same dress, and she was wearing golden lipstick.

In between us, Alecca stood tall and proud in his black jumpsuit, and he would have been wearing golden lipstick. But he just kept wiping it off, so they let it go.

"Perfect!" Rama smiled, and the camera began to flash.

I stood there, letting the light from the camera wash over me.

I hated it now.

I had never loved the flash of a camera, but I couldn't stand it now.

"And that's a wrap! Now, I need you to hurry up getting dressed. We are going back to the house tonight."

The house was at the edge of the capitol, an old mansion that the Rebels had taken and used to house their generals and to become a war office.

They had moved us in as soon as we got to the Capitol, afraid of my last encounter when I went to war.

Unless Ramma was with us, only Alecca got to leave. I spent most of my time in my room in the back of the house, looking out of the window to the lake leading away from the Capitol.

This was the first time in almost a week I had been out of the mansion, and we were only here for photo shoots. Ramma had kept a close eye on me, and I had to admit she was right to.

It was killing me to stand here in the Capitol. I was far away from everyone that kept me grounded, and the person I loved most was just a few blocks away. He was in that house I could see in the distance, that horrible mansion. He had just gone shopping with Rose in those stores. Magazines had his face plastered on them everywhere.

He was so close but so far away…

_Too far away._

"You must be freezing," one of my stylist wrapped a parka around each of us, and we were all looking at each other with a look of freedom after a day of make-up and pictures.

Our freedom wasn't granted yet though.

We were rushed into a tent where our make-up girls ran around to get our outfits preserved from the dust, our make-up off our face, the hairspray washed out, and remove any trace of the people in those pictures. Normal seventeen year olds would have a problem with changing and standing around in underwear in front of each other, but only Future blushed when they took off her black dress and left her in her underwear in front of Alecca.

I didn't mind at all that Alecca or Chad saw me like this. They had seen me wearing less, and it didn't seem to matter any more.

By the time they were done with the three of us, we were wearing warm black jeans, grey tee shirts, and big white parkas. Future looked like something from a Capitol Christmas movie, her red hair tumbling out of the jacket and her cheeks flushed. I looked like the intimidating _Strong One_. And Alecca looked like he could have killed someone for putting him in that outfit.

He forgot about his anger though when Future wrapped her hand around his.

Jealousy hit me hard as it often did.

It wasn't that I wanted Alecca or Future or anything.

It was that I wanted what they had. I hadn't felt like that since I lost Oaklea, and I missed it desperately.

"If I was you, I would cut that out," Loco came up to us from the corner, where he had been watching and shaking his head, "Especially when you're wearing white, Future. You two might have to end up with a wedding Ramma produces if you keep this up."

Future and Alecca blushed, and they both stuck their hands in their pockets.

"Stop teasing them, Loco."

"I know you're in a bad mood because we're taking you back in captivity," Loco smiled playfully as he lit a cigarette, "But don't take it out on me."

Loco had quit smoking for a while, but, with this all going on, I understood why he wanted something to calm him down.

We had gotten close since we started working together, and I was thankful for him. He was someone who understood what I was going through, _everything _I was going through. He also shared the occasional madness due to President Snow, and we agreed heartily on that.

"Loco, you know it isn't healthy to smoke," Future crossed her arms.

Loco shrugged as he look another long breath of his cigarette.

"Because I was already so healthy with the drugs and alcohol."

"I thought you said you quit morphling!"

"I did," Loco raised his hands in surrender after throwing his cigarette to the road to put it out with his foot, "But I did it for five years. That doesn't exactly do the best things to your body."

Future shook her head, and I smiled at Loco.

I was about to say something when Ramma suddenly appeared at the opening of the tent.

"Come on, the car is here. Let's go, let's go."

She motioned for us to hurry, and we all made our way to the big black SUV.

"Okay, Mom," Loco rolled his eyes at Ramma, and Ramma's eyes narrowed on him.

"I smell smoke. Have you been smoking?"

"We're in a warzone. _Of course_ you smell smoke!"

"Not _that_ kind of smoke."

Loco pulled his last cigarette out of the many boxes he had gotten from a nearby closed convience store.

His anger boiling, he lit it, and he blew a big puff of smoke in her face.

They had once been completely in love with each other, but their relationship quickly turned sour. They stopped liking each other, and they didn't speak much. But, over the past few weeks, this grew into hate, and they couldn't hide it.

"You're sitting in the back."

The back meant sitting in the third row of the car, holding Chad's camera equipment while the make-up and beauty supplies poked him in the back.

"Whatever," he climbed in, and Chad happily got into the passenger seat.

If anyone was enjoying Ramma and Loco not getting along, it was him.

He was suddenly getting the front seat and getting better rooms because Loco was getting punished with the worst.

Alecca draped his arm over Future in the car, and she leaned on him as he kissed the top of his head.

For the millionth time, I felt like the third wheel, but I was used to it.

In district thirteen, I got it from Skye and Robin. I got it from my brother and new sister-in-law. I got it from Finnick and Annie. I got it from Peeta and Katniss occasionally, though not official. And I definitely got it from happy Futurina and Alecca.

While I didn't like it, I was beginning to accept it.

I sat there, staring out the windows to the soldiers in the war. I wished I could have been a real soldier, or at least not wasted war money on make-up and pictures. Eventually, we drove past though. The car kept humming along, and the radio signal eventually died off, which was a relief.

Finally, we pulled up to an old mansion, and the car pulled into the garage since we weren't allowed outside.

Well, _I_ wasn't allowed outside.

As soon as the car pulled to a stop, Ramma jumped out, and she hurried us all to our area, letting the door bolt behind us when we got there.

An old paranoid man lived here before us, and certain areas of the house locked behind you. It was the safest place for us, but it also made me feel like I was in captivity.

No, I was in captivity.

I had no clue how Oaklea could be handling this, especially with much tighter restrictions than me.

I worried so much for him…. Would he still be my Oaklea? Would he be stable unlike how I had been after his disappearance? Would he be the same person we all knew and loved? Would he remember everything we had together?

Would he still love me?

"You need a drink," Loco suddenly wrapped his arm around me, and he smiled.

"She's not old enough," Ramma told him quickly, "If it went by maturity, sure. But then you wouldn't be able to have any."

"Please get wasted and shut up, okay?" Loco rolled his eyes, pulling me into his room, and I followed after him.

Loco's room was pretty comfortable, and he hadn't trashed it yet, most likely because he knew Ramma probably wouldn't have it cleaned. There was a mini fridge stocked with only a bottle of scotch and ginger ale, and the room felt more barren than the rest.

But I had been coming in here enough to know the chair in the corner I loved most. I curled up in it, hugging my knees as I waited for Loco.

He returned with a small amount of scotch in two small glasses, and I smiled as I took mine.

"Cheers," Loco held up a glass, and I held mine to his.

We both quickly took a sip.

Sitting in silence for a moment, we both let the drink warm our chests, and I enjoyed it for a moment.

"Feeling any better?" Loco asked, finishing off his drink as he looked at me.

"Yeah, a bee just stung me. It's fine," I pulled a shirt over the sting on my arm. Ramma had almost had a heart attack when it happened.

"Ramma was acting like you were being stabbed," Loco laughed.

_**Oaklea,**_

"Stop smiling," Rose hissed at me, "We're supposed to be sad."

But I wasn't sad.

Maybe one Capitol resident had died (though he was technically killed by the Capitol because a Capitol bomb went off by the apartment building he refused to evacuate), but that was nothing compared to the people that had died in the war already.

Every day, the Rebels got closer and closer to the center of the Capitol, meaning the war was nearing an end.

I even let myself get excited that I may be set free. I let myself get excited for meeting Taylor, for seeing my family, for being free of the Capitol forever, for retiring away from this one day, for… for seeing Drew again.

That was the part that really got me thinking.

She was so close.

I knew she was here (meaning President Snow was doing everything to track her). The pictures could have been faked, but I could feel here presence.

Even if I couldn't though, you could tell from everyone else. There was a distain and sadness that could only come from your greatest enemy being in your home, and everyone in District One had it. They wanted her dead, and they wanted it now, something President Snow would happily give his people.

President Snow was the only reason I couldn't be truly happy in a moment like this. I knew he wouldn't let us both go without a fight, and I wasn't exactly sure I could beat him.

After all, he could kill me at any moment.

The Jabberjay could become a Martyr. They could say I was killed by her, too. If anything, crazy tweens who were in love with me would kill Drew.

"Will you two stop fighting?" Isis finished putting me in my black suit.

Rose opened her mouth to say something, but she forgot her anger towards me when the stylist curling her hair burned the top of her head a little bit.

"_OWWW!_ How _dare_ you? That hurt!" Rose went off on the woman.

I rolled my eyes, and whatever maturity her outfit had given her instantly wore off.

They had put Rose in a black pantsuit with a pair of shiny black four inch heels. The jacket was loose but low-cut to nothing underneath. She had a large diamond necklace on her neck, and she tried to keep it simple with a pair of diamond studs and a diamond tennis bracelet.

She looked like an adult, not the materialistic fame-obsessed teenager she was. She looked serious, like she might actually have something more than fashion advice for dates in an interview. And she actually looked like someone I may have liked when I lived in the Capitol.

But that ship had sailed so long ago it felt impossible to imagine.

Especially when she was screaming at a stylist.

Eventually, she stopped, and she angrily took out a cigarette and lit up as the stylist finished up her hair.

I chocked at the smell of the smoke, but I ignored it by picking up a glass of Champaign.

It felt weird to think that reaching for the glass was my first thought when I didn't drink a few months ago, but that didn't stop me from taking a sip.

"How are you, Beaumont?" Isis asked.

President Snow had become more strict about calling me Beaumont because Paparazzi followed me so much, but that was just a front. I knew he was really just reminding me that he controlled everything about me, even my name and looks.

"Great," I sarcastically smiled, finishing off my glass.

"Lying is unattractive."

"Then I must be one of the ugliest men in the Capitol."

Isis let out a weak smile, and she looked at me with weak eyes.

She knew I would most likely die, and she tried to keep that a secret from me, not that she could. Her fake golden eyes told the whole story.

Suddenly, I began to wonder what she looked like under all that gold. For as long as the pictures had known her, she had been like this, and no one had ever wandered what she had been before.

Her skin was tan underneath the gold dye, which I knew since she hadn't renewed it since it wore off last month. Her hair was really dark brown, which I knew because I had seen her once when she hadn't dyed her roots yet. Today, her clothes were inspired by the gem rubies, but I knew that she also loved jeans and tee shirts.

The only thing I guess I didn't know was the color of her eyes.

"Isis, what color are your eyes?"

She stared at me for a moment, shocked by the question.

After a while, she answered.

"One is blue. One is green. Or they were."

"Were?"

"This was an accident that I thrived on afterwards," she admitted, "I didn't close my eyes in time, and I paid the price. My friend got gold on his wrist from it."

"Those are your real eyes?"

Isis nodded.

"I never knew."

"No one ever asked."

I opened my mouth to say something, but then Nicolt appeared.

She was also somber in her outfit for the speech about the Capitol citizen death. Her hair was dyed ink black, and she had it in a professional bun behind her head with small diamond clips here and there. Underneath her black blazer, she had a shiny white silk shirt to match her diamond necklace and diamond earrings. Her lips were painted red, and her eyes were black.

"It's time," Nicolt tapped her platform heels, and Rose quickly stood, applying a layer of ruby red lipstick to her lips.

I smiled goodbye to Isis, and I followed Nicolt down to the stairs of the President's mansion, where I took my seat in between President Snow and Rose.

Nicolt turned on the microphone, and it began.

When she sat down, President Snow began his solemn speech about what a good man he had been, how we would never forget him, and how we would fight for vengeance for his life. I thought it was a little extreme considering that he had just refused to evacuate, but I couldn't show it.

Instead, with Rose's hand entwined with mine, I pretended to be saddened and horrified. It was actually easier than I expected.

I really was horrified and sad but not because of this.

It was being here, being held captive. It was having been taken away from the people I loved, especially Drew and my little sister. It was being treasured by people I hated. It was having to stand for everything I didn't believe in.

"And," President Snow finished, "We intend to make sure the rebels pay for this crime."

The crowd applauded, and I did, too.

But then my eyes wandered away from President Snow to the one girl not clapping.

She stood there in a black suit, a black scarf over her head, and a pair of sunglasses. She blended it in, but I knew her anywhere.

I let in a small gasp, and she smiled weakly.

She made the sign for _I Love You_, and I was almost about to do it, too, when she suddenly disappeared back into the crowd.

"I love you, too, Drew…." I whispered to myself.

"What?"

I looked back to Rose.

"Huh?"

"Did you say something?"

"No, what would I say?"


End file.
